Thoughts on Sexual Harrasment...

[oldballs]

Today's folk are too sensitive to everything. In the old days women knew how to take care of themselves. If a guy made nasty comments, the women would just ignore it or cuss him out. This falls into the same category as bullying as i see it. We grew up with "unkind" comments that were mostly ignored....such as shorty, skinny, fatty. If it bothered one enough he/she took physical action to best of his ability which usually solved the problem.......end of story. We ( also I) saw a lot of such things in the Army, on the sports field, in the classroom, at recess, in construction gangs.

Of course when there is drinking, it gets worse. In the current culture the money in lawsuits ( or other obtuse reason) is the driving force.

I do believe in being "Kind" and not being a sexist "A-hole". " Huh?, "What'd I say?"

 

[John Fitzgerald]

It is getting so the most qualified men to run things will not even run for elected office, for fear of some trumped up thing of 10-40 years ago coming back to haunt them. If not convicted of something, then not guilty. Will legislatures of the future be comprised of large majorities of women?

 

[kenmac]

Things such as this has caused me not to even want to hold the door open for, or offer assistance to women anymore.

 

[Industrial Toys]

Maybe men should go on strike for a day or two. Let it be dark and cold!

 

[ultrarunner]

Part of the problem is that most people don't know what sexual harassment is when they see it. It's not one remark, one picture, one dirty joke; it's actually a series of actions that affect another person negatively. This definition is close enough, given the explanation:




NOTE: There is a difference between sexual harassment, sexual discrimination, and sexual assault/battery. You can get away with some things under the definition of sexual harassment, but you start groping, touching, pinching, slapping, etc. and you are in deep doo doo and probably better look for another job. Commenting on someone's blouse is not sexual harassment, although done continually, in a sexual context, may be.

The example given above, about the blouse, is, in my opinion, way out of line.

Back in the 80's my cousin worked for a large Telcom... she wore a blouse that had a floral "Leaf" pattern on it one Fall Day...

One of the managers said nice blouse... "I would like to rake those leaves" She said... did you really say what I think you said... he replied that he wasn't thinking and apologized... they worked together for many years... never an issue, incident or any other problem...

I can only imagine what could happen today since so much seems to be on perception... by the way... she never did wear the blouse to work again... not low cut or revealing either.

 

[tcreeley]

It is like cleaning the barn. Good to do every so often. Changing our behavior is good for us, good for society.

I used to know a guy who was a coach. He couldn't help himself (he didn't try to either). Whenever he was working with a female, teen to adult who was good looking he would start to flirt - crudely at times. - I remember over hearing one woman say to another when he walked away- "He is like a lot of guys who think they have to say something." 3 days later both women were both gone for good.

Save the sexual behavior for dating situations, spouses.
It has no place elsewhere.

 

[3930dave]

Part of the problem is that most people don't know what sexual harassment is when they see it. It's not one remark, one picture, one dirty joke; it's actually a series of actions that affect another person negatively. This definition is close enough, given the explanation:




NOTE: There is a difference between sexual harassment, sexual discrimination, and sexual assault/battery. You can get away with some things under the definition of sexual harassment, but you start groping, touching, pinching, slapping, etc. and you are in deep doo doo and probably better look for another job. Commenting on someone's blouse is not sexual harassment, although done continually, in a sexual context, may be.

The example given above, about the blouse, is, in my opinion, way out of line.

It's arrived at a stage where (Pence in mind) the safe play is to only discuss work-related material. Period.

Beyond that, stick to Name, Rank, Serial #.

Even the weather may not be a safe topic....... "It's hot out there" could be misconstrued.......

Rgds, D.

 

[3930dave]

Some years later, I met her out and about and asked her bluntly why.
She said that she didn't want to report it but an HR rep had been near and heard me and had threatened her with disciplinary action if she didn't report my behavior.

In the Sales game, that's known as Demand Creation.....

Real problems should always be addressed.

Like the current thread on Workplace Safety illustrates, these bureaucracies take on a life of their own.... the relevant staff often have a vested interest in over-reporting events - your example shows how people in that position can be quite willing to enhance their job security by deliberately screwing with somebody's life/career/finances.....

Ironically, what that HR person did was would probably be classed as bullying today, on both counts.

Rgds, D.

 

[LD1]

Having fun.....flirting.....joking.......

And harassment......

They are blurring the lines big time.

Men being prosecuted for harassment, when nothing more than innocent flirting is all that really happened.

Women claim they are equal to men.....and this big #metoo movement is proving otherwise. Always playing the poor female victim card.

Can't have it both ways. You want equality or not?

 

[blackrams]

This is a weapon that is out of control. Short story.

At one time, I was a Production Manager I had a large organization. It should be noted that I'm a stickler for timeliness. I don't need people who can't be at work on time. If you can't be where you're supposed to be when you're supposed to be there, someone else has to pick up the slack. It's not their job to do your job. Regardless, upon taking this position, I met with the entire organization and let them know of my expectations. I don't expect anything of anyone else that I am not willing to do myself.

Anyway, I had a female employee who could never seem to make it to work on time. She was "office staff" so, her tardiness didn't slow down the production line often but, there were times the "floor" needed information and needed it now or the whole process came to a grinding halt. This person was not a direct report to me but, her boss was.

Noting the issues of her tardiness, we met with her and after discussing her "issues" decided to move things around and adjust her report time to thirty minutes later in the morning. She was happy and the situation was resolved, for a while. Two weeks later, the same old routine started up again. This went on for over a month. So, I called another meeting with all parties involved. Another adjustment was made, now she's reporting one hour later than when I first took over. But, I'm now at my limit. The organization is not responsible for this "lady's" home issues. Get it together or find somewhere else to work. She was advised of this.

Two weeks later, we're right back into the same problem. As she enters the office area, I'm standing in front of her boss as she walks in. I told her boss to address the issue in her performance review and to start taking action, I made sure she heard what I said. We are at the point that I will not accept further tardiness. It should be noted that previous bosses had allowed her tardiness behavior for years. But, I had held two meetings and made tried to be flexible. That was over.

Her boss met with her again that day.

Two days later she filed sexual harassment charges against me.

I was suspended from work and every female employee in the organization was interviewed. No bad reports but, still I'm in hot water. HR is on my butt. I get called in and interviewed by an all female staff from HR. I have no idea where all these supposed harassment accusations by this employee are coming from but, I stand my ground. As it turns out, the complaint never mentions the initial problem and the direct supervisor was never interviewed. That direct supervisor was a male. When it was all said and done, they interviewed her boss and I was cleared of all charges. But, the problem was never solved. She was transferred to another area (not reporting to me or her former boss) and just as I expected, she returned to her old ways and was never at work on time.

Her new boss was scared to do anything about it and her lack of timeliness and performance affected his department. There is no winning such situations.