TBN Funnies

[mikehaugen]

uh-oh.. I recognize one of those..

guess i need to start repalcing my tires a lil sooner.

maybe this will start a competition for who can get the most quotes on CompactTractorFan's list

 

[murphy1244]

I am on my second one, #2 has caused me some trouble

 

[Steave]

uh-oh.. I recognize one of those..

guess i need to start repalcing my tires a lil sooner.

As soon as I read that one I remembered you saying it. It was funny them.

 

[Soundguy]

true though.. I replace them 'after'

 

[CompactTractorFan]

Thanks for the comments guys, but I didn't write any of them. I just gather them up. :thumbsup:

 

[CompactTractorFan]

Latest volume:

"Some of my best childhood memories are now illegal"

"Hey - this is TBN - somebody must have a secure shipping container buried in a hillside that we can meet at ! I'll bring enough tinfoil hats for everybody"

"I think the Chinese do brilliantly at steel and iron, but not sure I want something based on chemicals"

"If you could remove every gun on earth....There would be huge rise in knife violence"

"your penmanship? have you seen my typo-ship"


"I think we need a new sub-forum entitled "Country Cooking", or "Home style Vittles:...or...."
"....or how I got my first heart attack"


"Re: What's the MOST FUN Thing to Do on YOUR Tractor?"
"My favorite is going up to the hunting property putting in food plots and brush hogging all the trails while I have a few barley pops"


"I am probably a bad example, but all of our kids were riding motorcycles at five or six"

"I was in northern Minnesota in 1975 when the Alexandria area got 17" of snow with 50 mph winds. Ladies and gentlemen, that is a blizzard"

"I can't imagine how the local tv forecasters would deal with that storm. I would imagine that they would invent a new category of storm warning. Something like an "end of days warning". Seriously, I just don't know how the lead weather guy would react. But I will bet it would entertaining"

"what about all those Y2K preppers with their 1,000 rolls of toilet paper and bags of grain"

"A little squirt of kroil, and just a little bit of persuasion with a pry bar and it's off"

"I of course hit fldot site and as usual.. it's like trying to pull a pin out of a haystack, in a barn full of hay stacks.. that's on fire"

"It's like seeing an old friend when stuff like that turns up"

"Of course, with no glasses everything is bit blurry and you don't want to find them by the crunching sound of stepping on them"

"We knew he was a dork when he showed up in a silver Ford windstar with a set of Whelen strobes on the roof. Bad hairpiece, too"

"so i'm sitting at the chiropractor's office waiting for the ball & chain to get a tune up and i found a copy of popular science to skim through"

"2 - 14year olds together can tear up an anvil so no way are they going to get on my RTV"

"Shucks! Just looking at that cage makes me want to plant a 'mater inside there"

"Around here that type of thing is druggies looking for prescription meds. You can't get high on a flat screen TV so why take it"

"Getting back to the meteor...I kinda wish it had landed on Washington DC"

 

[Soundguy]

i think i recognize one of those too!

 

[CompactTractorFan]

i think i recognize one of those too!

I'm sure you do.

 

[CompactTractorFan]

Some more:

"Momma's going to say, "we need a new refrigerator. Sell that rifle/pistol/ammo stash, you got when ***** took office"

"Forget a air hose Use the West Virginy Hair dryer----- A Leaf Blower"

"It's a 15 gallon barrel, so its not too heavy to rassle out of the trailer after going to fill it"

"Neanderthals didn't have tractors, although they could have used them. Butchering a mammoth is hard work"

"a cheap system is an old round hair dryer on high speed ( remove the heating element ) duct tape a pool hose to it then run the other end to your "personal painting hood" .... put the hair dryer OUTSIDE in fresh air and turn it on"

"This what makes you a mechanic not a parts changer"

"JOHNTHOMAS has owned about everything but an M Series"

"When I need something at Lowes, I like to browse the hardware isle and pick up little bolts and washers and pins, and anything else that looks interesting, that I might use someday. When my wife complains, I just remind her of all the make up she has sitting on the dresser she never uses"

"The job aint complete until one of us is bleeding." It usually winds up being me"

"in the 70s, if you had a blowout of a tire on the steering axle, you might very well have died from it. without power steering, you had to have the strength of godzilla to hold on to the steering wheel when the tire let go"


"This stage of your life will be the easiest to disconnect your lifestyle from your income level. If you can put away a quarter of your income for a few years when young, you will eventually be wealthy. Then you won't have to punch a time clock five days a week any more. Accumulating savings like that becomes impossible at a later stage when you are burdened with responsibilities. Your choice ..."

"Unless you live in Cyprus"


"The Family that Tractors together, stays together"

"They have the Amber Alert when kids are kidnapped. Maybe you need to issue an Orange Alert 'cause your wife is a Kubota-napper"

"For all you Vermonters, Mainiacs and New Hampshirites"

"They want universal back ground checks so start with Obumer and his right hand clown"

"When I die, I want my Google account to be Chromed"

 

[dave1949]

Good job Kyle.