Groan part quatre

   / Groan part quatre #31  

Jim Shooz

Veteran Member
Joined
Aug 12, 2011
Messages
1,467
Location
Tauranga NZ
Tractor
Kubota BX2350
Our local newspaper had a big headline "Man dies after being pulled from the water"
My warped sense of humour has me thinking 'If they'd left him in the water he'd still be alive'.1
 
   / Groan part quatre
  • Thread Starter
#32  
OP
Pixguy

Pixguy

Super Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2010
Messages
7,319
Location
By the lake in NH
Tractor
2011 MF 2410 TLB
There were posts deleted within the first ten. :)
Which should've been done instead of closing thread. That member was likely put on vacation but I hope he continues to post with tbn rules.
I come across dozens of memes and jokes that I enjoy and have forwarded to friends but won't post here.
 
   / Groan part quatre
  • Thread Starter
#34  
OP
Pixguy

Pixguy

Super Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2010
Messages
7,319
Location
By the lake in NH
Tractor
2011 MF 2410 TLB
On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple is involved in a fatal car accident. The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they began to wonder: Could they possibly get married in Heaven? When St. Peter showed up, they asked him. St. Peter said, "I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out,'" and he left. The couple sat and waited, and waited. Two months passed and the couple were still waiting. While waiting, they began to wonder what would happen if it didn't work out; could you get a divorce in heaven? After yet another month, St. Peter finally returned, looking somewhat bedraggled. "Yes," he informed the couple, "You can get married in Heaven." "Great!" said the couple, "But we were just wondering, what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?" St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slammed his clipboard onto the ground. "What's wrong?" asked the frightened couple. "OH, COME ON!," St. Peter shouted, "It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have any idea how long it'll take me to find a lawyer?"
 
   / Groan part quatre
  • Thread Starter
#35  
OP
Pixguy

Pixguy

Super Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2010
Messages
7,319
Location
By the lake in NH
Tractor
2011 MF 2410 TLB
Our mods? :LOL:

3237FF82-BCBD-4B52-9A6D-E5BE9A4C3E5E.jpeg
 
   / Groan part quatre
  • Thread Starter
#36  
OP
Pixguy

Pixguy

Super Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2010
Messages
7,319
Location
By the lake in NH
Tractor
2011 MF 2410 TLB
At breakfast, the husband says to his wife “What would you do if I won the Lotto?” She says, “ I’d take my half and leave you”! He says great, “Here's $6, I won $12 yesterday”! "Hey, stay in touch”.
 
   / Groan part quatre #37  

ovrszd

Epic Contributor
Joined
May 27, 2006
Messages
32,484
Location
Missouri
Tractor
Kubota M9540, Ford 3910FWD, Ford 555A, JD2210
A man has 50 yard line tickets for the Super Bowl. As he sits down, a man comes down and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him.
"No," he says, "The seat is empty."
"This is incredible," said the man. "Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Super Bowl, the biggest sporting event in the world, and not use it?"
He says: "Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. I was supposed to come with my wife, but she passed away. This is the first Super bowl we haven't been to together since we got married in 1967."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.. But couldn't you find someone else - a friend or relative, or even a neighbor to take the seat?". The man shakes his head.
"No, they're all at the funeral."
 
   / Groan part quatre #39  

alexpops

Gold Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2017
Messages
492
Location
NSB, FL
Tractor
LS XR4150, CAT 303.5CR, Kubota ZD331
Funny ... same thing happened to me. Only difference? She was Chinese & named IRENE
 
   / Groan part quatre #40  

Xfaxman

Super Star Member
Joined
Feb 8, 2013
Messages
12,694
Location
Guthrie, OK
Tractor
Toolcat 5610 G - Bobcat V417 - TORO+Loader
Groan m.jpg
Groan m.jpg
 
 
Top