neighbors

[ch1ch2]

I was reading here on TBN of headlines related to domestic issues.
I wanted to give my two cent in but realized I would be highjacking the thread.
So I am starting this one.

I have a property on a lake with the same neighbor for 27 years. In those years we have gotten along well. In those years I have gone out of my way to help them.
Things I have done are way too numerous to list here. They in return have feed us at times. I can not think of anything other than the 1 or 2 meals a year my wife and I received.

Again there are way too many things to list that I have done for them over the years, but those were things I did NOT expecting anything in return. I did them just because I like to help.

Well, lately the lady of the house has got very demanding. Telling us what plants we can plant next to HER fence. What things we can have in our yard (so it does not look trashy).

So much for the back ground. Now for the issue.

She moved her mail box to in front of my property. No problem it is on county property. She did not like the mail delivery vehicle making the tire marks in front of her house. This not being my primary home location, I have never put up a mail box. I got a new mailbox at a very good price and decided to start receiving mail there. I put it up next to her mail box so the mail carrier could easily do their job.

Well, I did not realize I needed her permission to put a mail box in front of my property on the county road.
She said: I had to move it to the other end of my property 300 feet away. My mail box was ugly. She could not weed around her mail box.

There was about 3 feet between the boxes.

I told her I would not move it.

We went on vacation out of state and a neighbor call and told us the mail box was down. Another neighbor went over cleaned up the mess and called the Sheriff to report the hit and run. (I have a lot of really good neighbors).

We returned from vacation and did a little inspecting of the box. The wood 4x4 post was broken and there were black marks on the lower part of the box. I looked at the marks and matched them up with the bumper of her husbands golf cart.

The neighbor with the issue came running over and said: Oh, what happened to your mail box? I saw it down.

We told her that the Sheriff was called and that we would know for sure what happened in a few hours when we have time to look at the security camera footage.

She said what camera? She was unaware of the camera system we have had for the past 12 years. Well several things were said but she lost it and said if we put it back up the next time she would bomb it.

I know this is getting long.

The end result was the Sheriff was called again and she has not talked to us since. She gives us ugly glaring hate filled stares. Other than the stares, it has been nice, not having her interrupt me working, and yelling at me to come over and help her with things.

 

[Industrial Toys]

I'm surprised you didn't see her for what she was earlier.

I spoke about facades recently. Accomodate people and they can be the nicest, behind their facade. Throw a little grit into the works and you find out who they really are.

No one should ever be a door mat anyway. Nothing good ever comes of that, and certainly no self dignity.

 

[Jstpssng]

You might want to mention to them that it’s a federal offense to tamper with US Mail, and your mailbox falls under that umbrella. MAILBOX VANDALISM ISN’T A JOKE

 

[4570Man]

I’d make her move her box back to her property. With both places on the same side of the road there’s zero reason hers should be in front your house.

 

[jaxs]

If you are trying to figure a way to fix the situation,there is none. So sad to see it happen but people do loose their marbles and change behavior. Her spouse might be embarrassed and/or confused by her actions so hasn't come to you about it.

 

[Industrial Toys]

It's not usually how it works. Cops respond to a couple fighting only to have the couple turn on the cops. More of that stupid family "pride" thing.

 

[Rebeldad1]

whatever you do remember its not going to get better. best to move on

 

[Industrial Toys]

I have some neighbor issues mostly over differing beliefs concerning hunting. As hard as it is for me to do it, I still wave, and he the same when we see each other. I detest phoniness, but somehow feel this course of behavior is best.

 

[Budweiser John]

If you are trying to figure a way to fix the situation,there is none. So sad to see it happen but people do loose their marbles and change behavior. Her spouse might be embarrassed and/or confused by her actions so hasn't come to you about it.

Exactly. Perhaps a mild stroke, recently diagnosed health issue, or dementia. With respect to the mail box question, both you and she have a legal right to put the boxes wherever as long as it falls under the USPS guidelines and in most cases rural mail carriers appreciate boxes being clustered to save stops. As has been stated, wonton destruction of a rural mail box is a Federal Offense.
I’de give the old? girl plenty if ‘cold shoulder’ and move on with life unless a sibling, spouse, or family member comes forward with an
Apology or explanation of the change in behavior.

B. Jihn

 

[ovrszd]

I have a neighbor that was widowed 3 years ago. After Steve died I cared for her for a year. Told Steve I would. Then I weaned her. Took almost a year.

I wonder if your historic interactions with your neighbor and her current behavior are two separate issues?

Sounds like maybe your other neighbors and you have already started an alliance against this neighbor?

How old is the offending neighbor?