Do you have plans for your place when you pass away?

[Kyle_in_Tex]

That's one place where you and I differ Dave. While I hope that the work I put into this property is appreciated and carried forth when I'm gone, there's nothing unique about it, so why should I control it from the grave. (Although current plan is to be buried here next to my dogs.)

I honestly don't know if I still belong to SWOAM; I can't remember if I paid my dues this year or not.
One big issue I had is the way that they push the trusts. An example of a good trust, where people got organized for the common good is here...https://www.downeastlakes.org

I won't mention the other side of the equation, because I don't wish to siderail a good thread.

PS to OP, you've asked a very good question, I hope that it generates a lot of discussjon.

Its OK to have differences. I want the diversity.... if we can just keep from arguing. Shouldn't be much to argue about. All I hope is that it gets thoughts and methods from those who have already decided, to those of us who haven't decided.

Many of us are older, and talking about these decisions can be tough, but I feel they are worth it for our descendants.

When my uncle passed away last year, he had a very special folder, at the front of his file cabinet. My cousin told me how well he had planned everything, including the songs at his funeral. His death was unexpected. He put the will, all bank accounts, credit card info, passwords, I mean everything all neatly put into the folder. Besides grief, my cousin was actually very relieved that he had created it and it took away most of the anxieties among the siblings about the whole situation.

 

[Kyle_in_Tex]

I was thinking to about this everyone in my family that was blood to me is dead! I have no kids or wife. There no way I will give it back to the Gov't I'll BURN THE HOUSE DOWN FIRST.

If I were you, I would consider my best friend's children, if they are worth a flip. Just my opinion.

 

[MossRoad]

My wife has already told me if I croak she's hiring the neighbor to sort it out, save the good stuff for the kids, sell the stuff they don't want, dumpster the rest and she's buying a townhouse. And that's just our current house on one acre. She will keep the 20 acres in the country for the kids to deal with as they choose. She says she does not enjoy mowing grass, plowing snow, cleaning the swimming pool, or having the septic pumped as much as I do! :laughing: I won't care, because I'll be dead! :thumbsup: If she goes first, I'm selling the house on one acre, building a shack and a pole barn on the 20 acres and living like a hermit the rest of my days, with a wood burner and an old orange cat.

 

[MossRoad]

I was thinking to about this everyone in my family that was blood to me is dead! I have no kids or wife. There no way I will give it back to the Gov't I'll BURN THE HOUSE DOWN FIRST.

Instead of ruining it, why not leave it to a good charity? They could use it or sell it and use the money to do some good works that you are interested in.

 

[sseelhoff]

Married and no children. We plan on selling out when we retire (10 years or so) and moving. What happens with the next property when we die remains unresolved. We have nieces and nephews who we never hear from. Surviving spouse will likely have everything liquidated and the money donated to charity, with the exception of some family heirlooms and antiques.

 

[MossRoad]

When my mom died, everything went to my dad. When he died, everything went to me and my siblings. One of them and I were the co-executors of the will. The will stated even-steven between all 5 of us. None of us wanted either of the two houses involved (he warned us the main house was a money pit and architectural experiment in advance), so we sold them and lumped the cash into the pool with his other cash assets. His belongings were quite many. So we came up with a color tag system. We all got a unique color tag and affixed our tags to anything we wanted. We had a couple weeks to go through the stuff. Anything not tagged by the agreed upon time was donated to Goodwill, St. Vincent DePaul, etc... anything with just our tag, we took. Anything with two tags went to a two-tag pile. Three tag pile, etc... Then we went to the 5 tag pile, oldest sibling picked one item, next sibling, etc... down the line and went through the piles in order. Everything was gone in a matter of day. No arguments. No sour grapes. Worked great!

We've set up our will the same. I die, wife gets everything. Wife dies, I get everything. We both die, the kids get everything and have to split evenly. Current house gets sold. Neither kid wants it, so no problem there. Rural land goes to both of them. If they can't come to an agreement, it gets sold. If one wants it more than the other, they have to buy it from the other at a "reasonable" price we have not yet determined. If neither one is living in the area, we suggest they donate it to a conservation fund if there is no house on it by then. And we recommend the color tag system to divide the belongings. Hope it works out for them.

At one time, we had an elaborate will with stipulations, conditions, etc.... but our lawyer said if you try to control them from the grave, they will just resent you for eternity, so let them make their own adult decisions. For a lawyer, I think that was excellent advice! They aren't all bad and it would actually cost him business by not litigating between the two kids. :laughing:

 

[Citydude]

Before my parents passed, they set up a revokable trust that named each other as trustees and me as first surviving trustee. They then put all of their belongings into the trust. When Dad died, Mom continued to manage the assets in the trust and there was no probate court involved, and no taxes either. When she passed, again no probate court, and the size of the estate was below the inheritance tax limits so no taxes were due. You'll have to figure out if you want all of your children appointed trustees, or some trusted third party, perhaps the attorney that prepares the trust. I think you can specify that only a certain amount be distributed each year, and to whom. Just as important are a living will for both you and your wife that states your wishes should you be incapacitated. Do you want them to pull out all the stops to keep you alive, or would you prefer to pass peacefully? Along with that is a medical power of attorney that gives someone the authority to make medical decisions for you, and a legal power of attorney so that they can manage your affairs when you are no longer able to. The Bar Association in your state maintains a list of attorneys specializing in elder law, but the best way to find a good one is to ask around. This is one of those areas where word of mouth really is the best way to find a good one.

^^^
Very sound advice.

 

[MacLawn]

Moss, that 20 acres and an orange cat sounds good! I'll have to add a couple of brown dogs though.

 

[Jstpssng]

Dave1949; I believe we share similar ideas, we just differ on the implementation
My parent's live on the same 30 acres which our ancestors bought when they came over to escape the potato famine... Yet in my lifetime it's changed from rural ground to residential, with the Auburn mall a mile away on ground where I remember dairy cows grazing.
Imagine if my grandparent's had put that land in a trust, tieing my family to it if my parent's wanted to move into a retirement community.
To the OP- this could/should develop into one of the greatest discussions on TBN... If it doesn't go political. That could prove difficult however.

Up here we have a major landowner who (alledgedly) grew up here, moved to North Carolina and made hundreds of millions of dollars, then came back and has been buying up land at heretofore ridiculous prices, which nobody around here could ever afford. She then reduced access (which is her right as landowner) because she wants to donate it to the federal government as a "seed" for a national park encompassing 1/3_of the state, putting many people-including me- out of work. When she met resistance she decided to "donate" access to nearby land which she doesn't own or have any interest in.

 

[Kenneth in Texas]

One thing for sure none of my or the wifes family will get a nickle :cool2:

we would give it all to a nursing home before family got their hands on anything