Had "The Talk " with my 11 year old son

[Sprinklerman]

It was time , Ihad the sit down with my 11 year old son , he is heading for middle school this fall . So I explained to him that there is no Santa claus . "But Dad i saw the pictures of him in our basement " Yup , Ben thats called photo shop on the computer . " You mean you were lying to us all this time " Ben its a tradition . and sorry we are the easter Bunny , and tooth fairy also . He was a bit disappointed , but lived . Then he asks " Is there anything else ? " Well yes there is . What do you know about where babies come from ? He knew more than I thought . But when I explained that it goes inside ......................
"THATS GROSS " , " You had to do that to mom ? " Yes thats how it works . I told him dont discuss this with his 8 year old brother . Then he said " So you and mom had to do that 2 whole times " I paused , Yes as much as I hated it , we did it twice . ........................... 1 little lie

 

[dieselcrawler]

With only 2 boys, and 4 girls, momma is gonna be more busy than I.... but I do my part with the girls, I make sure they know to inform any boy that even thinks about 'oh will you be my girlfriend' gets told daddy carries a gun... openly when needed for shock value! I can't wait till the first brave young fella shows up at the door to pick up a daughter. "Son, I want you to look at this nice hand made leather holster her older brother made for me... fits the Glock real nice, even with 17 rounds in the mag, 18 if you count the one in the chamber... "

 

[Howling]

With only 2 boys, and 4 girls, momma is gonna be more busy than I.... but I do my part with the girls, I make sure they know to inform any boy that even thinks about 'oh will you be my girlfriend' gets told daddy carries a gun... openly when needed for shock value! I can't wait till the first brave young fella shows up at the door to pick up a daughter. "Son, I want you to look at this nice hand made leather holster her older brother made for me... fits the Glock real nice, even with 17 rounds in the mag, 18 if you count the one in the chamber... "

"If you have any impure thoughts about my daughter remember I have no problems going back to jail."

When mine were teenagers their friends always had a slight doubt of my sanity.