Stock Market Report

[ShenandoahJoe]

From The Onion

ADR
Kubota Corporation
Rose $1.44 tp $41.40 (up 3.6%)

Shares of the farm-equipment maker climbed on reports of lawn mowers made by rival John Deere losing their brakes, sending screaming suburbanites into trees and houses at speeds of up to 4.8 miles per hour.

 

[Baby Grand]

Gotta love The Onion.

 

[Toolguy]

That's funny!