Common Sense's Obituary

   / Common Sense's Obituary #1  

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Common Sense\'s Obituary

Following was e-mailed to me by a friend. While I try to be optimistic in the troublesome world we live in, much of the following may indeed be true. But, I'd still like to think otherwise. Does anybody have any real life, practical experiences or anecdotal observations they can share to suggest Common Sense is still alive and well??

_____________________________

Today we mourn the passing of an old friend, by the name of Common Sense.

Common Sense lived a long life but died in the United States from heart failure on the brink of the new millennium. No one really knows how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He selflessly devoted his life to service in schools, hospitals, homes, and factories helping folks get jobs done without fanfare and foolishness. For decades, petty rules, silly laws, and frivolous lawsuits held no power over Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating such valued lessons as to know when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, and why life isn't always fair.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not the kids), and it's okay to come in second.

A veteran of the Industrial Revolution, the Great Depression, and the Technological Revolution, Common Sense survived cultural and educational trends including body piercing, whole language, and the 'new math.'

But, his health declined when he became infected with the 'If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-worth-it' virus.

In recent decades his waning strength proved no match for the ravages of well intentioned but overbearing regulations. He watched in pain as good people became ruled by self-seeking lawyers. His health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented zero-tolerance policies.

Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for taking a swig of mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. It declined even further when schools had to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student, but could not inform the parent when a female student was pregnant or wanted an abortion.

Finally, Common Sense lost his will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, criminals received better treatment than victims, and federal judges stuck their noses in everything from the Boy Scouts to professional sports.

Finally, when a woman too ignorant to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot was awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw in the towel.

As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic but was kept informed of developments regarding questionable regulations such as those for low flow toilets, rocking chairs, and stepladders.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughters, Responsibility and Prudence; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers: My Rights and Ima Whiner. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. ------- Author Unknown
 
   / Common Sense's Obituary #3  
Re: Common Sense\'s Obituary

Thats great!
 
   / Common Sense's Obituary #4  
Re: Common Sense\'s Obituary

To paraphrase Mark Twain "Rumors of the death have been greatly exagerated." I think common sense has gone underground but I know it still flourishes in pockets of New England. Good article and oh so true.
 
   / Common Sense's Obituary #5  
Re: Common Sense\'s Obituary

I think common sense has gone underground but I know it still flourishes in pockets of New England.

I think common sense is very prevalent until you're around most politicians, lawyers, liberal media and the Teacher's Union.

But, when I read the first post (the Obituary)...I got soooo depressed!!
 
   / Common Sense's Obituary #6  
Re: Common Sense\'s Obituary

This seems to apply a bit.

"The reason people blame things on the previous generations is that
there's only one other choice."
- Doug Larson

PARENT WINS !!

My son came home from school one day,
A smirk was on his face.
He'd decided he was smart enough
To put me in my place.

HE SAID:

Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
That's taught by Mr. Wright?
It's all about the laws today:

THE CHILDREN'S BILL OF RIGHTS.
IT SAYS:

I don't have to clean my room,
Don't have to cut my hair.
No one can tell me what to think,
How to speak, or what to wear.
I have freedom FROM religion,
And regardless what you say,
I don't have to bow my head,
And I sure DON'T HAVE TO PRAY.
I can wear earrings if I want,
And pierce my tongue & nose.
I can read & watch just what I like,
Be tattooed from head to toes.
AND if you ever spank me,
I'll charge you with the crime,
I'll back up all my charges,
With the marks on my behind.

HE SAID:

Don't you ever touch me,
This body's for MY use, ,
Not for your hugs and kisses
That's just more child abuse.

HE CONTINUED WITH:

Don't preach about your morals,
Like your mama did to you.
That's nothing but your mind control,
And it's illegal too!
Mom, I have these children's rights,
So you can't influence me,
Or I'll call Children's Services,
Better known as C.S.D.


MY TURN!

Well, of course, my natural instinct
Was to toss him out the door.
But the chance to teach a lesson,
Made me think a little more.
I mulled it over carefully,
I couldn't let this go.
A little smile crept to my face...
He was messing with a pro!

AND AWAY WE GO!

Next day I took him shopping,
At the local Good Will store,
I told him, "pick out all you want!
There are shirts & pants galore."
I've called and checked with C.S.D.,
They said they didn't care,
If I bought you K-Mart shoes,
Instead of Nike Airs.

OH! And... I've canceled that appointment
To take your driver's test.
The C.S.D. is unconcerned,
So I'll decide what's best.

I SAID:

No time to stop and eat,
Or pick up stuff to munch,
And tomorrow you can start to learn
To make your own sack lunch.
Just save that raging appetite,
And wait 'til dinner time.
We're having liver and onions.
It's a favorite dish of mine.

He ASKED:

Can we stop to rent a movie,
So I can watch the VCR?
Sorry, I said, I sold your TV,
For new tires on my car.

I also rented out your room,
You can take the couch instead.
The C.S.D. requires just a roof above your head.
Your clothing won't be trendy now,
I'll choose the food we eat,
That allowance that you used to get
Will buy me something neat.
I'm selling off your jet ski,
Dirt-bike & roller blades.
Check out the PARENTS' BILL OF RIGHTS,
It's in effect today!
Hey, Hot Shot, are you crying?
Why are you on your knees?
Are you asking God to help you?
...GO CALL THE C.S.D/w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif



Jeff
 
   / Common Sense's Obituary #7  
Re: Common Sense\'s Obituary

Good, Jeff.
 
   / Common Sense's Obituary #8  
Re: Common Sense\'s Obituary

I wish I would've seen this when my son was still home! /w3tcompact/icons/laugh.gif
 
   / Common Sense's Obituary #9  
Re: Common Sense\'s Obituary

bravo!
if it was common sense,we'd all have it
 
   / Common Sense's Obituary #10  
Re: Common Sense\'s Obituary

Common sense has to be the most mis-named thing in the world. UNcommon sense would be more accurate. /w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif
 
 
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