What *** is your tractor?

   / What *** is your tractor? #21  
The most accurate statement on this thread. :thumbsup:
hey, it's 28 out, just waiting for things to warm up a bit...

but in my own defense, I will be rototilling this afternoon.
And my wife wants to go get vegetable plants at the local nursery, so
I must get to work too...

Ah, we must all humor our inner child from time to time lest we become stilted and too acerbic for our own good.
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #22  
The most accurate statement on this thread. :thumbsup:
hey, it's 28 out, just waiting for things to warm up a bit...

but in my own defense, I will be rototilling this afternoon.
And my wife wants to go get vegetable plants at the local nursery, so
I must get to work too...
After the last frigid storm and the 26F temps that froze all my newly planted garden plant, I am not going to even attempt replanting till at least mid to end of April. Then I will get some of those huge Walmart plants that already have tomatoes on the vines(like we did last year) to replace my frosted and frozen ones.
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #23  
After the last frigid storm and the 26F temps that froze all my newly planted garden plant, I am not going to even attempt replanting till at least mid to end of April. Then I will get some of those huge Walmart plants that already have tomatoes on the vines(like we did last year) to replace my frosted and frozen ones.

Haste makes waste. Been there, but about 2 months later. :laughing:
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #24  
Its warming up here, supposed to be above 60.. We have been so cold for so long.. Got mulch coming for today. and maybe rock Friday, Should be able to work some this weekend if it doesn't rain too much. Winter seemed to overstay its welcome around here.
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #25  
Tractor ***.....hard to tell. Mine has a dipstick as well as a receiving hitch/coupler in the back......can be a hard worker at times but seems to get cranky once a month???? Go figure......not sure!:confused2:
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #26  
Sexy to a Tractor

Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and
sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere.

Billy Bob performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left.
He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips,
revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt. Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his
stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, What the heck are you doing, Billy Bob?
Jeez, Cletus, ya scared the bejeezers out of me, says an embarrassed Billy Bob. But me'n the Ol' Lady been havin trouble lately
in the bedroom d'partment, and the therapist suggested I do 'something sexy to a tractor'.
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #27  
Most of ours have always been female. Lucy and I grew up together and spent many long hot summer days in the hay field. She even attended high school with me several times. I still have her as she is..... part of the family. Then there was Lucille. What a dolly! She was a bigger girl but boy could she cook, especially after we turned the fuel screw a few times.

We have had several square balers over the years and I named them all Mabel. Because she "may bale" today or she "may not".
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #28  
Sexy to a Tractor

Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and
sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere.

Billy Bob performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left.
He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips,
revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt. Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his
stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, What the heck are you doing, Billy Bob?
Jeez, Cletus, ya scared the bejeezers out of me, says an embarrassed Billy Bob. But me'n the Ol' Lady been havin trouble lately
in the bedroom d'partment, and the therapist suggested I do 'something sexy to a tractor'.

Very funny!!!:laughing:
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #29  
My Baby John is a girl, and a very pretty one.

But, sad to report, I think she's been spayed. :( I've parked her overnight by my buddy's 420 CAT on more than one occasion, hoping for the best ... but, nuthin'. Dang.
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #30  
What did John Deere say to Allis Chalmers on the night they were married?? Goodnight Allis Deere!:laughing:
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #31  
JD lawn mower is "bessie", swmbo even uses the name now. :laughing: (And Boone...:thumbsup:)
 
   / What *** is your tractor?
  • Thread Starter
#32  
MY JD is a guy, because it is so useful and sexy!

I can just see the new JD ad campaign now,
our own Texas gal starring in a video
shot in her barn, gazing at some six packed hunk taking
off his sweaty shirt and stepping out of his six series JD.
And she smiles like Madonna and quietly remarks: he sure is useful...
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #33  
MY JD is a guy, because it is so useful and sexy!

I can just see the new JD ad campaign now,
our own Texas gal starring in a video
shot in her barn, gazing at some six packed hunk taking
off his sweaty shirt and stepping out of his six series JD.
And she smiles like Madonna and quietly remarks: he sure is useful...

OMG! What a vision!
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #34  
After the last frigid storm and the 26F temps that froze all my newly planted garden plant, I am not going to even attempt replanting till at least mid to end of April. Then I will get some of those huge Walmart plants that already have tomatoes on the vines(like we did last year) to replace my frosted and frozen ones.

Might work for you, Gary, but where I am, of you wait that late, then summer burns up your crops before they get to produce. It is a gamble to plant early, but if the freezes don't happen, one gets plenty to cook, freeze, can and share. And you for sure will not get heirloom plants tthat late into April. (Of course, I dounbt Walmart has heirloom anyway. They might even get their plants from China! :shocked:)
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #35  
MY JD is a guy, because it is so useful and sexy!

I can just see the new JD ad campaign now,
our own Texas gal starring in a video
shot in her barn, gazing at some six packed hunk taking
off his sweaty shirt and stepping out of his six series JD.
And she smiles like Madonna and quietly remarks: he sure is useful...

Ok, Daugen, now I need a cold shower, since I am all hot and bothered! Must be something about a tractor, a hunk and removing a sweaty shirt. And yes, the tractor MAKES that ad!
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #36  
well it's pretty eazy to tell all my tractor and lawn mower are female and i ride them alot:drink::dance1:
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #37  
Now I know the IH guys think the JD guys are all "girlie" but then we wouldn't want to go there, right? :D

Are some of yours male and some female, like kids?...

I have a JD and IH and was always under the impression that the Kubota guy's were " girlie " did you ever notice when that bright orange fades it has a "pinkish" tone.

Sent from my iPad using TractorByNet
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #38  
Being that I spend so much time with my tractors, I have girls. Betsy, Wilma, Sally.....
 
   / What *** is your tractor? #39  
Wow I never gave it a thought, she gets awfully dirty when I run her!:thumbsup:
 

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