UPDATE:
I don't know if this is good news for me, or not. I used my tractor today to clean up the ice and snow, and was thinking about the relpies I got to my post, so I thought I'd try it again. First I tried engaging the mid PTO with tranny in nuetral, clutch in an me in the seat. The lever went into the engaged position WITHOUT GRINDING!!! WOW. But now the rear PTO wouldn't go into the engaged position. It moved almost to the engaged position and then the grinding started. That's the opposite of what it did before. What the h__? And even though the mid PTO went to the engaged position, it wasn't engaged (turning).
Something I hadnt mentioned before is that when I bought the tractor the bracket under the seat that you prop up to allow you to operate the rear PTO without being on the seat, was all bent up. That bracket holds down a contact switch when you're in the seat. The switch needs to be compressed for starting and running. I took the bracket out and modified the switch position to work without it. I'm now wondering if that switch is partially bad. It doesn't look unusual, but it and the associated wiring are in the loop for operating both PTO's. (I wonder if I'm not correct on the switch function? Thinking out loud here.)
I think a good session with my volt/ohm meter is next. But I think it's probably good news that the problem may not be with the clutches or something mechanical.
Thanks for the help.