I want to preface my answeres by saying I have never worked on this model machine but pretty sure it has some similarity to my current Mitsubishi tractor. I also am assuming you have checked hydraulic fluid level and cleaned any hydraulic screens or filters prior to posting here.
I also should have included two other possible causes....you could have a bad pump or you could have condensation in your hydraulic fluid that has frozen and is clogging a screen or filter. Have you checked the screen/strainer or hydraulic filter? If not, did your issue begin to happen during freezing temps after the tractor had been sitting in freezing temps?
OK, now to answer your questions:
1. Relief valves usually stick open because of a piece of debris. The valve has to be disassembled and cleaned. I am not sure if your relief valve is in the control valve or on the left side of the hydraulic housing like on my tractor.
2. The piston orings should be able to be replaced by removing the lift cylinder head and pulling the piston out. The head is the plate that holds the flow control valve ( speed control) for the 3 point hitch ( is located below the seat/ between your legs while seated).
3. I would start with the linkage and make certain everything moves or is attached like it should. The control valve would need to be disassembled, cleaned and any torn/worn orings replaced.
4. I feel pretty comfortable saying it will be located under the hydraulic housing cover ( the large case that holds the flow control valve on the front/ rock shaft for 3 point lift) on the rear.
If you don't have any manuals, look at the parts diagrams I linked in my first post. I would also highly recommend buying a service manual!!! An absolute bargain for $20 and the best money you will ever spend on your tractor!
Service Manual - Ih-s-235 International Harvester Case IH 235 | eBay