do you loan your trailer out

[deere755]

I posted some time back about loaning my truck and trailer to my stepdaughter and it coming home with a dent in the tail gate and some damage done to the fender on the trailer. She wanted to borrow it again and I suggested she get a uhaul and I pay for it. This seemed fair to me but she threw a fit about it. Now a little over a year later she and her new boyfriend who I don't much care for are wanting to borrow it so she can move again. As it turns out the weekend she is moving I will be out of town with my son for a baseball tournament. I don't want to let her or her new boyfriend have it without me being around to supervise it. This stirred up a lot of problems between us the last time I refused to let her use it after she had damaged it. My wife thinks I should let the trailer go this time and just look the other way if it comes home damaged to keep peace in the family. Because of the tention between my stepdaughter and I my wife was unable to see her grandkids as often. Things are just now starting to get better between us and my wife is afraid this will stir it up all over again. I do loan out my trailer to a few people but I am very picky about who uses it. I know the people who I let use it will take care of anything that may be damaged as this has happened before. I know it is family but I don't believe this should make it ok to loan it out. It really makes me mad that our grandkids are used as a bargaining chip. Any opinions would be appreciated. Am I being unfair? If they want to move the weekend before or the week end after I will bring the truck and trailer over and help them myself. I just cannot be there that weekend.

 

[MrJimi]

Give her BF the # for U-Haul and be done with it.
I don't loan my trailer out and if my friends need it, I will move it for them

 

[AlanB]

Would it make my wife happy if I lent it out, and can I reasonbly afford the damage that is likely too happen?

While it would bother me on several fronts, I would probably go to heck with it, it is just a trailer, and let it go at that. Turn a blind eye unless you think they will kill someone with it (like tow a 2 5/16 coupler on a 1 7/8 ball)

I would not be happy, but every time I thought about it, I would picture my grandkids and my wife and just hang onto that thought.

 

[rdln]

WWDLS--hmm what would Dr. Laura say? I dont think you should lend it to her. I like the philosyphy "Trust people until they give you a reason not to"
And it sounds like she gave you a reason not to lend it again.

Her quarrel is with you, not your wife. Using the grandkids as a bargaining chips is very immature.

How is this new boyfriend's driving record?

 

[dqdave1]

You could convienantly loan it to someone else the wekend they need it and say it was already spoken for that weekend, and then make mention that she damaged it the last time she used it so you would have to think long and hard about loaning it to her again anyway.

 

[HarryVanderpool]

I make it perfectly clear:
I DO NOT loan tools or borrow tools, so don't even ask.
That goes for neighbors, co-workers, kids, makes no difference.
No means no.

>>> It really makes me mad that our grandkids are used as a bargaining chip. Any opinions would be appreciated.<<<

Your problem is that you have the whole thing backwards.
YOU are the Elder. YOU are of highest value.
So if there are any bargaining chips floating around, a grandfather is the chip of the highest value.
Hold your head up and don't be a door mat.
You are the grandfather; YOU have the final word.
If they don't respect you, then they aren't worth a plug nickle.
So why would you want to loan something to someone like that??!!
My $0.02

 

[Tig]

Since there is family and grandkids involved there is no graceful way out for you. I would probably lend it one more time and then sell it.
That way no one is offended and you can rent when necessary.
I know this solution may be a bit of a bitter pill to swallow but it keeps the peace. Use the money from the sale to buy yourself a toy.

 

[MossRoad]

I never loan out any expensive or hard to operate tools to family or friends. I do the work for them and ask for a root beer as payment. Be honest and up front with them.... something like:

I am nervous about loaning out my truck and trailer due to liability and damage. If you hurt someone else with my equipment, I may get sued. If you damage it, I will feel bad and it may put a strain on our relationship. However, if I hurt someone else or damage it, then it is my problem. Let's pick a better time when I can help you. If we can't find a good time, perhaps you could rent something to do the job and I will pitch in to help you with the costs.

That would seem gracious and reasonable, in my opinion. Best of luck.

 

[Soundguy]

Ditto what Mr Jimi said... I try to make a habbit out of not loaning out trucks, tools, tractors, trailers or my wife.

I will however show up with any of those things and help a friend or family member out

I did one time loan out my smaller, older 4x8 utility trailer to my uncle. he had helped me plenty in a few hard spots, and he was a commercial truck driver so i figured if i was going to trust anybody.. it better be him. Yurne dout good.. trailer came back better than it left.. he put a new plug end on it as the old one was kinda dry rotted.

Past that.. uhaul or show up to help!

soundguy

I posted some time back about loaning my truck and trailer to my stepdaughter and it coming home with a dent in the tail gate and some damage done to the fender on the trailer. She wanted to borrow it again and I suggested she get a uhaul and I pay for it. This seemed fair to me but she threw a fit about it. Now a little over a year later she and her new boyfriend who I don't much care for are wanting to borrow it so she can move again. As it turns out the weekend she is moving I will be out of town with my son for a baseball tournament. I don't want to let her or her new boyfriend have it without me being around to supervise it. This stirred up a lot of problems between us the last time I refused to let her use it after she had damaged it. My wife thinks I should let the trailer go this time and just look the other way if it comes home damaged to keep peace in the family. Because of the tention between my stepdaughter and I my wife was unable to see her grandkids as often. Things are just now starting to get better between us and my wife is afraid this will stir it up all over again. I do loan out my trailer to a few people but I am very picky about who uses it. I know the people who I let use it will take care of anything that may be damaged as this has happened before. I know it is family but I don't believe this should make it ok to loan it out. It really makes me mad that our grandkids are used as a bargaining chip. Any opinions would be appreciated. Am I being unfair? If they want to move the weekend before or the week end after I will bring the truck and trailer over and help them myself. I just cannot be there that weekend.

 

[Blagadan]

I found every time I loaned out something like a trailer, I always got it back woth some damage, all be it minor, broken sidelights, cracked fender etc. You loan something out to a person, chances are they are not familiar with using that item, a trailer is a tough thing for some folks to manage when they're not used to it. My brother cannot back up a trailer to save his own life. Always seems to run it into something. I find it costs me less to go out and be the driver. I know this option is not open to you.
Now if your stepdaughter uses this trailer as a tool to cause upset in the family if you DONT lend it to her, then she is not a nice person. I feel sorry for you.
You need to discuss liability prior to loan, if she bends or breaks something, she pays for it this time. Let her know she damaged it the last time and you didnt mind paying to fix it the first time, but if she dings it again, she pays... simple as that...
I find it difficult to say no when my family wants to borrow my stuff. I have no problem saying no to neighbours and friends, preferring to volunteer to help them and make a day of it where possible.
The few times I was lucky enough to borrow something from somebody, I always made it my business to do something to make the item look "good as new" when i return it, be it washing it or fixing it up if something was previously broken on it...