Ok I cleaned out the tank, replaced the fuel filter, ran the last of the gas out of the lines, and it was running just fine.
In retrospect I had a couple of clues I didn't realize until after the fact.
1. The water sensor fault never came up, so water should have been my second guess, not my first.
2. The exhaust smelled funny, sorta like it does before auto regen, but stronger, and burned the eyes. Strangely, never smoked, until that little puff at the end of the video I posted.
This happened because during the Texas Freezepocalypse a few months back I filled a diesel can with gas because I didn't have enough gas cans to keep the generator running around the clock. I remember putting zip ties on the handle to identify that diesel can as having gas in it, but maybe I only remember planning to do it rather than actually following through. Or maybe someone cut them off (less likely).
Regardless I should have checked the fuel before putting it in, as one always should do, I didn't, and that's why this happened. Lesson learned. Do the things you know should do. I got lucky (I think, fingers crossed) nothing catastrophic happened.
It ran for 30 minutes just now, seems fine. I tried to force a regen blast out whatever crap the gas left behind in the DPF system, but no luck, it won't let me force regen unless it reads at least 30% soot rate.