sendero
Gold Member
... on the planet! Ok, this anecdote is going to reveal what a total city-boy I am. Sure, I've fished and I can catch fish and besides, anyone could catch a fish from my pond.
But last week I decided it was time to eat one of the catfish I stocked my pond with almost 2 years ago. These fish are running just under 2 lbs from my eyeball estimation (I get a good look at them when I throw that catfish food on the water and they come up to get it /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif ).
However, they were apparently not as hungry as the 4 pounder who wound up on my line. Ok, more fish to eat, no problem.
Now, I've never cleaned a fish in my life but I can read and I've looked at 2-3 sets of instructions for doing so. I decided this fish wasn't quite big enough to "steak" and was too big to "cook whole", so I went for the filet. I dragged him over to a work area and got my filet knife, a hammer, filet glove and skinning pliers.
Now, the crusty old devil wasn't dead and none of the cleaning instructions I had addressed the issue of finishing him off before the slicing was to commence. So, I whacked him with a hammer, square on the head. This really didn't seem to bother him that much.
So I whacked him again. And again, harder and harder. Frankly, the fish did not seem to really care. He still flopped occassionally and the gills maintained their rhythmic movement.
I called my brother who fishes a lot and hangs with an Arkansas boy who is a "pro". He said I should cut his head off. Well, that sounded like a good enough idea, so I got a hatchet. I whacked the fish at the back of the head, hard - and again, other than starting to bleed a bit it really didn't bother the fish. I was really wanting to get this baby cleaned, fileted and on ice - but I decided that time would probably be the best killer. I wandered off to the shed to put some stuff away.
I came back 15 minutes later and the fish was still breathing. At this point I was getting annoyed. I just wanted the darn fish to have a happy death so I could eat him. He was making me feel real guilty just by continuing to breathe after all the abuse I'd heaped on him.
So, I took the .22 mag revolver I carry around (varmints) out of my pocket and shot him right "between the eyes". I suddenly heard my wife laughing from the trailer - she witnessed the execution. I went inside and she was laughing so hard she had tears in her eyes. She said "well you killed him didn't you! The way you stood back after you shot him, you looked like you expected him to fight back!" And you know what? If that **** fish had flopped back to the pond after I shot it, it would not have surprised me /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif
Ok, all you experienced fishermen, how the **** are you supposed to kill these **** things. And please don't suggest that I just clean him alive, that isn't gonna happen /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif (And BTW, I realize that "cleaning" isn't strictly necessary to filet, but I still wanted him dead before I started skinning.)
But last week I decided it was time to eat one of the catfish I stocked my pond with almost 2 years ago. These fish are running just under 2 lbs from my eyeball estimation (I get a good look at them when I throw that catfish food on the water and they come up to get it /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif ).
However, they were apparently not as hungry as the 4 pounder who wound up on my line. Ok, more fish to eat, no problem.
Now, I've never cleaned a fish in my life but I can read and I've looked at 2-3 sets of instructions for doing so. I decided this fish wasn't quite big enough to "steak" and was too big to "cook whole", so I went for the filet. I dragged him over to a work area and got my filet knife, a hammer, filet glove and skinning pliers.
Now, the crusty old devil wasn't dead and none of the cleaning instructions I had addressed the issue of finishing him off before the slicing was to commence. So, I whacked him with a hammer, square on the head. This really didn't seem to bother him that much.
So I whacked him again. And again, harder and harder. Frankly, the fish did not seem to really care. He still flopped occassionally and the gills maintained their rhythmic movement.
I called my brother who fishes a lot and hangs with an Arkansas boy who is a "pro". He said I should cut his head off. Well, that sounded like a good enough idea, so I got a hatchet. I whacked the fish at the back of the head, hard - and again, other than starting to bleed a bit it really didn't bother the fish. I was really wanting to get this baby cleaned, fileted and on ice - but I decided that time would probably be the best killer. I wandered off to the shed to put some stuff away.
I came back 15 minutes later and the fish was still breathing. At this point I was getting annoyed. I just wanted the darn fish to have a happy death so I could eat him. He was making me feel real guilty just by continuing to breathe after all the abuse I'd heaped on him.
So, I took the .22 mag revolver I carry around (varmints) out of my pocket and shot him right "between the eyes". I suddenly heard my wife laughing from the trailer - she witnessed the execution. I went inside and she was laughing so hard she had tears in her eyes. She said "well you killed him didn't you! The way you stood back after you shot him, you looked like you expected him to fight back!" And you know what? If that **** fish had flopped back to the pond after I shot it, it would not have surprised me /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif
Ok, all you experienced fishermen, how the **** are you supposed to kill these **** things. And please don't suggest that I just clean him alive, that isn't gonna happen /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif (And BTW, I realize that "cleaning" isn't strictly necessary to filet, but I still wanted him dead before I started skinning.)
