My tractor has two factory remotes, a dealer added remote mounted on the fender, and a BH loop. The system goes in this order: pump, loader, dealer remote, BH loop, factory remotes (valves mounted on the transmission and flow directly into the 3pt), 3pt, tank. A lot of that is driven by how easily it is to make the connections.
That stuff I wrote about the T port on your new valve being rated for system pressure is for connecting it through the BH loop. Normal valves have one input, two work ports and two outputs. One output is power beyond, which goes to the next valve in the series. The other is the T port which goes to the tank. If you're using a valve without a PB so the T port takes all the output, the T port has to be able to handle the pressure caused by a valve farther down the line opening it's work ports and doing work.
With either a four port or five port valve you can put it anywhere in the chain. Usually it would go between the loader valve and the 3pt, because the PB and T ports on the 3pt are inside the transmission case where you can't get to them (and the 3pt valve is probably not going to handle the pressure of a valve after it). And having the loader first means it has priority, which is probably what you want. In practice it's often tough to get two things to operate at the same time with our simple hydraulic systems.