Helping a young lady.

[RSKY]

Guess I'm just an old softy.

When my youngest was in middle school, fifteen years ago, there was this cute little girl who spent the night with her. I didn't know the whole story but over the next two-three years she ended up spending three to five nights every week with us. Even during the summer. Daughter would get a phone call and come in and say "$$$$ needs us to pick her up", and we would. If we were going somewhere we had three kids instead of two. Going out to eat, there were five instead of four. Family dinner, she was there and learned everybody in our families and they learned her. Nobody asked questions. And I never asked questions and as far as I know my wife didn't either. The daughter just said that she needed some time away from home. I knew the parents had divorced and the mother remarried and divorced again but that was all I knew. I found out a year ago that if I had known what was going on I would probably, and my wife certainly, be in jail right now.

In the middle of their sophomore year the mother moved four hours away. The dad stayed here. At my youngest's wedding the father approached me and told me that if it hadn't been for my daughter he didn't know what would have happened to his daughter. He actually stood there and cried over his only child's life.

Anyway, we have two natural daughters and another young lady who views us as surrogate parents.

So, over the years later when she would drive down to see her dad she would spend nearly as much time with us. The dad died in 2013 and his house has sat here for a year and a half full of furniture and music equipment. The young lady, now near thirty years of age, had so much on her plate, a successful career, a sick mother, a sister in trouble, that she just couldn't take care of business. At my daughter's request I called her up a couple weeks ago and instead of offering advice I TOLD her what she needed to get her butt in gear and do. "Yes Dad", was the reply. So she drove down here and the house was cleaned out over Friday night and Saturday. Two loads to a consignment store, three loads donated, and two SUVs and a U-Haul trailer loaded for transport to her home. Spent Sunday driving nearly five hours (14.5 mpg with the trailer instead of the usual 19-21 mpg) to her home. Unloaded and spent Sunday night with another friend. The girl hugged us both and cried. Drove home Monday morning and did some more work on her house. She is hiring professional cleaners and will have it in real estate in a month. Sale of the small house will help her pay off her own and give her a nest egg for the rest of her life.

Just bragging about doing something for somebody that cannot do anything for us in return. We won't accept any payment from her for our help, no more than we would from one of our kids. Makes me proud because of her education and her position in a thriving business in a large municipal area.

Made me feel good about the world and I just wanted to share. Sometimes help given to somebody in trouble rewards you only with a hug and an "I love you" but that makes it all worth while. Don't want any attaboys from anybody over this story. Not the purpose. Most of us here are older. Just think about being twenty-something with no family to offer advice or help and if you see a young adult struggling offer help and DO IT without asking for or accepting any reward. Make the world a better place.

It will make you feel better too.

RSKY

 

[murphy1244]

Wow! You just made my day. Thanks. What a dam good family you have!

 

[2LaneCruzer]

Reaffirms my faith in humanity. May God Bless you and your family.

 

[ovrszd]

My parents helped several kids during my growing up years. I still have two "Brothers" that lived with us for a couple years because their families were so dysfunctional. I never saw my parents ask anything from those kids beyond living by our household rules.

I have two living biological Sons and two "Honorary" Sons as my Mom would call them.

I spent 22 years as a First Sergeant of an Army Company. 3 of those years Deployed. Some of my Soldiers still communicate regularly with me. A couple have Christmas with us every year. I've listened to dozens of stories of grief from those Soldiers while Deployed, family problems, money problems, etc.

Yesterday a good friend of mine came to my shop and handed me an envelope and asked me to hang on to it for him. I said okay, I'll put it in my safe. He said don't you want to know what it is? I said not necessary. He said it's my Will and Testament concerning the disposition of my Corporations and you should know that so you can take it to my lawyer if something happens to me. I said no problem.

Now, bear with me, here's my take on these stories and especially RSKY's.

