You May Be A Redneck

[crash325]

> Windows into the redneck psyche?/B]












>
> Rednecks have the lowest stress rate because they do
> Not understand the seriousness of most medical terminology:
>
> Medical Term
>
> Redneck Definition
> Artery
>
> The study of paintings
> Bacteria
>
> Back door to cafeteria
> Barium
>
> What doctors do when patients die
> Benign
>
> What you be, after you be eight
> Caesarean Section
>
> A neighborhood in Rome
> Cat scan
>
> Searching for Kitty
> Cauterize
>
> Made eye contact with her
> Colic
>
> A sheep dog
> Coma
>
> A punctuation mark
> Dilate
>
> To live long
> Enema
>
> Not a friend
> Fester
>
> Quicker than someone else
> Fibula
>
> A small lie
> Impotent
>
> Distinguished, well known
> Labor Pain
>
> Getting hurt at work
> Medical Staff
>
> A Doctor's cane
> Morbid
>
> A higher offer
> Nitrates
>
> Rates of Pay for Working at Night,
> Normally more money than Days
> Node
>
> I knew it
> Outpatient
>
> A person who has fainted
> Pelvis
>
> Second cousin to Elvis
> Post Operative
>
> A letter carrier
> Recovery Room
>
> Place to do upholstery
> Rectum
>
> Nearly killed him
> Secretion
>
> Hiding something
> Seizure
>
> Roman Emperor
> Tablet
>
> A small table
> Terminal Illness
>
> Getting sick at the airport
> Tumor
>
> One plus one more
> Urine
>
> Opposite of you're out
>

 

[paulharvey]

Someone needs to get the guy from pic#1 a crossbow.

 

[rsallen]

Add inarticulate to that list.

 

[mikehaugen]

I don't know about you guys, but I like the couch/log. The excavator bucket is photo-shopped but funny nonetheless.

 

[Steppenwolfe]

Uneducated ignorance is far from funny.

 

[jaotguy]

nahh ... just bring a 6 pack to a job interview ....

 

[oosik]

I like the log couch. I got one in the works right now.

 

[crash325]

Cletus & Billy Bob

Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day in Texas when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere.

Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left. He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt. Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, "What the world're ya doing, Billy Bob?"

"Good grief, Cletus, ya scared the bejeebers out of me," says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob.

"But me 'n the wife been havin’ trouble lately in the bedroom d'partment, and the therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor."

Don't make me come splain this to you!

 

[boggen]

hey now, i remember using a drill for a truck window! though it wasn't a battery drill :/

 

[jaotguy]

Cletus and Billy Bob

hey ! why is yo all driving an new Cadillac?

the doctor said I was Impotent , so now I is actin impotent.