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   #1  

/pine

Super Star Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2009
Messages
13,191
Just so everything is perfectly clear...

...I'm going to get some new eye glasses...!

Oh and BTW...it has occurred to me that If you are buying smart water for $5 a bottle...

It isn't working...!


Here's today's stock report:

• Helium is up.
• Feathers were down.
• Paper was stationary.
• Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.
• Knives were up sharply.
• Cows steered into a bull market.
• Pencils lost a few points.
• Hiking equipment was trailing.
• Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.
• Weights were up in heavy trading.
• Light switches were off.
• Mining equipment hit rock bottom.
• Diapers remained unchanged.
• Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.
• The market for raisins dried up.
• Coca-Cola fizzled.
• Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.
• Sun peaked at midday.
• Balloon prices were inflated.
• Scott Tissue touched a new bottom.
• And batteries exploded in an attempt to recharge the market.
 
  
  • Thread Starter
#3  
OP
/pine

/pine

Super Star Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2009
Messages
13,191
My psychiatrist asked me if anyone else in my family suffered from mental illness.

I said: "No we all seem to enjoy it"...!
 
  
  • Thread Starter
#4  
OP
/pine

/pine

Super Star Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2009
Messages
13,191
I told my suitcases we weren’t going on vacation...

Now I’m dealing with emotional baggage...!
 
   #8  

Xfaxman

Super Star Member
Joined
Feb 8, 2013
Messages
11,467
Location
Guthrie, OK
Tractor
Toolcat 5610 G Bobcat V417 TORO+Loader
When you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery?
 
   #9  

dirttoys

Silver Member
Joined
Feb 20, 2021
Messages
237
Location
Ozarks
Tractor
ac 170 bobcat 773 tak 235
my daddy married his sister, but, it didn't effect me..............
 
  
  • Thread Starter
#10  
OP
/pine

/pine

Super Star Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2009
Messages
13,191
Q: What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle, and a well dressed man on a bicycle...?










A : Attire.
 
 
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