Cami
Silver Member
- Joined
- Oct 31, 2009
- Messages
- 183
- Location
- Ladysmith, British Columbia
- Tractor
- Don't have one of my own! I work on other people's machines.
I'm hiding from the rain today....
There was a wonderful poet from out my way named Robert Swanson who wrote about logging. A book of his collected poems, called Rhymes of a Western Logger, is an entertaining read. I'm not a shill, honest!
He writes about all sorts of characters. My favourites include a story of a locomotive engineer who'd stop along his run to visit his mistress and a deceased boilermaker sent to work on the boilers "down below" by St. Peter and he finds the working conditions better than when he was alive.
Here's one of my favourites that I wanted to share...and provide some tractor related content. The Cat Skinners' Prayer:
I've shivered and shook on a Dozer
I've ranted, and raved, and I've cu'sed.
My kidneys are dislocated
And I've swallowed ten bushels of dust;
My fingers are broken and bleeding
From wielding the tools of repair.
O God of Internal Combustion,
Please answer a cat-skinner's prayer!
Now, I've studied your parts-book Bible
And here are the things I require:
A pair of unstretchable cat-tracks
That will never "come off" in the mire;
But the thing that would tickle my fancy,
When I'm miles from the fuel supply,
Is a tank,for both gas and for diesel,
Of the type that will never run dry.
Oh, send your toil-worn disciple,
Who has gobbled and swallowed your smoke,
A heaven-invented fuel pump
That will fire on every stroke,
A set of perfected injectors
With guts that will never wear.
O God of Internal Combustion,
Please answer a cat-skinner's prayer!
Please send me the grease of perfection
And a change of eternal oil,
Some diamond bearinged cat-rolls
That will run in abrasive soil,
A final-driving assembly
With everlasting gears,
And a set of sleeves and pistons
That will run for a million years.
Oh send me lining, immortal,
For my steering-clutch mechanism,
And a cranking-motor magneto
With permanent magnetism;
A set of valves and tappets
At which I will never swear.
Oh God of Internal Combustion,
Please answer a cat-skinner's prayer!
Great God of the Red-Hot Piston,
I have worshipped and served you well,
Forsaking the Gods of my fathers,
Till my soul has been slated for ****!
If you'll send me the things that I ask for
I will never work Sundays again;
But I'll worship Internal Combustion
Forever and ever. Amen.
There was a wonderful poet from out my way named Robert Swanson who wrote about logging. A book of his collected poems, called Rhymes of a Western Logger, is an entertaining read. I'm not a shill, honest!
He writes about all sorts of characters. My favourites include a story of a locomotive engineer who'd stop along his run to visit his mistress and a deceased boilermaker sent to work on the boilers "down below" by St. Peter and he finds the working conditions better than when he was alive.
Here's one of my favourites that I wanted to share...and provide some tractor related content. The Cat Skinners' Prayer:
I've shivered and shook on a Dozer
I've ranted, and raved, and I've cu'sed.
My kidneys are dislocated
And I've swallowed ten bushels of dust;
My fingers are broken and bleeding
From wielding the tools of repair.
O God of Internal Combustion,
Please answer a cat-skinner's prayer!
Now, I've studied your parts-book Bible
And here are the things I require:
A pair of unstretchable cat-tracks
That will never "come off" in the mire;
But the thing that would tickle my fancy,
When I'm miles from the fuel supply,
Is a tank,for both gas and for diesel,
Of the type that will never run dry.
Oh, send your toil-worn disciple,
Who has gobbled and swallowed your smoke,
A heaven-invented fuel pump
That will fire on every stroke,
A set of perfected injectors
With guts that will never wear.
O God of Internal Combustion,
Please answer a cat-skinner's prayer!
Please send me the grease of perfection
And a change of eternal oil,
Some diamond bearinged cat-rolls
That will run in abrasive soil,
A final-driving assembly
With everlasting gears,
And a set of sleeves and pistons
That will run for a million years.
Oh send me lining, immortal,
For my steering-clutch mechanism,
And a cranking-motor magneto
With permanent magnetism;
A set of valves and tappets
At which I will never swear.
Oh God of Internal Combustion,
Please answer a cat-skinner's prayer!
Great God of the Red-Hot Piston,
I have worshipped and served you well,
Forsaking the Gods of my fathers,
Till my soul has been slated for ****!
If you'll send me the things that I ask for
I will never work Sundays again;
But I'll worship Internal Combustion
Forever and ever. Amen.
