Old People Football

   / Old People Football #1  

Joe_W

Silver Member
Joined
Apr 25, 2001
Messages
111
Location
Greenville, Ohio
Tractor
2001 Kubota B2910
An old man and his wife have gone to bed. After laying there a few
minutes the old man farts and says, "seven points." His wife rolls over and
says, "What in the world was that?" The old man replied, "It's fart
football." A few minutes later the wife let's one go and says "touchdown,
tie score." After about five minutes the old man farts again and says,
"touchdown, I'm ahead 14-7." Not to be outdone the wife rips another one
and says, "touchdown, tie score." Five seconds go by and she lets out a
squeaker and says "field goal, I lead 17-14." Now the pressure is on and
the old man refuses to get beat by a woman so he strains real hard but to no
avail. Realizing a defeat is totally unacceptable he gives it everything he
has but instead of farting he poops the bed. The wife looks and says, "What
the hell was that?" The old man replied, "Halftime...switch sides."


Joe W.
 
   / Old People Football #2  
/w3tcompact/icons/laugh.gif cute /w3tcompact/icons/laugh.gif
 
   / Old People Football #3  
very cute. happened to me once/w3tcompact/icons/frown.gif. i lost
 
   / Old People Football #4  
One of the guys that works for me had a similar incident while hunting deer this year. He decided to 'score a touchdown' before climbing up into his tree stand. Well, suffice it to say, he encountered a slight delay getting to his tree stand when, instead of 'scoring a touchdown', he 'launched a torpedo'. /w3tcompact/icons/shocked.gif After he cleaned up, 5 minutes into the start of the season, he bags a 160 pound buck (would have been a record for the county - if he had it officially weighed)! Before he can climb down, he gets a doe (PA had a combined season this year)! We have tried to convince him to market his own, natural brand of deer lure. /w3tcompact/icons/eyes.gif
 
   / Old People Football #5  
My great-uncle has some good words to live by; relating to this story I'm sure he'd say this axiom, "Never trust a fart".
 

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