I believe God places things in my life daily, sometimes hourly. If I respond in a caring, giving way more will follow. If I respond less graciously, less will follow. The more gracious I am in handling these needs the more I am rewarded. You see, the intent of these things isn't just to help the other person, although they will receive help from you. The intent is to grow me spiritually. The intent and ongoing result of RSKY's life changing incident is still manifesting itself. Everyone involved has been changed and is benefitting. Some will respond more graciously, some less graciously. Their rewards will be reflected in their own decisions.

Sometimes when you meet people you can feel their Angels. They might not even know they are there. But I know. This has nothing to do with their personal belief in a higher being. This has to do with MY belief in a higher being. Now, I'll get a bit personal, but he'll understand. I've never met Murph. I don't recall him ever proclaiming his faith. But he has Angels. I feel them. RSKY has just told us about his.

 

[murphy1244]

You know my wife says I have fleas... I was taught to do what you can do and move on.

 

[FTG-05]

Guess I'm just an old softy.

When my youngest was in middle school, fifteen years ago, there was this cute little girl who spent the night with her. I didn't know the whole story but over the next two-three years she ended up spending three to five nights every week with us. Even during the summer. Daughter would get a phone call and come in and say "$$$$ needs us to pick her up", and we would. If we were going somewhere we had three kids instead of two. Going out to eat, there were five instead of four. Family dinner, she was there and learned everybody in our families and they learned her. Nobody asked questions. And I never asked questions and as far as I know my wife didn't either. The daughter just said that she needed some time away from home. I knew the parents had divorced and the mother remarried and divorced again but that was all I knew. I found out a year ago that if I had known what was going on I would probably, and my wife certainly, be in jail right now.

[snip]

It will make you feel better too.

RSKY

What did you find out if I may ask?

 

[TripleR]

Great examples of the many really good people out there, maybe not as many as we would like, but certainly more than you know. I worked in some counties with poverty designations and was impressed by the number of families raising children to whom they were not related. Some not familiar with the area might make comments about families having too many kids.

Now I accept if there had been more responsible parents, there wouldn't be a need for others to step up, but it was heartening to see so many willing to take these children in.

 

[RSKY]

Sorry, no can tell. Still don't know the whole story and don't want to. All I will say is that the biological dad did everything possible to protect his daughter. At the father's funeral last year the mother hugged my daughter and cried for a long time.

My point may have been missed by some of you. What we did this past weekend was nothing to us. We are retired and we just took a weekend road trip to visit some friends. Might have spent a hundred dollars or so. Met some nice people. Had a good time. Caused one friend to be an hour late for work because she wouldn't stop talking. Helped out a young lady. My wife sat and talked for an hour with her half sister who promised to come visit. We had fun. But to the young lady it was a HUGE relief to get done what we got done. She simply had nobody to tell her what to do and no experience to do it herself.

As I said above I am bragging on ourselves a little but also trying to tell others to help young adults when you see them struggling. I had relatives to step in if I needed advice. My daughters have other relatives to help them. Heck, my granddaughters have been babysat by a great-great-aunt. How often does that happen.

Just spread the help around.

RSKY

 

[tractorshopper]

I love stories like this. My mother always took in what I came to refer to as strays. While she's gone for a year and a half now, some of these strays still join us for family Christmas and routine family get togethers from another state even. Others have the finest memories of her and her impact on them, which is really God's impact carried out through man. The impact you make in these young or any lives isn't just in theirs and yours; it continues on for generations in ways we'll never be around to find out about. I am in total agreement with Richard's take on this. May I live up to the opportunities.

 

[TripleR]

Just spread the help around.

RSKY

Agreed, we have a couple of honorary daughters and several part time sons over the years and passed it on to our children. At an early age we began the tradition of "Adopt a Family" for Christmas and personally delivered the food and gifts. Our kids loved it though our daughter remarked to school mates, "We're the poorest family in Dexter" because we often told them, "no, we just can't spare the money". She laughs about it today.

Our kids have volunteered time and money and occasionally a home to others over the years.

We only had one bad experience when a young man stole a pistol, cash and prescription medicine.

We are helping a couple financially now and have been for some time; when they were able they did the same for others, really nice people.