How to "relax" and "let it go"

[tlj87]

I am one of those types where everything has to be just right. Can't go to bed at night with dirty dishes in the sink. Must sweep up every last piece of debris around the wood rack after bringing wood in in the evening, and after each loading of the wood stove. And, it all has to be done NOW.

I go nuts in the winter thinking about all of the projects that I have to work on in the spring. Now that spring is here, I fret about the weather and when it will stop raining long enough to get something done.

It's tough to take an actual vacation because I think about what I "should" be doing back at home. I use about half of my vacation days to actually work on projects. The other half are actual vacation or a little padding around the holidays.

I do well at work (both jobs), but I find myself drifting off thinking about all of this other stuff sometimes.

While there are a few projects that actually do need to be done, a lot of it isn't time sensitive. I have found that I rush through some projects, not doing the quality of work that I am capable of because I'm in a hurry to move on to the next thing.

The little bark pieces next to the wood rack can wait until the whole floor gets swept in a day or two. Those two glasses in the sink can get washed after breakfast tomorrow.

I don't know how my wife tolerates it!

Is anyone else as ridiculous as I am? If yes, how do you tell your mind to "SLOW DOWN" to relax and enjoy life a bit?

 

[bcp]

“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.” ― Mark Twain

“One of the very worst uses of time is to do something very well that need not to be done at all.” Brian Tracy

“I love deadlines. Especially the whooshing sound they make as they pass by.” ― Douglas Adams

“Why, some of the work that I have by me now has been in my possession for years and years, and there isn’t a finger-mark on it. I take great pride in my work; I take it down now and then and dust it. No man keeps his work in a better state of preservation than I do.” ― Jerome K. Jerome

 

[Thomas]

Gotta stop and smell the roses as they say.

 

[Citydude]

I have the same affliction and used to cram each day with a to do list. I've learned that it's OK to set down, relax and read a book or heaven forbid, take a cat nap and the list can be done over time. You just need to give yourself permission to smell the roses. Your wife has. Take her advice.

 

[pmsmechanic]

Here's some practical things from my own life. It's about my kids but I use it in other things too. I like to have stuff just so so. I could get my nose quite out of joint if my kids didn't behave in the way that I expected them too. One day I just told myself to relax and if what the kids were doing wouldn't make a difference in 20 years than it wasn't worth getting excited about. I slowly started to apply this to the rest of my life as well and it's made me a much less anxious person. I actually have time now to go to town for coffee with the neighbors. Not everything has to get done! So if the floor doesn't get swept or the dishes done etc. What difference is it going to make in 20 years? Are you going to remember in 20 years that such and such didn't get done on April 3 2015.

My kids are all gone now but I often tried to ask myself the question. What do I want my kids to remember? Do I want them to remember that everything was perfect or do I want them to remember that I had time for them when they needed it.

 

[ovrszd]

I call that OCD. Had a good friend that suffered with that. He recognized it and tried to control his irrational acts in public. If he walked into a room full of people and there was anything laying on the floor, trash, pencil, paper clip, whatever, he had no choice but pick it up. I carried a huge burden for him about this condition. We would talk about it occasionally but there was never any relief. He died two weeks ago from a heart attack. He was 54.

 

[Citydude]

I call that OCD. Had a good friend that suffered with that. He recognized it and tried to control his irrational acts in public. If he walked into a room full of people and there was anything laying on the floor, trash, pencil, paper clip, whatever, he had no choice but pick it up. I carried a huge burden for him about this condition. We would talk about it occasionally but there was never any relief. He died two weeks ago from a heart attack. He was 54.

Sorry for the loss of your friend. That had to be hard to watch.

 

[ovrszd]

Sorry for the loss of your friend. That had to be hard to watch.

Thank you. He worked hard at controlling it. In the middle of a conversation with him you would see his expression change. His mind was already on a different subject and anything you said beyond that point was not heard. What a way to go thru life.

 

[sseelhoff]

I am one of those types where everything has to be just right. Can't go to bed at night with dirty dishes in the sink. Must sweep up every last piece of debris around the wood rack after bringing wood in in the evening, and after each loading of the wood stove. And, it all has to be done NOW.

I go nuts in the winter thinking about all of the projects that I have to work on in the spring. Now that spring is here, I fret about the weather and when it will stop raining long enough to get something done.

It's tough to take an actual vacation because I think about what I "should" be doing back at home. I use about half of my vacation days to actually work on projects. The other half are actual vacation or a little padding around the holidays.

I do well at work (both jobs), but I find myself drifting off thinking about all of this other stuff sometimes.

While there are a few projects that actually do need to be done, a lot of it isn't time sensitive. I have found that I rush through some projects, not doing the quality of work that I am capable of because I'm in a hurry to move on to the next thing.

The little bark pieces next to the wood rack can wait until the whole floor gets swept in a day or two. Those two glasses in the sink can get washed after breakfast tomorrow.

I don't know how my wife tolerates it!

Is anyone else as ridiculous as I am? If yes, how do you tell your mind to "SLOW DOWN" to relax and enjoy life a bit?

I could have written this. I can't relax until work is done. Work is never done. I take my computer on vacations so I can answer email and work on reports.

If I am not at the computer during the day, I am doing a project outside for SWMBO; If I am not outside in the evening or on weekends doing a project, I am inside on the computer.

 

[rekees4300]

Stress is a silent KILLER! You just have to realize that things which seem important really aren't.

"Stress: Portrait of a Killer" Examines How Stress Can Kill You