So let me tell you a story of mowers, boats, carnage and unbridled passion. Ok, forget the passion but everything else is true.
For some crazy reason, I bought a vintage boat with an outboard motor. I spent all winter restoring the boat in anticipation of summer. It was a labor of love that devoured weekends and evenings with the worst of it getting the finicky outboard to run.
Finally a glorious spring day came and we loaded up kids and boat. We launched the boat and idled off the trailer like pros. Reversed out into the lake, sun shining and all was right with the world. I went to shift into forward gear but the lever wouldn't move. I fiddled, banged and cursed but it was stuck in reverse. We backed our way silently back to the boat launch. The wife and kids maintained an uneasy silence as I cursed under my breath.
It was a busy day at the boat launch. It was hot and people were impatient. Finally my wife pulled up with the truck and trailer. Now let me tell you, my wife has a commercial driver license and I have seen her drive massive RV's, horse trailers and travel trailer with ease. However, this tiny little single axle trailer confounded her. Multiple attempts to back down the ramp resulted in jackknifing of the trailer. Finally a passerby just lifted up the trailer and set it straight. Hot, furious and short tempered I drug the boat to the trailer and began winching it on. Naturally about midway on the trailer the winch strap snapped. Despite seeing red, I kept my cool and with herculean effort I yanked the boat the rest of the way on the trailer.
My muscles screamed and back moaned as I lept into the truck and pulled out of the launch, trucks lining up waiting to get in the water. A horrible screech sounded.....I had forgot to put the outboard up, grinding the new prop into oblivion! The ride home was tense, to say the least!
When I got home I was determined to salvage the day. I jumped on the tractor to take out my fury on the weeds and briars that had accumulated. I was happily chopping them away when I felt a jolt, heard a clang and felt liquid raining down on me! I lept off the tractor to discover that I had mowed over our well head!
This time I let loose the cannons! A blue stream of epithets covered the countryside as rain fell. Soon the cool water drops were replaced by a harsh stab of pain. Then another and another! That's when I became aware that I had parked on top of a hornets nest!
The moral of this story is boats are nothing but trouble!
