I try to keep the handles on my grinders but sometimes you cant get them into tight spots with the handle on so some of my 4 grinders have handles and others dont. As for tightening, I always use the wrench on the disc without the 5/8" center hub nut, but only just to lightly snug it down and even then it take much more pressure to get them off.
regarding the wobble post, you are not installing it right if it wobbles. The little spacer washer sometimes needs to be flipped over for thin disc. One side has a fairly high shoulder and this goes down toward the grinder when using thin cut off wheels. It goes up when using 1/8" or thicker wheels. If you are using open center (no nut on the disc) disc, make sure that they are properly centered on the little shoulder and that the top nut is on the right way also. Some of the fastener nuts have a flat side and a side with a shoulder. The shoulder side goes up for thin disc and down for thicker one. If the grinder disc wobbles it isnt centered and you are putting yourself in danger of an exploding disc if using it this way. Stop immediately and reset the disc on the grinder shaft.
As for using only one grinder, when doing task that take some wire wheel brushing and some grinding, some sanding etc, it is so much smarter to have two or more grinders rather than constantly changing the attachment. If it was a thousand dollar machine I could understand having only one, but for $9 for an elcheapo up to around $100 for top end, there really isnt any reason for the average comsumer to not have 2 or more. I use 3 of the 4" type each with a different blade or brush and a 7" for heavy grinding. If I am doing something where I might need all of them, I just hook in a power strip to my extension cord and have them all plugged in so I can just grab the one I want.