opinions on whether to bail someone out of jail.

[RobertBrown]

Have you checked and made sure he didn't steal your credit card?
If your on the fence about it then it's clear to me you should let him figure this one out.
He will be back around looking for work, maybe a little wiser maybe not.
It's your call, I can't help you with this decision.

 

[ncnurseryman]

No, he didn't get my info. He actually doesn't know where I live deliberately. I thinks he stole it from one of the series of folks he stays with.

 

[dmccarty]

No, he didn't get my info. He actually doesn't know where I live deliberately. I thinks he stole it from one of the series of folks he stays with.

That right there, is a sign,

He actually doesn't know where I live deliberately.

Later,
Dan

 

[RoyJackson]

If it was just the pot charges, I might go the bail.
That credit card bit...that's a showstopper and the boy isn't going to stop **** like that...

 

[Lou66]

Less not put him in prison till we know the facts.. Lou

 

[dmccarty]

If it was just the pot charges, I might go the bail.
That credit card bit...that's a showstopper and the boy isn't going to stop **** like that...

Yeppers, I have been thinking about the credit card theft from the start of this thread. If the guy stole the card from people who were giving him a place to stay, well, that is just another sign. Stealing is bad, but stealing from people who are helping you out, is even worse.

Later,
Dan

 

[SPIKER]

I'm not much for giving people free rides at all, like a couple others said the kids now thing POT is nothing that he president smoked it (Clinton, Bush and Obama) so must be no big deal. While not all pot heads will become addicts of hard drugs all hard drug users were pot heads. These kids and a bunch of states thing that these drugs are fine, they are not. I say leave him in there visit him if you choose but be aware he will probably never see himself as in the wrong. You may in fact be setting yourself up as a future victim of this kid.

My Dumb little nephew lost a very good job I put my neck out to help/get for him because of smoking dope. At that point I cut him off from any further help from me and he knows it. I never smoked pot and at 18 I was in military too like someone else said. By the time I was 19 I was working on billion dollar planes and by 24 working on worlds most expensive airplane with all those fancy checks put on 5 years worth of background.

I got into argument with a POT HEAD that thought legalizing it and taxing it would pay off the Fed Debt in less than 5 years lol... I had to explain the debt and they still wouldn't believe me.

Mark

 

[ncnurseryman]

I actually thought about not visiting and just cut all ties. Sounds harsh but I don't need drama of this sort.

 

[dusty3030]

If it was just the pot charges, I might go the bail.
That credit card bit...that's a showstopper and the boy isn't going to stop **** like that...

I am with Roy exactly on the pot and the other. The stealing part can't be tolerated.

If he ain't learned stealing is wrong by now, bailing him out sure as **** ain't going to help him.

 

[EE_Bota]

I actually thought about not visiting and just cut all ties. Sounds harsh but I don't need drama of this sort.

That's a perfectly legit decision too.

 

[dusty3030]

I actually thought about not visiting and just cut all ties. Sounds harsh but I don't need drama of this sort.

There is a whole culture of "users". Takes being around some to know them, but it is a lifestyle to suck dry every human you meet or encounter that will give you anything and move on to the next. Sad but true.

 

[Lou66]

I actually thought about not visiting and just cut all ties. Sounds harsh but I don't need drama of this sort.

That is understandable.. Lou

 

[Dr_Zinj]

Simple, this is like any other investment or bet. Never invest or bet more money than you can afford to lose.
Since you say you can't handle the loss if he skips, do NOT bail him out.

Personally, I think the drug laws in this country are a crime worse than the drugs themselves.

This kid's problem isn't the drug use, that's just a symptom of his not liking his life. His problem is, he didn't have parents and a family worth a handful of beans. Which is why he didn't finish high school, doesn't know how to save up for a cheap car, won't listen to good advice from you, and has been committing crimes. Thing is, you can't change him. He has to recognize that he's got a problem, figure out what his problem is, and make both the decision and commitment to changing himself. Until that happens, everything you or anyone else does for him will be throwing money down a rat hole.

I'm fairly certain that Jesus never meant anyone should impoverish their own family and deprive their own children just to help the poor. That would be a violation of the Golden Rule.

 

[LJH]

There is a whole culture of "users". Takes being around some to know them, but it is a lifestyle to suck dry every human you meet or encounter that will give you anything and move on to the next. Sad but true.

I have a family member like this. If you do him a favor or give him a break he then sees you as a chump to be worked for all it's worth. He burned every bridge in the family and is now working his way through friends and unsuspecting strangers. Zero self-respect, zero ambition, zero credibility. I'll never understand that one.

 

[jmc]

Good debate. Good issues raised on both sides. Civil.

 

[Lou66]

How does one know how someone with turnout?.. until they are dead.. then the story has been unfold.. It is easy to give up on someone and hide behind believes that he/she is no good.. one small act, good or bad, does not set the stage for the rest on ones life.. Lou

 

[Dr_Zinj]

That's true Lou, but apparently this young man has a history of bad acts. That may not have "set the stage" for him, but it sure has placed the markers on the floor.
Nobody knows how this will turn out. But speaking as a professional statistician, I'd say he's on a train bound for a destination that none of us would want to go to.

 

[rsallen]

Haven't read the entire thread but, I'd probably have a good heart to heart with the young man before I'd do anything.
But I certainly wouldn't do anything else if I couldn't bear the weight if I took the burden on my shoulders.

I have friends I'd go to the wall for, but a kid that has a sketchy history with me?
I'd talk to and keep close contact with the parole officer.

 

[Ross71]

You can't judge a man by what has happened to him. You judge how he deals with what happens to him.

 

[J F]

Can you judge him on his past actions? (and who is giving the authority?)