Roakill Surprise

[Anonymous Poster]

Let me preface this by saying that there is nothing funny about an animal getting run over in the road. It's something that we have all learned to live with as a species that zips around at upwards of fifty miles an hour almost everywhere we go.

I guess all of us have had it happen. A squirrel or a raccoon will suddenly, at the very moment you are passing by, decide to test his skills at outrunning or out maneuvering a three thousand pound speeding vehicle, and there's really nothing you can do, short of causing an accident but grit your teeth and just try to forget about it.

I saw the squirrel the minute we turned off the dirt road onto the hard road, but I wasn't fixin' to say anything, because my daughter Jenny was with me, even though I immediately had to choke back a giggle.

Jenny my twelve year old, is very sensistive about these things. Every morning on the way to school it's 'ohhhh......poor armadillo.....poor raccoon....poor possum.' She has a definate dislike for buzzards and even when the buzzards are standing on the side of the road not doing a dang thing wrong, she will stick her tongue out at them. This time, however, was just a liitle bit different.

"Mama....I want you to LOOK at that squirrel!"

"I see it. I saw it right away, but I wasn't going to say anything." Already defending myself even though I hadn't done anything wrong.....yet.

When she made that 'huh!' sound that is usually her prelude to an all out laugh fest, despite the sadness of the loss of the poor animal, I knew that I was not as cold and jaded and unsympathetic as I thought I was. If a twelve year old could see the humor, a very sensitive twelve year old, then I knew there was hope for me.

This squirrel had been hit and was mashed as flat as the proverbial pancake. I mean FLAT. All except one thing. His tail was standing straight up in the air, all twelve inches of it, rigid as a poker, with just the tip of it dangling down, looking for all the world like a flag of surrender.

"That's the weirdest thing I ever saw!" Jenny said, trying hard not to laugh, but clearly struggling with herself.

Her eyes were wide, and a smile played at the corners of her mouth. I didn't remind her that she had only been on the earth twelve years and hadn't seen everything yet, why bother, because I hadn't ever seen anything like it before either. One of us had to break the ice.

"Kinda looks like he ran out in the road, saw the car coming, and said
"I surrender.....I surren....!" Thump. "

Giggle giggle.

"Or maybe that's what a squirrel's tail does when their last thought is ...'oh crap!' "

That was all it took. She bent over, put her hands over her mouth and giggled until her face was red as a beet.

"You out to be ashamed of yourself, laughing at that poor old squirrel." I scolded her.

Then the giggles were replaced by out right laughter that went on for several minutes. I just sat there and enjoyed her laughter, waiting for her conscience to kick in. Finally it did.

"Ohh.....poor squirrel."

I guess that's what they refer to as morbid humor. I don't think she will ever look at a run over squirrel again without saying..."remember that squirrel with the tail?"

I still can't figure out what would have caused this odd scene. Maybe my 'oh crap' theory has some substance.

 

[Egon]

We've found the best road kill is two pass Goodyear in late fall. Keps well on the road and no sand and salt to contend with. Makes for great stew.

Egon

 

[Taylortractornut]

Wierd story but true, My dad worked with a guy building roads as a foreman and this other subforeman invited us over fro a fish fry, well when we walked into the kitchn there was a cat about 1 inch thick that had been severly flattened and dried, it was nailed o the wall and repainted. THe foreman told us it had ben flattentd on a road job and that noone would move itjust kept rolling it with the 20 ton asphault rollers. It made me sick. That was about 9 years ago. The other day dad an i were going to look at a small backhoe job i bid on and at the end of the driveway saw a coyote in the perfect flat on the run run position about an inch thic, Dad an i both said at the same time without looking at each other **** i hope waylon and sheila dont see that lol.

 

[Anonymous Poster]

I think it might be just a litle bit 'deliverancey' to save these little souveniers. But that's just me. Lol!

 

[wroughtn_harv]

We'd been running over the bridge in Carpenter's Bluff to cross over into Oklahoma for lunch. On the way back to the job the other day we saw a small turtle crossing the highway.

We pulled over to insure it got across the road in safety.

Bud was driving and told me to stay in the truck while he moved the turtle to theother side of the road. He'd just started walking back towards the turtle when some heroe in an Excursion swerved to intentionally hit the turtle.

Bud turned around and strode back to the truck. We sat there in silence for a minute before continuing. Some things human beings do are just hard to understand.

 

[Anonymous Poster]

I'm glad you brought that up. I never did understand how people run over turtles. I mean you can see the bump in the road for a good distance, and it's not like they 'run out' in front of you. There's plenty of time to react. I guess like you say it's just plain meanness.

