Wacky Warning Labels

[Soundguy]

I'm guessing there's a good story behind that warning!

soundguy

[patrick_g]

Originally Posted by scuvnut

On a Swedish chainsaw -

DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.

(What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)

Swedish chainsaws are exported to Poland. Nuf said?

Pat

[3RRL]

Just received this from one of the kids...
1.
On a blanket from Taiwan -

NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.

2.
On a helmet-mounted mirror used by US cyclists -

REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU

3.
On a Taiwanese shampoo -

USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE

4.
On a bottle-top of a UK flavoured milk drink -

AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT

5.
On a New Zealand insect spray -

THIS PRODUCT IS NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS

6.
In a US guide to setting up a new computer -

TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING

(Sensible, but the instructions were INSIDE the box.)

7.
In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles -

OPEN OTHER END

8.
On a packet of Sunmaid raisins -

WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL ?

9.
On a Sears hairdryer -

DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING

10.
On a bag of Fritos -

YOU COULD BE A WINNER ! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY ! DETAILS INSIDE!

11.
On a bar of Dial soap -

DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP

12.
On a Tesco's Tiramisu -

DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.

(Printed on bottom of box)

13.
On a M&S Bread Pudding -

PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

14.
On a Korean kitchen knife -

KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN

15.
On a string of Chinese Christmas lights -

FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY

16.
On a Japanese food processor -

NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER.

17.
On Sainsbury's peanuts -

WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS

18.
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -

INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.

19.
On a child's Superman costume -

WARNING, THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.

20.
On some frozen dinners -

SERVING SUGGESTION - DEFROST

21.
On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box -

FITS ONE HEAD

22.
On packaging for Rowenta iron -

DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY

23.
On Boot's Children's cough medicine -

DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY

24.
On Nytol sleep aid -

WARNING - MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS

[MReeb]

Originally Posted by 3RRL

Just received this from one of the kids...
8.
On a packet of Sunmaid raisins -

WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL ?

9.
On a Sears hairdryer -

DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING

I know an older woman who has a pretty good sized burn scar on her leg from that. Her electric blanket died and she decided to put the hairdryer under the covers with her. It got hot enough that it melted the blankets and cooked her leg. I don't think I've ever slept sound enough that my flesh could be cooked but...
So are we supposed to play jump the shark with our raisins? We could make little ramps and launch our raisins across the table. Good way to have the wife give you a cuff in the back of the head and that look she gives you. I tend to load up my cereal with extra raisins and fresh berries. Nothing better than some blueberries or raspberries with some pecans on my morning oatmeal.

[Iplayfarmer]

Oh good! If we're going to get into translational errors I have a bunch from my years spent in Thailand. My all time favorite was on a can of flea powder for dogs...

"Pulverize the powder directly on the dog. Do not pulverize in or near eyes."

[patrick_g]

Note on Japanese made radio direction finder antenna cover...

Warning: Do not except this cover.

Not exactly a moment of Zen but I cracked the code.

They meant not to leave the cover off.

Warning sign posted in the pilot house above the door to the radio room/navigator's station of a Portuguese fishing boat...

No one aloud in the radio room.

My buddy and I looked at the sign, looked at each other, and simultaneously we both put a finger to our lips to give the universal sign of library rules (shh, be quiet) and proceeded to enter.

Translated safety message to children.

Do not follow the ball when it makes the street.

Pat

[PaulChristenson]

Originally Posted by 3RRL

Just received this from one of the kids...


24.
On Nytol sleep aid -

WARNING - MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS

We ran a car accident, where it turned out the operator of the vehicle had taken....WAIT FOR IT...NYTOL, but then decided she had to go out and buy her cigarettes...

[N80]

Nytol, like most OTC sleep aids is just diphenhydramine....a.k.a. Benadryl.

The funny (as in scary) thing is that some studies have shown that driving while taking benadryl can impair your driving ability as much as being over the legal blood alcohol level or as much as some narcotics and 'nerve' pills.

[patrick_g]

As a part of the HF warnings for a solar powered welding helmet (after the part about how California knows they cause cancer)

"The Welding Helmet will not protect against explosive devices or corrosive liquids."

Gee and I thought it would be cheap protection from IED's and the occasional surprise dunking in battery acid or lye.

Pat

[Iplayfarmer]

Originally Posted by patrick_g

As a part of the HF warnings for a solar powered welding helmet (after the part about how California knows they cause cancer)

"The Welding Helmet will not protect against explosive devices or corrosive liquids."

Gee and I thought it would be cheap protection from IED's and the occasional surprise dunking in battery acid or lye.

Pat

I know it's been said, but I can't help saying it again....

What kind of idiots did whatever was done to make it necessary to put these warnings on some of these things?

One of my favorite phrases I've seen lately was on the glass door of the grocery store in reaction to the recent tomato/salmonella scare. They said that "out of abundance of caution" they were going to pull all tomatoes of a certain variety from their shelves. I think "abundance of caution" is a fancy way of saying "over-reaction". That seems to fit many of these wacky warning labels.

I think we should petition to have a single phrase be allowed to cover it all...

To quote Shania Twain, "Dont' Be Stupid!"