What do you tell your wife??

[JRP]

What do you tell your wife when you want another implement? , or want to go mow instead of watch the baby, or when you want to go work on the tractor.

My replies have not been working too well. I usually get a reply that includes "stupid tractor".

Are there other things that I also need to be careful about??

 

[tsh3]

jrpoux, I think you are going about this all wrong. You see, I bought my tractor just
to please my wife.
"You know Honey, if we had a tractor, we could do a much better job of taking care
of this place in half the time. More time for us to do fun stuff."
"You know Honey, If we get a loader with that tractor, we could mulch the flower beds
in no time and you wouldn't have to haul it with the wheelbarrow".
"You want a bigger garden and some more flower beds? If we had a tiller, we could
have any size garden or as many flower beds as you want, no problem. "
And then I say "What do ya think? Should we get it?"
And then she sez "Sure, go ahead."
After we get it I tell her that buying that tractor, loader, tiller etc. was the best Idea
she ever had. So how can she object when you use the tractor, after all, it was
her idea and you're only doing for her. /w3tcompact/icons/wink.gif

PS Just the other day she said we shoulda bought it a long time ago.

Steve

 

[r0GuE]

If she knows you LIKE to work with the tractor, you've already blown it. For me, it's just another SACRIFICE that I make for my family.

Rogue

 

[Boondox]

I told my wife not to think of it as a tractor, but to consider it my land yacht...my hobby.

Pete

www.GatewayToVermont.com

 

[Youare]

This has been a sensitive issue for me from time to time. I justified the first tractor and logging winch because we heat our home strickly with wood stoves, and to complement the portable saw mill we ( I ) have. It made gathering fire wood much easier, it also allowed me to do some dirt moving tasks I would have had to pay someone else for. The bottom line was the tractor made my life easier and expanded the scope of work I could do by my self. I was eager to get out there and do all kinds of neat things when ever I got the chance.

For my wife, the tractor that was to save me all kinds of time and enegry turned into the thing that kept me occupied for hours on end whenever the sun was shining. She did not find the same degree of pleasure running a chain saw or moving a pile of dirt that I did. This developed into two different views of the tractor for me it was something that gave me great pleasure and the ability to do some neat stuff, for her it was something that kept me away from her.

Once I came to the realization that if I spent 20 minutes or so talking to her when I got home from work finding out how she was doing and what she needed from me life was better. My wife was able to stay at home and take care of our three boys while they were growing up. This presented a situation in itself. I would come home from work wanting to be at home for a while, she would have been home all day and was ready to be away from home forr a while.

Bottom line is give your wife the time she needs and deserves, think of how much time you spent just with her when you we dating no matter how long ago it was, they remember. When the time came that I wanted to buy the new tractor she was comfortable with it because we had worked things out, I balanced her needs and my desires.

Mother's are very jealous of those things that come between their children and the father of those children. What really makes most mothers happy is seeing the father of those children spending quality time together.
I also have learned to recognize that "look" when I am begining to tip the balance in the wrong direction. I also taught her how to operate the new tractor so she feels a part of this.

Good Luck

 

[theboman]

My girlfriend and I were in the exact same situation....Take her to a concert/movie/dinner etc or get that rotary cutter.
So how is that new Planet Of Apes? At times I miss her, but then again my hillside is looking really good!

Bluegrass, Pick It Up!

 

[Youare]

One more thing, although there are many more I can think of after 28 years of marriage. When I came to the realization that it is NOT just all about me and my needs, it is all about the family and our needs.

 

[Charliebrn]

I solved it like this: They showed up to deliver my new BX one weekend last winter. Thw wife looked at them backing into the drive and asked what they were doing. "Oh," I replied nonchalantly..."they are bringing me my tractor". Silence. She asked "What about the Cub you just bought last year?". "Sold it" I replied..."to my brother". Silence. "how much?" she asked. "the cub covered a lot of it, the rest I already paid for". They were now unloading it..the BX with the FEL, the 60"mower and the Woods Box blade. "Seems a bit much, doesn't it?" She asked, staring at me now...I could feel the eyes burning a hole through me. My reply: "Well, I figger I could have spent the money in a bar or on a poker game, but i reckon it's better to spend my money and my time around here."

That was it. She doesn't say anything anymore...every now and then, she'll shake her head when she sees me doing something with it. I'll grin. But she does have some nice gardens now. And the back scrub is turning into a nice little park. /w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif

 

[Knight9]

I took a bit of a different approach. Went and got all the brochures from the dealers in my area. MF, NH, JD, Kubota. Just kept looking at them, leaving them on the coffee tables, kitchen counter, bedside table, desk, bathroom counter. Kept showing her pictures and asking what she thought about this or that. Eventually she just decided she'd had enough with the brochures and "talking about it" and told me to just hurry up and buy one. "If you insist" was a pretty simple reply! /w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif

Kevin

 

[Anonymous Poster]

Thanks Youare,

Your suggestions are very good. I'll try the twenty minutes thing. Also, I take my daughter over to the tractor often and she rides with me. I think my daughter liking the tractor helps. It fits the comments about childern and fathers.

I also had brochures laying around for months. My wife didn't get a fathers day present for me, so on father's day she told me that my gift from my daughter was a tractor, and to go pick one out. What Luck!

jrpoux