Letter to Sec. of Agriculture

[Wal]

Honorable Secretary of Agriculture
Washington, D.C.

Dear Sir;

My friend, Ed Peterson, over at Wells Iowa,
received a check for $1,000 from the government for not
raising hogs. So, I want to go into the "not raising
hogs" business next year.

What I want to know is, in your opinion, what is the
best kind of farm not to raise hogs on, and what is the
best breed of hogs not to raise? I want to be sure that
I approach this endeavor in keeping with all
governmental policies. I would prefer not to raise
razorbacks, but if that is not a good breed not to
raise, then I will just as gladly not raise Yorkshires
or Poland Chinas.

As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be in
keeping an accurate inventory of how many hogs I haven't
raised.

My friend, Peterson, is very joyful about the future of
the business. He has been raising hogs for twenty years
or so, and the best he ever made on them was $422 in
1968, until this year when he got your check for $1000
for not raising hogs.

If I get $1000 for not raising 50 hogs, will I get $2000
for not raising 100 hogs? I plan to operate on a small
scale at first, holding myself down to about 4000 hogs
not raised, which will mean about $80,000 the first
year. Then I can afford an airplane.

Now another thing, these hogs I will not raise will not
eat 100,000 bushels of corn. I understand that you also
pay farmers for not raising corn and wheat. Will I
qualify for payments for not raising wheat and corn not
to feed the 4000 hogs I am not going to raise?

Also, I am considering the "not milking cows" business,
so send me any information you have on that too.

In view of these circumstances, you understand that I
will be totally unemployed and plan to file for
unemployment and food stamps.
Be assured you will have my vote in the coming election.

 

[ByuBill]

I know that this is posted in OT&JFF but if you really want to see how many of your friends and neighbors (or fellow TBNers) are doing almost the very same thing. Check out this site. <A target="_blank" HREF=http://ewg.org/farm/>Click Here</A>

 

[rf33]

Interesting site Byubill, in my area, it seems that most of the subsidies are going to the dairies... I wonder if that data includes all of the federally funded programs, or only select programs. I also would be interested to know how many hours that site took to put together (I would be thousands)

 

[poorboy]

Dear Wal

Being an American myself, I also want safe food that I can rely on being there for my family. I also want this food produced in a way that is not harmful to the environment and the people who share the same space. I would also like for this food to remain cheap and in plentiful supply. Also the fact that the government uses this cheap food supply to secure relationships with other countries to provide for our safety does seem to make sense at times.

These farmers, especially family owned farms don’t always enjoy having dictated to them what to grow and how much to grow. This is especially true when these people have so much tied up in machinery and labor. Yes labor, people who are self employed must keep up insurance and as many other things you and I take for granted. This is above operating cost and land payments. Yes, all those beautiful acres that we drive by with our windows up and our air conditioners on in case there is some offending smells on the way to our rural subdivision because land is so much cheaper here.

After all of this expense and everything is going good, a drought or a flood occurs, to you or I our lawns dry up or our drive washes a little. To the farmer, less income with the expenses still there. Good year, over production and the prices go down and the government says you can’t grow as much next year. Ten years later the farmer quits gets a job and drives by farm with window down to remind himself of the good times of the past. Problem is the farm is soon built up in houses because the taxes are too high to make it profitable to farm.

About half of the livestock is raised by these family farmers, want to guess who raises the other half. Not by the people who are concerned about you or me. How many of could go out and buy a farm and the machinery and maintain our current standard of living? A lot of those farmers are still in the business because of the depression fear that would occur if they gave up the farm that had been in the family for five or six generations. Once they are out of it those farms are gone forever. There is no restarting these food factories once things are improving. Just too much start up costs.

No problem, we will just buy from elsewhere, like we do with our oil. Those other countries can produce it for a much better price and we don’t have to put up with those inconviences of neighbors cows and those hog lots. What they do to their land and their practices probably won’t effect us for a very long time. Plus if we hook onto one of those icebergs breaking off…..

Wal to be honest it is a little of a touchy subject here since I am one of these family farmers who is the sixth generation to live and work here. I also teach with my wife so my boys can grow up here. I doubt they will be able to make here though. The government tobacco program is on the way out which regulated the amount of tobacco grown each year. Give you 30 percent increase and next year take it away plus more. I am sure there is abuse in the system there always is. But that thousand bucks your neighbor got was not pure profit and was probably an insult to boot.

Respectfully,
Patrick
Tired wet farmer

 

[Wal]

Dear Poorboy,

Please be assured that I did not write that letter. My signature appears at the end because it does on all my posts. It did not occur to me that it would appear as though I wrote the letter myself. The letter was just a "funny" that someone else sent me via e-mail. I have great respect for family farmers and wish them all the luck in the world. The "funny" part of the letter, to me at least, was the concept of getting paid to not do something which you were not going to do anyway.

Sincerely,

 

[poorboy]

Wal,
Sorry about my reaction, I had one heck of a tough week and I was watching the weather channel and the river raising on my hay crop. Just now noticed in was in the just for fun section. I guess I was a little emotional at the time and sorry about the smart alec replies.

This site is a very important place to get your mind off of things in the outside world. Seems like when we give in things just snowball into the farther the worse. Just like my reply.

Patrick

 

[Wal]

Patrick,

I hope things are starting to dry out for you. We haven't had rain now for three days around here /w3tcompact/icons/shocked.gif, and the rivers are on their way down. Not supposed to rain for at least a couple more either /w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif. Where are you located, anyhow? Your bio's kind of sparse.

Good luck,