On the lighter side, I tried to rescue a turtle once. It was an ugly thing, with a long pointed nose. I went up there all...oh...come on boy...I'll get you out of the road. The dern thing hissed like a bobcat and JUMPED at me. My daughter was sitting in the truck and she just busted out laughing. I got back in the truck. Turtles are not supposed to jump.

"We're just going to have to go around that one." I said.

 

[Bird]

</font><font color="blue" class="small">( Some things human beings do are just hard to understand. )</font>

Now that's a fact. I've seen people do the same thing; never could quite understand that. I've "heard" that a turtle or terrapin shell can cut a tire; don't know whether that's true or not, but there's been times I almost wished it was.

 

[wroughtn_harv]

<font color="blue">The dern thing hissed like a bobcat and JUMPED at me.</font>

Just be glad it didn't catch you. That pointed nose and bobcat with his tail in a bind attitude sounds like a snapper to me. /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif

 

[wroughtn_harv]

You know Bird that does sound like turn about being fair play.

I suspect they do it because their *** life is so sorry.

 

[Anonymous Poster]

Bird...I've heard the same thing....so maybe there's something to it.

Harv....I think someone later told me that it was some kind of sand turtle. I'll see if I can find a picture of it.

 

[Anonymous Poster]

Here it is, it's a soft shell turtle. Cute huh?

 

[Bird]

When I was a kid I ate a couple of those soft shelled turtles; made good turtle soup.

 

[Anonymous Poster]

Did they jump at you too? I feel pretty sure this thing would have chased me back to the truck had I not backed off. I still can't get over this jumping thing. Lol!

 

[Bird]

Nope, never knew of a soft shelled turtle to be aggressive, but guess any of them could be if they felt threatened. We sometimes caught them on fish hooks when fishing for catfish. The first time I made turtle soup, I had two small turtles I'd caught; not much bigger than saucers and they made good soup and the meat was good. The next time, I caught one that weighed 8 pounds. The soup was good, but the meat was too tough to chew /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif so I never tried it again.

 

[Taylortractornut]

Yeah it made me sick to see the cat pancake all painted upo with a bow on its neck. The same fella had a hal lab half Pitbull mix and a pit bull that didnt get along he brainstormed and chained them together with a 2 foot chain.
Harv Know what you mean about the trying to save a turtle and someone swerver and run over it. I used to drive an 84 S10 to work oneday i saw a big mud turtle in the center line i gripped the wheel put my welding glove on, threw the door open and scooped him up five miles per hour hung out of a truck its a funny sight. I guess i learned from my brother we were driving down a 2 lan paved highway when we saw a spot moving acroos the centerline We had a D9 Cat on the back of the lowboy got stopped and looked at the spec. It was a tumblebug rolling this 2 inch manure ball across the road. When he got pat the crown it went quickly. My brothers worker look at him funny and all my brtoher said is all us earthmovers need stick togtherlol.
I know we should let nature take its course but like the time i found some near dead coyote pups at the landfill where i work, I couldnt shoot them didnt want to see them starve or die from the mange, so we fed them and put them in a coyote pen and got there mange stopped. I had folks here shoot at them an there excuse was there killin cattle, The next day the game warden had pictures of the farmers 2 rottweilers killing goats and a calf.

 

[RichZ]

Cindi, if that turtle was a soft shell turtle it was harmless, but the hiss a turtle makes is alarming. The hiss is actually the air being forced out of their lungs by their bodies being compressed as they move in their shell. Most turtles can spring their legs out quickly for one quick jump, but that's it.

The exception is snapping turtles. Their bottom shell is much smaller than that of most turtles, allowing them much more movement. They can run and jump, and they're fast! Very fast!! For short bursts that is.

Around here, in upstate New York, in early summer, the female snappers come out of ponds, lakes and streams to lay their eggs in sand and gravel. They're big turtles, they can be one to two feet long. They often cross roads, and as you notice, people will run them over. My wife and I keep shovels in our trucks all year. During the winter, we use them in case we get stuck in a snowdrift. During the summer, we use them to push or pull female snapping turtles out of harm's way. You gotta be careful with them, if you get too close theyll strike at you like a snake. But they don't deserve to be squashed by cars.

Interestingly, though, when they're in water, they're pretty harmless. I've even stepped on them wadding in our creek, thought I was standing on a rock, when the rock suddenly started moving! /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif The turtle could've taken off several of my toes, but they just move away. They're not scared in water, because they're graceful swimmers, but on land they're clummsy and defensive. Can't blame them for that!

 

[Anonymous Poster]

I imagine they feel pretty vulnerable. if we humans have caught on to the fact that they are pretty much fair game in the road, no reason to asume they haven't.