Four strikes in a day!!!

Boondox · Jul 8, 2003

I took a few days off to install electric poultry mesh fencing and to make a portable sheep shelter. My wife insisted on helping, though generally she complains so much about being used as a clamp that I've purchased more than enough clamps over the years to hold pretty much anything I might want to build.

So I asked her to hold a 12' 2x4 while I toenailed a support. WHAM! Right on the noggin the moment I knelt down. SLAM! My finger convulsed on the trigger of the framing nailer, which shot a 3.5" nail into the base of my left thumb. THUD! I leaped to my feet and met the other end of the 2x4. YOUCH! And then I jumped out of the shelter and twisted my ankle on a bit of scrap wood! /forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif /forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif /forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif

After removing the nail and discovering my thumb still worked, the head was clear, and the ankle would support my weight, I choked back all sorts of ungentlemanly comments and suggested she go into the house and search for some obscure tool I had misplaced months before. I finished the framing, and moved on to converting the electric fencing from battery power to 110VAC power.

It was a hot day -- in the nineties -- with humidity to match. After several hours I was dripping in sweat, straddling the fence making final adjustments to the positioning of the power supply when my wife, who had found the tool, came out of the house, saw the power was not plugged in, and helped me out by plugging it into the outlet in the garage. /forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif

Ever been hit in the crotch with 6000 volts!?!

I love my wife I love my wife I love my wife...

Pete

F350Lawman · Jul 8, 2003

And you think this was all an ACCIDENT....you foolish man /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif She's probably yucking it up with her girlfriends right now. Their husbands will have similar "accidents' today! /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

What you do, forget an anniversary??? You better go get that little lady a few dozen roses it m ight be cheaper and surely will be less painful /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

Give up while you still can!!! There is no dishonor in surrender.... well in this case anyway.

RobS · Jul 8, 2003

LOL big time Pete! Thanks for the laughs, I needed that to counteract the day I'm having here at work. In fact, if that's what taking a day off is like maybe being here isn't so bad.

Did you happen to notice the video camera in her hand during this whole ordeal? I'm sure you'll be a feature on America's Funniest Videos /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

fishman · Jul 8, 2003

Pete, that was beautifully written /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif Everyone at the office was wondering what I was laughing at.

I was laughing with you, honest! /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif

Hope you're o.k.

fivestring · Jul 8, 2003

Glad to hear you're ok. Now, where is a video camera when you need one! I mean, that was better than watching AFV where the guys all get whacked in the jimmies !!! /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
I think your wife planned it too... they play dumb, but... It's kinda like us telling them that we don't know how to do "inside" stuff !!!! /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif

19th_VA · Jul 8, 2003

Pete,

I nominate you for sainthood.

Not sure, but I think a jury of 12 men (your peers, right?) would call it self defense.

And I thought my wife was less than helpful!

You made me laugh despite the doldrums of gov't work.

Egon · Jul 8, 2003

It's clearly all your own fault Pete. You have used improperly trained help and must suffer the consequences.

That must of hurt!

Egon

Currmudgeon · Jul 8, 2003

This is getting very close to the story about the laborer, the barrel of bricks, and the gin wheel...

rbarker · Jul 8, 2003

( Ever been hit in the crotch with 6000 volts!?!)

I feel really guilty laughing this hard at someone else's misfortune! I hope you're all right but that was "milk out your nose" funny! /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Boondox · Jul 9, 2003

Thanks for the, erm, sympathy, guys! /forums/images/graemlins/crazy.gif

Next time I work on the fence I'll be sure to have the business end of the power cord in my field of view!

jimg · Jul 9, 2003

This has gotta be the funniest story Ive read in a while. Did this really happen? I esp like the last part when you were straddling the fence dripping wet and the power was applied. So, could you finish the story...Id like to know what happened after the ' and helped me out by plugging it into the outlet in the garage.' part. LOL!!!!!!!!! Im laughing SO hard right now!!!! Hey, if its any comfort I think Reader's Digest would pay you for this story. /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Inspector507 · Jul 9, 2003

Pete,
You could use something like this around with such a good "helper" plugging you in /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Soundguy · Jul 9, 2003

I don't feel so bad now... ( and by the way.. my wife doesn't even make a good clamp... usually she can't even hold the stuff i lift and ask her to brace... ).. anyway, the other day the wife broke a light buld in the chandelier.. asked be to get it out... I go get a chair and am digging the lamp base out with a screwdriver, when I ask for a flashlight.. so my wife turns on the lights... go figure...
It took a few seconds for the blank look to turn into understanding when she figured out what she did... oh well.. she looks nice anyway... ( incidentally.. my mom did this same thing to my father when i was about 4... I remember dad standing on the table, in the dark, asking what the ?@# she just did that for... almost deja vu.. )

But guys... we aren't alone... I think it is widespread.

At night i do some sound engineering and contract work, and I was in this club talking to this nice looking waitress.. how acted well like she had it together. I mentioned she should train for another job.. you know.. get out of the bar scene.. etc.. I asked if she was good with electronics.. then she told me this story ( honest.. this was just last night! )
She had just moved into her own apartment a while back, and one of the lamps had a loose socket, causing the light to flicker every now and then... she surmized that if she lined the lamp socket with aluminum foil, that would hold the lamp in securely.. and it did.. felt much better.. then she turned ont he lamp and the sparks flew.. she called her dad and asked what happened, and he um.. well pretty much asked here what was she thinking... go figure...

Soundguy

Golfgar4 · Jul 9, 2003

( I was in this club talking to this nice looking waitress.. )

You ARE going to tell us that she was blonde, aren't you!? /forums/images/graemlins/crazy.gif /forums/images/graemlins/ooo.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

fivestring · Jul 9, 2003

"You ARE going to tell us that she was blonde, aren't you!? "

Lemme guess... she has since moved because she heard that most accidents happen within 10 miles of home.....
/forums/images/graemlins/smirk.gif

dmccarty · Jul 9, 2003

GREAT STORY PETE!

Good thing I had finished a cup of coffee otherwise it would
have been all over the place!!! /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

My coworkers no longer look at me when I start laughing.
They pretty much ignore me at this stage!

So what did you do/say to your wife after she lit you up?

Later,
Dan