Practical Joke

[buckeyefarmer]

My wife will use a rubber snake to scare her mom, lol

 

[Jstpssng]

I had a friend pull a joke on his wife with a dead raccoon. She screamed - beat the dead coon with a shovel - everybody almost croaked they laughed so hard. Finally - she calmed down and saw the humor in the situation.

The following week this guy had a new brand of Tuna in his sandwich for lunch. What the H*LL - he ate it. When he got home from work - there on the counter - an empty can of cat food. They don't own a cat.

That's the kind of woman who doesn't get mad... she gets even.

 

[PILOON]

My Crazy Page

Do you fart in bed ?

If this story doesn't make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and I値l pray for you. This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years, the only friction in their marriage was the husband痴 habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke the noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning
she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor, she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out. The years went by and he continued to rip them out. Then one Christmas day morning, as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling the bed covers back, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. Sometime later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bath room. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, 滴oney you were right all these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you. 展hat do you mean? asked his wife. 展ell, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened, but by the grace of god, some Vaseline and two fingers. I think I got most of them back in?.............?.

Don't just keep it, share it along
LOL

LOL, on the floor with sore gut!

 

[PILOON]

Funny, you brought this thread up which had a link to another about practical jokes... which I just had to peruse. Yet the joke 12 years ago was on one of the posters who told of working in an auto parts store which "sold" right and left side lug nuts. The irony is that older Chrysler products did have such a thing; left handed threads on one side of the vehicle.

That's so true.
We had an old trailer tat had Chrysler unders and snapped one of the lug nuts off, mind U we had to use a 3/4 air gun to do so.

 

[LS Tractor Owner]

A good joke that I still get away with, both my adult sons also practice this on a frequent basis:

On the kitchen sink that has the hand sprayer off to the side, take a rubber band or twist tie and tighten the trigger to the "on" position. Aim it to where someone would stand if they were going to use the sink. When they turn on the faucet, it hits them instantly! Usually they are too shocked to immediately turn the faucet off, giving them a good soaking. It works multiple times on the same person too.... (Wifey really gets mad at me now)

 

[drssg]

My greatest achievement as a child was when I found a dead snake. Our old farm house had a regular door at the foot of the stairway to the second floor, and the light had been burned out in that area for a while. That meant that you were always in the dark when walking down the stairs. I wrapped the dead snake around the inside of the door handle, and my sister grabbed hold of it when she came down the stairs. She let out a shriek and went running back up stairs.

She got me plenty of times, but we both still agree that was a good one.

 

[k0ua]

That's so true.
We had an old trailer tat had Chrysler unders and snapped one of the lug nuts off, mind U we had to use a 3/4 air gun to do so.

Hit the trigger and let it rattle until it twisted it off huh? All the while wondering why these stinkin nuts won't break loose...

 

[TractorGuy]

I've had a couple of practical jokes I attempted backfire on me so I no longer try them.

I replaced a co-workers coil wire with a vacuum hose once. He got in and fired it up and proceeded towards the road. I knew when he tried to accelerate it would fall on it's face and likely cause an accident so I had to chase him through the parking lot to stop him before he got to the road. Who knew the spark would pass through a rubber tube! Turns out most black rubber has enough carbon in it to be conductive.

I saw a guy changing a ballast in a light fixture in my shop one day with 4 of his co-workers looking on. I kept a camera in my desk and thought it would make a funny "How Many Does It Take To Change a Ballast" photo. The camera flash went off and almost caused the guy to fall off his ladder. It wasn't too funny then.

One practical joke I witnessed that WAS funny was a co-worker placed a smoke bomb in the engine compartment on a guy's VW that had just rebuilt the engine. He ran a wire from the hot side of the coil to a open filament Bosch fuse and the other end to ground. He stuck the fuse for the smoke bomb under the Bosch fuse filament so when it blew it would light the smoke bomb fuse. The look on the kid's face when he started the car and that smoke bomb went off was priceless.

 

[tjkubota93]

This fella snuck up on me when I stepped outside to mix some thinset so I bashed his head in.

Then I couldn't help myself, I went and started laying tiles. After 10 minutes I asked my wife to go get my big yellow level, I left it outside (next to the dead copperhead).

My 5 year old had a neon yellow rubber snake that has ended up under her pillow and in the cabinets a few times. I figured that was ok, because nobody would take a neon yellow snake seriously. I guess my wife does.

 

[Jstpssng]

A good joke that I still get away with, both my adult sons also practice this on a frequent basis:

On the kitchen sink that has the hand sprayer off to the side, take a rubber band or twist tie and tighten the trigger to the "on" position. Aim it to where someone would stand if they were going to use the sink. When they turn on the faucet, it hits them instantly! Usually they are too shocked to immediately turn the faucet off, giving them a good soaking. It works multiple times on the same person too.... (Wifey really gets mad at me now)

I've seen that done a couple of times... at the self service gas pumps. Some people seem to think that it's clever to lock the pump handle open before replacing it into the pump housing.