opinions on whether to bail someone out of jail.

[Lou66]

Yeah, I agree he has to learn on his own I can't do it for him. I've given advice to him more than once on things he can do to make something of himself and pointed out to him all of his good qualities and talents. I may go visit him after next weeks vacation. Per the jailer he got at least a month jail time waiting for court.

Think that is a good idea,, maybe what he needs to get on the right road,, let him know that someone care.. good luck on what ever you decide.. they do learn to be con quickly with all the jail room lawyers and play on the simplicity of the caring.. Lou..

 

[Midniteoyl]

If you help him out, then he will have you on the hook. Then he will need a few hundred more for something else and the hook sinks even deeper. Before you know it you would be on the hook for 10-20,000 with no end in sight. He had enough money to buy drugs; he should have saved that for bail.

No he didnt have the money, thus the credit card fraud :thumbsup:

 

[CurlyDave]

No he didnt have the money, thus the credit card fraud :thumbsup:

Where can he buy illegal drugs with a credit card?

 

[Midniteoyl]

Where can he buy illegal drugs with a credit card?

Same way you pay 'rent' with food stamps - trade.

 

[rockinmywaypa]

What would it be worth to let a kid that has no one else know that there is one person in the world that he can trust, to look up to. If you're allowed to meet him before you free him set some ground rules, he works a week or two on credit to cover the chance he doesn't show up to court, if he shows then pay his wages. Let him know that you're no pansy to be taken advantage of but if he's straight up with you then he can trust in you to help him.

 

[J F]

It sounds like a lot of that has happened already.

 

[Pixguy]

If he didn't show two weeks ago for money, do you really think he's gonna show for nothing? (In his mind)

 

[hosspuller]

OP ... The best you can do is visit him in jail regularly. Reassure him that his life is his to control. Offer him a job when he gets out. Contingent on him showing up. Laying out has to have consequences. While you can't give him a full time job. That's a start.

 

[Sigarms]

OP ... The best you can do is visit him in jail regularly. Reassure him that his life is his to control. Offer him a job when he gets out. Contingent on him showing up. Laying out has to have consequences. While you can't give him a full time job. That's a start.

+1

Stay in touch with him, let him pay for his mistake, tell him where you KNOW he did wrong, and he pays his time, you will still work with him if he wishes.

The last couple of years we've been involved with fostering. It's both amazing and sad. You wouldn't believe some of the horror stories. Since you mentioned he didn't have a father and his mom is pretty much useless, I've seen that scenario too many times. Sad thing is the kid was NEVER taught right from wrong, or that their can be consequences for his actions.

I realize it's easy for everyone to blame the kid, but he never had guideance. I've just seen a lot of screwed up kids due to no fault of their own. Sad to say, you can't pick family.

Ultimately if you bail him out, he learns nothing. However, if you really want to try, tell him you will be there for him if he wants to try and change. That's more than he has now I'm sure.

 

[300UGUY]

I've been on both sides of this. I wouldn't throw bail. I would go to vist him, and offer him a job when he gets out. He will get the time served as a credit on his sentence. A lot of screwed up kids out there.