Stupid Chainsaw Trick

[rmorgan]

An excuse to pass along what is, IMHO, one of the funniest stories ever, which I have heard in various guises since growing up with a show called Saturday Night on the radio in Cleveland:

The workman's compensation board asked a mason who got hurt at work for details of his injury. This was his response:

"I am writing in response to your request for additional information, for block number 3 of the accident reporting form. I put 'poor planning' as the cause of my accident. You said in your letter that I should explain more fully and I trust the following detail will be sufficient. I am a bricklayer, asked to repair storm damage at the top of a local church steeple. I used a block and rope to hoist several barrel loads of bricks, of which I needed fewer than I had thought. When I was done, I had a good many bricks left over. Securing the rope at ground level, I went back to the top of the steeple and filled the barrel with bricks. Then I went back to the ground and untied the rope."

"You will note in block number 11 of the accident reporting form that I weigh only 155 pounds. The bricks, apparently, weighed rather more, and I was suddenly jerked off the ground. Due to my surprise, I held tight to the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rather rapid rate of speed up the side of the steeple, receiving scrapes to my face and arms. Halfway up, I met the barrel coming down, receiving a fractured skull and broken collarbone. I maintained my grip and continued ascending. When I reached the top, the fingers of my right hand jammed in the pulley, not stopping until they were two knuckles deep. Surprisingly, I was able to hold onto the rope in spite of my pain."

"However, when the barrel hit the ground, its bottom came out, laving a pile of bricks on the ground. Quit of its load, the barrel now weighed considerably less than did I. I refer you again to my weight in block number 11. As you might imagine, I began a rapid descent down the side of the steeple, receiving many scrapes and bruises to my side and back. Halfway down, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, and the lacerations of my legs and lower body."

"When I reached the bottom, I landed on the pile of bricks, receiving severe cuts and bruises to my person."

"At this time, I must have lost my presence of mind. For I let go the rope . . . ." /w3tcompact/icons/laugh.gif/w3tcompact/icons/laugh.gif/w3tcompact/icons/laugh.gif

 

[OverlyRun]

And. relieved of his weight, the empty barrel fell on his head?

 

[Anonymous Poster]

Even though you drive Orange rather then Green I agree 100% about the high revving, flesh chewing, chain saw teeth. I'm putting on an addition and had to remove the deck which involved cutting the 4x4 support posts. On went the helmet, ear protection, eye protection, safety pants, boots and gloves - all for 2 minutes worth of work, but I don't have to worry about missing knee caps or finding out how many stitches it takes to sew up a leg.

 

[fortyseven2n]

I stumbled and snagged my pantleg just as my Husky saw was coasting to a stop . At first , I thought I just cut my pants , but then I peeped through the 3" long cut in my pants just under the knee and I saw that I had just barely cut myself .

Lucky !!!!!

Be careful ! i could have just as easily have really gotten hurt .

Fortyseven2n

 

[Hans]

I'm feeling pretty lucky tonight. Had been limbing about an hour with Stihl Farmboss (should have been using a lighter saw) when I got careless/relaxed and let the saw swing right down next to my leg after cutting thru an overhead branch. Picture attached. My challenge is the Texas heat has really been affecting me more than usual and I think chaps are really going to overheat me quickly. However I think I will be getting some and just work for shorter periods at a time.

My father always says accidents are caused, they don't happen.
#1) Wrong saw for the job
#2) Out of shape user
#3) Rushing to stay of head of father in law who was brush-hogging after me.
#4) Was wearing all the right safety gear except for chaps

BE CAREFUL.

 

[DavidInNH]

Hans,

After reading this thread for a while, and slicing my pants at the knee, I went out and bought a pair of chaps. I've been watching the saw really closely recently and I think I'm going to spring for steel-toed boots "real soon now". This was the second time I sliced the pants - both times it was at the end of a long session and because I was tired. Its interesting to note that it happens AFTER you've finished the cut and it seems OK to relax your attention.

-david

 

[jhburke]

My dad had a sawmill and logging operation when I was younger. I ran a one man chainsaw most of the time. I wouldn't use a saw that would keep running. By that I mean I had to keep blipping the throttle to keep it running. especially when not making a cut. If I wasn't paying attention it died. This helped keep you alert after 9 or 10 hrs.

 

[DavidInNH]

Hmm/w3tcompact/icons/hmm.gif, that's an interesting perspective. I guess you could just turn the idle way down. I might just try that.

-david

 

[dmccarty]

Hans,

Get the chaps. If you run a chainsaw you sweat. Period. /w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif

I saw you where wearing jeans. With the exceptions of my heavy
wool trousers, jeans are the hottest things you can wear. I wear
cheapy WallyWorld thin cotton trousers almost all the time when
working.

I'm sure chaps keep some heat in but I have worked the chainsaw
when it was in the teens and low 20s. I still worked up a sweat! /w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif

In the summer I only work the saw in the mornings when it is cooler. I
can do this now since I don't have the work to chain saw all day. It makes
a difference. Make sure that you eat and drink plenty of water. Take breaks
if you get to hot. I stop work if my mind is not on what I'm doing or if I
starting doing stupid stuff. Just stop. I have had to just stop a couple of
times.

I also ended up getting good quality work boots with toe protection....

Later...
Dan

 

[Soundguy]

On the flip side, the jeans probably afforded some level of protection. Not as tight a weave as most saw chaps, but heavy denim is better than shorts or leg hair at fending off chainsaw blades!

Soundguy