I read this article today and had to laugh!
See? There is some justice.

Farmer takes revenge on squatter ... with a forklift
01.09.06



While the intruder sleeps in his caravan, Alan Roberts decides to take things into his own hands.

It was an act of revenge on a squatter that most farmers can only dream of. Faced with a uninvited intruder moving onto his land complete with car and caravan, Alan Roberts decided to take matters into his own hands.

While the illegal tenant was still soundly asleep, Mr Roberts got into his yellow JCB forklift and prepared to teach him a lesson.

First, he picked up the man's burgundy Vauxhall Cavalier from its spot on one of his fields and dumped it unceremoniously outside his land.

Then he returned to scoop up the white caravan, still housing the unsuspecting squatter.

As it was lifted into the air, the man, in his 20s, appeared at the window looking rather groggy and startled to discover he was suddenly airbourne.

But Mr Roberts, 46, who rents Grange Farm near Immingham, North East Lincolnshire from wealthy landowner Lord Yarborough, ignored the man's pleas and moved the caravan and its passenger off his land before dumping them both.

Last night, the farmer issued a stark warning to any would-be squatters who might be eyeing up his land as a potential home.

"If they want to come back for seconds, they can," he said. "I am a force to be reckoned with. That guy was not staying on my land. I have got the guy fairly wound up and there was a lot of swearing on both sides.

"The increasing trouble with squatters has been winding us up - so I am taking the law into my own hands."

Mr Roberts said it was the second time this week that the mystery man had parked the vehicles on his land. He first arrived on Tuesday evening, and the next day Mr Roberts gave him two hours to move the car and caravan.

After he ignored the polite request, the farmer picked up the Cavalier with his forklift truck and dumped it at the side of the road.

It was when the squatter came back and bedded down for a second night that Mr Roberts decided to teach him an early morning lesson.

The squatter was the first man who had set up camp on Grange Farm, but Mr Roberts said it was only the latest in a series of incidents.

Farmers in the area claim they have lost hundreds of pounds to poachers and are plagued by others driving four-wheel vehicles over their fields.

Mr Roberts, who is married with a 12-year-old daughter and farms cereal crops on his 700-acre plot, said the man had since disappeared with both his vehicles.

Spokeswoman for Humberside Police, Lisa Fleming, said: "Police attended but it is a civil dispute between the landowner and the vehicle and caravan owner.

"Officers spoke to both parties and the caravan owner volunteered to move his vehicle within 24 hours."