Figure out what is really important in life, and try to make decisions that won,t have regrets.
How much longer do you figure your FIL will be around, why not let him be in charge of taking care of the driveway, as long as it is passable, and safe, does it really matter ? I wish my stubborn FIL was still around, and I wished I would of been much kinder and more tolerant of his ways when he was around. I still kick myself in the butt for being so stubborn, just as you are being. What else does your FIL have to look forward to, when he gets up each morning ?
And as a doctor once told me when I was trying to help an older person who loved to argue, your wasting your time arguing with them, cause in their mind, they think they are right, as much as you think you are right. As long as it,s not harmful to anyone, why not let them think that for their own well being and self worth ?
I think you've misunderstood the intent of this thread. There has been no arguing, and I have let him have his way all along, simply to keep the peace. My wife is the only one who knows how I feel about the situation, or at least she was until I created this thread. And the term "Stubborn Old Man" was not meant in a derogatory way, it comes from my wife who calls me the same thing, and was meant as more of a description than a label. He is older than me, but in this case, age has nothing to do with it.
He has been in charge of maintaining the driveway for over 10 years, and it only continues to get worse. I have to act or I may eventually be unable to use the driveway to get to my home. Besides, as you pointed out, he is getting older, and this is as much to take the burden (or some of it) off him, as it is to simply get the road fixed.