united you stand

daedong · Aug 31, 2004

I often watch your ABC NBH, and today i fell of the couch laughing at this
SUSIE GHARIB: And finally, in the "every little bit helps the budget" department comes the story of York, Pennsylvania. Last week, a York city councilman questioned how the cash-strapped city would be able to close a huge $25 million gap in its fire and police pensions. The councilman quipped that the city couldn`t even afford toilet paper. On Sunday, someone dropped off a case of toilet paper at city hall. The toilet paper was given to the public works department and will be used in city buildings. Paul, York`s mayor says he`s pleased the public is paying such close attention to the city`s challenges.

BB_TX · Sep 1, 2004

I hope they included instructions on how to use it. Watching some city governments and city councils, I doubt they would know which end to use it on. /forums/images/graemlins/crazy.gif

Tractors4u · Sep 1, 2004

I work for the government and it has been my experience that management would hire a high dollar consulting firm to come in and tell us the most efficient way to use the toilet paper.

Bob_Skurka · Sep 1, 2004

Brent, I am under the impression that before they hire the high dollar con$ulting firm that first they would delegate the potential uses of the toilet paper to a special study commission, which would then appoint a sub-committee to research con$ulting firms. The whole process usually takes about a year before the sub-committee receives 3 bids, all of which must come from union shops that guarantee to pay prevailing living wage rates. After that, the sub-comittee reports back to the commission which then revises the cost estimate of the con$ulting firm upward to account for cost of living increases, before reporting back to the town council for final debate.

I suspect the toilet paper will be paired up with some "Elmer's Glue Sticks" and distributed to the clerical staff at the town hall as "make your own post-it-note paper" sometime in early to mid 2006.

Junkman · Sep 1, 2004

Easy solution.... close the schools and give each school aged student a $7500 voucher to go to a private school. They would still save money over what it "actually" costs the town to run the school system. As for the toilet paper, the school system probably pays as much for one roll as the entire donated case costs. Am I being too harsh on the school systems??? /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif /forums/images/graemlins/mad.gif

fivestring · Sep 1, 2004

( I work for the government and it has been my experience that management would hire a high dollar consulting firm to come in and tell us the most efficient way to use the toilet paper. )

And spend $100,000.00 on the study!!!! /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

Tractors4u · Sep 1, 2004

$100K is probably cheap. Our management had a consultant come to our department to tell us how to better perform our job. They started out by asking us what we do, how we do it?, etc, etc. Each time they made a suggested change we countered with why we did it a certain way. We did throw a few ideas their way though. Of course in the end they had to go to our management with something. They gave them our ideas. Management thought they were brilliant. Brilliant, the same things we had been telling them!

BIGUN · Sep 1, 2004

The consulting firm our company hired to determine why equipment wasn’t getting repaired like it used to came up with a good one. It wasn’t because 2/3 of the mechanics had been laid off and the budget had been cut by as much. It was because we need to fill out and hang green cards on the equipment that needs attention and when a mechanic walks by and sees it, he will say, “Hey, that card has been hanging there a pretty long time; maybe I need to work on it.” /forums/images/graemlins/crazy.gif Ha! If you believe that I’ve got a brand new BX23 sitting out in my garage I will sell you for $500, cash in advance to a P.O. Box. /forums/images/graemlins/smirk.gif
We now spend good money on these worthless cards, pay employees good money to make them out and paid some really good money to the “consulting firm” that dreamed this up and it hasn’t helped a thing.

Golfgar4 · Sep 1, 2004

( I suspect the toilet paper will be paired up with some "Elmer's Glue Sticks" and distributed to the clerical staff at the town hall as "make your own post-it-note paper" sometime in early to mid 2006. )

Bob,

I think you forgot to factor in the Paperwork Reduction Act.

Yes, I'm sure that a "valid" use will be determined for the toilet paper (other than it's original designated use). But whatever that might be, the first step in issuing the paper to whoever will be fortunate enough to rate it, will have to fill out at least 4 forms. One form that will justify why they want to use it; a second form to verify that they completed the first form; a third form that authorizes them to remove the product from the storage area; and a fourth form that assures the powers to be that they have complied with all applicable Federal, State and local regulations, including the Paperwork Reduction Act . /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif

And yes, I am a government employee. /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif

jwstewar · Sep 1, 2004

( at least 4 forms. One form that will justify why they want to use it; a second form to verify that they completed the first form; a third form that authorizes them to remove the product from the storage area; and a fourth form that assures the powers to be that they have complied with all applicable Federal, State and local regulations, including the Paperwork Reduction Act . )

Don't forget the 5 form: Request to dispose of Government property.

I used to be a government employee. I would say I used to be a government worker, but that would be a lie. /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif