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Old 05-23-2005, 06:11 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

Hi, I'm Rodney and I'm a tractorholic. I was hoping there may be some good doctors to help me with this sudden addiction.

It all began with a dream. A dream of my own tractor. Little did I know at the time. No one warned me of the dangers of tractor owner ship.
It's like a drug. And of course there are dealers. And worst of all, it's legal. Dealer can sell you a tractor at any given moment. It's all so sinister.
I've had my tractor for one month. It calls to me. . I can not resist. I now have 66 hours tractoring. That is time stolen by my addiction from being able to spend time doing things I SHOULD be doing.
Oh well, enough feeling sorry for myself. Is there help? Are there classes? Will the US government help me afford the withdrawel medicines?
All questions of a distorted mind. Help me....

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Old 05-23-2005, 06:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

66 Hours in one month - that's pretty good. I don't think I've got 66 hours on mine and I've had it for 9 months. You have too much free time - get some kids or sell the wife and see if you can get some more implements.

[img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
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Old 05-23-2005, 06:39 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

Rodney,

Do not worry, all is normal except for your wife, who seems to have too much control over you. It is obvious that this is the case and that you do not realize it, since you are mentioning such things with only 66 hours on your tractor in one month. SLACKER!!! [img]/forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img]

After posting this message I'll have to take a look at your profile and see if you are in the area. It might be necessary for the Easter Ohio/Western PA TBN lunch group to pay a visit...offering assistance/help to get your thinking back on track. Thoughts such as you expressed should not surface until you reach about 60 hours per week of seat time. IF EVEN THEN. That would only be if you have a full time job to keep you away from the tractor.

That woman of yours seems to have exceptional persuasive powers! If you encourage her to spend more time in the kitchen where she belongs, these powers may weaken gradually.

I'm not sure what other advice to give except to emphasize again that you are normal and it is just the woman that is influencing you and making you feel that guilt.

Hang in there buddy. Keep that tractor moving and eventually you will come back to reality...probably during the divorce proceedings... [img]/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]
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Old 05-23-2005, 06:48 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

Henro is right. I'm probably going to get kicked off the TBN for admitting my low hour meter count.

You better think of getting a vasectomy. My two kids eat up way too much of my time. I'd probably have over 200 hours on my tractor by now if I didn't have small children that needed attention.

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Old 05-23-2005, 08:34 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

<font color="blue"> That is time stolen by my addiction from being able to spend time doing things I SHOULD be doing.
</font>

Rodney the very first thing that you should be doing is getting your priorities straight. What you SHOULD be doing is firing up the tractor to get the chores done and build up some real seat time.

Man there's brush hogging, and grass mowing to do. Not to mention all the loader work that needs to be done around your place to get things looking ship shape.

Drag a box-blade around to redistribute dirt piles from point A to point B and then move them back again just because you have the technology to do so.

And if you should be lucky enough to have a backhoe well then Rodney your wife will just plain need to brand you as a "lethal weapon" cause you'll soon be digging trees up that for no reason just need to be moved or maybe eliminated altogether.

Rodney you have a tractor and a mission in life. Let the testosterone start to flow and please try to get with the program..... [img]/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

One final warning. As long as you mist your brow with water before you go back into the house at the end of the day you can pretty much convince your wife that it's all work and no play. Keep a little spray bottle of water in your tool box. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] But if you walk in there otherwise and with a smile on your face you're dead meat. You'll end up giving your wife the spare key and teaching her how to operate the tractor to boot. Or maybe worse some real expensive jewelry to play with. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]
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Old 05-23-2005, 08:54 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

What ever you do, keep it greased up!!!! [img]/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Ken
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Old 05-23-2005, 09:01 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

How do you get your wife off the tractor so you get seat time? [img]/forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]
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Old 05-23-2005, 09:58 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

Henro, ROTFLMAO!!! That was good!

Hmmm, it seems I've asked a bunch of druggies how to kick the crank habit.

As for how to get that many hours, there's 4 1/2 weeks in a month. 8 hours saturday, 8 hours sunday 1 1/2 hours a night comes to about 97 hours a month. Obviously, Henro is right. I've been slacking! In my defense, I did do the 50 hr maintainance as well...

Pineridge, I've no chance with the woman I tell ya.
</font><font color="blue" class="small">(
That woman of yours seems to have exceptional persuasive powers! If you encourage her to spend more time in the kitchen where she belongs, these powers may weaken gradually.
)</font>

Coversation goes, "Honey, I'm going to go get naked now" answer is "I'll be right there honey"...
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Old 05-23-2005, 10:01 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

</font><font color="blue" class="small">( What ever you do, keep it greased up!!!! [img]/forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Ken )</font>

That, my friend is a whooooole nuther story. See this thread. Grease Fittings
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Old 05-23-2005, 10:05 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Tractor addiction - wife abandonment - Guilt

</font><font color="blue" class="small">( How do you get your wife off the tractor so you get seat time? [img]/forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img] )</font>

I freely admit it. I lied to support my habit. I told her it was to dangerous for her. They tricked me tonight and told me supper was ready. It isn't. Oh, the web's we weave!
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