givers and takers,how do i say NO

[escavader]

We had a discussion on another thread about givers and takers.It turns out a person whom im related,and kind heartedly dug a 3oo ft ditch,for waterpipe and backfilled has volunteered me for more."I need my banking dug out ,and a retaining wall built,I need a 100 ft ditch dug on both sides of the drive,Im having 40 yards of gravel coming soon for you to spread....etc etc Since you like to play on your tractor"
I did it all for free last year,you know scratch my back .....I did a freebie for about everyone last year,felt good! I dont want any paying jobs,im streatched to the limits now,with my regular job,and my own stuff.How do i get myself out of this problem...pretend the tractors broke,fake a sickness,pretend i got to work all summer,fake my death /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif? I want to be labeled a giver,but how do you tell when you are being taken advantage of?Its in the wifes family,so shell get mad? I feel caught,I had a few jobs i had taken,several large projects for me,and i wanted to donate some major seat time to an atv club.plus family time etc
HELP PLEASE I KNOW SOMEONES IN THE SAME BOAT!!!!
ALAN

 

[shvl73]

For me it would be "If only I had the time, but it looks like I'll be quite busy" and after the next obvious question, "Only I operate my tractor" Good luck, I don't envy you.

 

[Jstpssng]

I think shvl73 said it best. We've all been in that position at some point in time. The first time is hardest, it does get easier though. Some people don't understand how much it costs you, over and above your time and the cost of fuel.

Right now I can honestly say "my insurance company won't let me." /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

[DUMBDOG]

I can only see one way out of this, so that you do not get into any trouble. Give away or sell the tractor.

 

[shvl73]

</font><font color="blue" class="small">( Its in the wifes family,so shell get mad? )</font>

DUMBDOG, you may be right. Reeeaaly bad spot to be in!

 

[Jstpssng]

</font><font color="blue" class="small">( I can only see one way out of this, so that you do not get into any trouble. Give away... the tractor. )</font>
Actually, he has a point. If it comes down to that, I'm just up the road and could sacrifice the time to help you out. /forums/images/graemlins/tongue.gif

 

[Gatorboy]

Just say you can't do it. If you just start making excuses, then you'll have to keep making up new ones each time you are approached. There is no harm in saying NO.

 

[midlf]

Check your insurance. My tractor is covered under my homeowners and all coverages, liability, comp and damage only cover when the tractor is on the property. If yours is like mine then, as suggested, say "my insurance won't cover". Anyone who tries to talk you into doing it anyway has no concern at all for your welfare.

 

[MossRoad]

There is a Dilbert cartoon hanging on my 'fridge... It goes something like this:

A guy comes up to Dilbert and says, "Hey, Dilbert. Would you mind stopping by my house after work and seeing if you can fix my computer?"

Dilbert replies, "Sure. And while I do that you can be at my house cleaning the grout in my shower."

The other guy says, "That's crazy talk."

To which Dilbert replies, "Hey, I'm not the one who majored in comparative literature."

I think you can modify it a bit to suite your needs. /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

[HomeBrew2]

Key phrase: "Its in the wifes family ... "

YOU ARE PIFFLED !!!

... let me put it this way, there are some folks who do not take "NO" well. As an experiment, ask your wife to tell her relatives to piffle off. Hopefully your situation is far different than my history. BTW, now that you have been "labeled" as a giver ... you are a target. If you get rid of your tractor, it won't stop ... because you have talents and skills. Yep, I've been in your boat. Now I'm sorry that I replied /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif