Retirement home search started

[ultrarunner]

Very true… some of us are still shell shocked from the days of multiple overbids…

Several of my coworkers sold their homes for good money but realized unless they were cashing out and moving out of state the homes they wanted were also very expensive…

 

[gsganzer]

We made a cash offer on the modern farmhouse, but I don't think we're the only bidders. We'll see where this road takes us. This part of the ride is stressful!

They came back with a counteroffer and we have agreement, so we've signed a contract. This will be exciting!!!

 

[kenmbz]

They came back with a counteroffer and we have agreement, so we've signed a contract. This will be exciting!!!

Wow, congratulations!

I hope this works out perfect for you.

 

[dmccarty]

I still harbor bad feelings about my parents and in-laws regarding their stuff.

Neither addressed their collections of stuff. It left bad feelings between some family members in addition to lost time and money on others.

Part of any home search should include the right sizing/downsizing aspect of the stage of life and the property itself.

I will have to clear out my parents house one day. I have talked with my parents about this, and while it will be work, it will be what it will be. There is a plan in place to get it done and it won't be fun that is for sure. The hard part will be going through their stuff. That is a statement about the emotional aspect of the work, not the physical.

We have had the conversation, and I see it covered in various YouTube videos and "print" media regarding thinks that parents own. Often parents or grand parents want to hand down furniture which kids or grandkids don't won't or don't have room. Getting one's head around this fact is hard for some I think.

I have some stuff, and there is stuff at my parent's house I would like to keep, but I simply don't have the room. It is mostly furniture that my grandfather made. I really don't want too have the furniture pass outside the family but I don't think we will have space for it all.

My good friends were angry at her parents for not downsizing and leaving a “mess” to sort when the parents both passed within months of each other…

I was hard on her and said nothing says you can’t walk away or call the realtor to handle it…

My brother gets several of these listings every year and he does it all and the heirs get a check.

Often the heirs are distant or unable to travel or overseas.

Just did one where the son is in England… made one visit and turned everything over to my brother and was very pleased with the result…

Part of my plan is to donate stuff to local charities near my parents house. Some of this has been done already but more will be done when it is time. The real estate broker has been chosen for the most part and that is how the house will be cleaned up and sold. My parents house is in an area with lots of old people so there are people who deal with estates.

For years, I used furniture I got from the condo of a man who had died and the family just wanted the stuff gone. Did not cost me a penny and it was good furniture. Heck, it was better than the stuff we have now, but we did not like the look of the free furniture so donated it and bought what we liked.

I do not understand being angry at parents for not downsizing. My parents really struggled with the idea of moving and it was just too much for them to do mentally. We moved quite a bit as a family, so for better or worse, they knew what it takes to move. I looked at what it would cost to pack their stuff and move it but even that was too much for them to handle. At some point, people just want to stay and not go any where. That is part of the No Go Years phase. I have seen this with family members. They wanted to move at some level but the positives and negatives where just too much for them to make a decision. I keep saying if you can't make a decision on moving, then the right decision is to do nothing.

Now I am saying to myself and wifey.

 

[kenmbz]

We hired a dumpster for my FIL for a month.
He never put anything in it, we finally put the old stove that was out back in, not much else.

My Uncle is the opposite, he has a list of who gets what that is pages long..

 

[part-time-Farmer-NC]

Wifey and I discuss moving to another location/farm on and off. This area has grown way too fast. I can find dozens of reasons to leave. The one thing that makes it hard for both of us is this is her family's land since 1934. We sold some of my family land (for over 150 yrs) to my son. So that wasn't bad at all. It's mostly idle thoughts as both our families are ingrained here.

We miss the ole country ways. I often look for blocks of property 50-100 acres that we could build up to meet our needs. We consolidated 3 houses to one and have lots of stuff that was in each.

So far not enough to start making the way to do it. Not looking forward to all it entails to buy/fix up/move.

 

[gsganzer]

My goal is to seriously purge when we move. I can already see a battle brewing with my wife. She doesn't realize it, but the clutter she complains about mainly comes from her. Even my 2 girls agree. Sure, I have my share, but I'm a lot more likely to throw something away, donate or sell it when it doesn't serve a purpose. She invents reasons to keep it.

I don't plan to burden our kids with all that stuff when we pass. My parents had a lot of things that had meaning to them, but they don't for me. Sure, there are some heirloom things we'll keep, but many of the other things, like furniture, don't fit our needs or style. It's tough to get rid of those things too.

 

[ultrarunner]

My plan was 5 rural close in acres with home and 40x120 finished shop… everything consolidated and organized and thinning the car collection along the way…

The place sold for 1.2 in 2012 and now would be triple… so not in the cards for me…

I’m afraid I may turn into a YouTube video made by my nephew tracking down the collection… if done right he will make out well…

 

[ultrarunner]

My grandfather’s aunt born 1900, a widow 3 times had no children and was the sweetest 80 year old still paying her bills in person driving her 1959 Rambler to do so.

When it came time to downsize to retirement home is the only time I saw her upset/cry and it was because people in her presence said are we getting a dumpster to clear out all the junk from her immaculate little home… incredibly insensitive.

I help her move and offered to store anything she wanted in a empty 12x20 garage I still have… she was happy.

She got settled and made new friends and twice asked for something from storage…

As time went on I let her know of people in need… she gave her dining table to one… her dishes and kitchen items to another and so on…

She was happy to give to anyone in need… the thank you note from one of the families meant the world to her…

She said to me later her furniture and belongings were not garbage to be hauled away… saying people that would say such never experienced hard times.

She married her high school sweetheart the eve before he was deployed in WWI and he was killed in action… she remarried in 1941 and he died in action in WWII

In 1950 she married a widow 25 years her senior and had 5 wonderful years until he passed… the third husband was my grandfathers uncle.

 

[ericm979]

They came back with a counteroffer and we have agreement, so we've signed a contract. This will be exciting!!!

Wow that was fast! It sounds like a really nice place.

We're packing for our move. My wife and I are not too different in how we keep vs get rid of stuff. I'm sure some of the stuff I want to keep puzzles her, and I wonder about some of the stuff she's keeping. But I'd rather pay for more space in the moving van than argue over it.

 

[ultrarunner]

I’ve learned parting with things varied from paying someone to haul it away, come and get it free to lucrative selling.

My friends are down sizing and called a highly recommended buyer… he walked through and said $1200 and cleared in 48 hours… she declined.

Over the course of 3 weekends with the help of her teenage neighbor she realized more than 20k, made some friends very happy with gifts and donated a few items…

She was paid well for her time and the teenager got a percentage of every sale…

 

[riptides]

I will have to clear out my parents house one day. I have talked with my parents about this, and while it will be work, it will be what it will be. There is a plan in place to get it done and it won't be fun that is for sure. The hard part will be going through their stuff. That is a statement about the emotional aspect of the work, not the physical.

We have had the conversation, and I see it covered in various YouTube videos and "print" media regarding thinks that parents own. Often parents or grand parents want to hand down furniture which kids or grandkids don't won't or don't have room. Getting one's head around this fact is hard for some I think.

I had a better relationship with my parents then with my in-laws. My mom was clear on what she would like passed down or on. Thank goodness for that. It made it easier when my girls stepped in to help, turned a sad time into a better time.

My in-laws, not so much, I still have some of their stuff in my house. My MIL is still alive but back in FLA. Her stuff is still here. I am a patient person but the burden is on my family due to inactions on the in-laws part. Some people just cannot let go.

 

[ultrarunner]

It can be mental… I bought a home that was in process of condemnation in a nice neighborhood… nothing wrong with the home other than home and grounds became a dump… picture all the room piled solid 3’ high from end to end and back yard even more…

Me buying the property reset the clock and one 30 yard dumpster a week for 9 weeks cleared the property…

There were chest freezers the 9 year old granddaughter didn’t even know existed full of steak and hamburger…

95% was simply garbage… the other 5% were done bonafide antiques and tools… got a like new gold in color 1950’s Craftsman Table saw I still use.

 

[nforktractor]

When parents or friends pass, always difficult on figuring out what to do. My Mom grew up in Missouri, family moved to northern Virginia in the late 30s. In 1998 she decided she was moving home, back to Missouri. Helped load up a rental box truck, 30 boxes or more and took them all the way out to Springfield MO where she rented 3 bedroom brick rambler. In 2013 she passed and I went out there, sorted things out with funeral home, etc., rented a box truck and brought back all of those boxes, she never opened more than a couple. After a few years I invited some friends over and we went through all of the boxes, nothing exciting, hand tools and such, and everybody got parting gifts!

 

[kenmbz]

My father was the opposite, he sold or got rid of everything and didn't ask my brother or I about any thing. So a lot of my grand fathers and my tools disappeared...

 

[gsganzer]

The home inspection is scheduled for tomorrow. I'm not expecting them to find much of anything. Unlike when we sell our nearly 50yo house. I'm sure we'll have a lot of little things that they try to nickle and dime us on.

The good thing, if you could call it that, is on Sept 21, we were hit with a massive storm, with 70mph hail. It caused $72K in damage to our house and buildings. So, all the buildings will be getting new roofs, gutters, wind turbines, window screens, and a lot of painting and staining before we list it. At the same time all that is done, we'll try to identify any other issues that need attention and do them at the same time.

 

[ericm979]

I guess if you're going to make an insurance claim, the best time is right before you sell.

 

[Tomtint]

The wife and I have officially started the search for our retirement home. I've lived in our current place since 1997, but the city has been constantly sprawling in our direction, annexing us into city limits about 15 years ago. Now I see them running utilities, water, hydrants, sewer along the highway up to our area. Ironically, I get high speed fiber installed tomorrow after recently installing Starlink to fix my internet woes. Rumors are that big developments are coming, and a new outer loop toll road will be breaking ground around 2028.

We've gone round and round on what and where we want to settle down. We were ready to purchase our friends 114 acre place in OK when it unexpectedly became available, but ultimately, we had issues with nearby solar farms and wrapping our heads about moving to OK. We've now decided we want to remain in N. TX and have scaled back on acreage to 20- 50 acres with a house and workshop. We're focusing on an area between Bowie and Muenster TX. It's a nice area with some rolling hills and vista's and often gets termed the "Hill Country of north TX, due to its Czech influence.

We looked at two places yesterday that were very close to one of our departed TBN brethren, Jimmy Inman's place in Sunset TX. One was a 2021 custom home built in the modern farmhouse style with some really nice features, including a dog washing station. I really liked all the attention that was made to the utilities, like buried electric line, buried propane tank, all downspouts piped away etc. The walk-in utility attic with the air handlers was impressive! It also had a nice outdoor kitchen and patio, although it faces west. We'll have to figure out something with shade tree's, shade sail to make it more enjoyable. You could tell there was attention to all the details though with tall, coffered ceilings, hand scraped wood floors, tile work, counter tops etc. Even the HVAC grills were fancy. I'm trying to figure out how a redneck like me with all my game animal mounts can make it work

The second place was a little older, but it had more acreage. It had some nice upgrades, but there were other things that still needed to get upgraded. The windows were all starting to lose their seals and need replaced, the bathrooms were outdated, and the recent kitchen remodel left something to be desired. We've scratched this one off our list.

So far, the modern farmhouse is our front runner. We're going to look at 2 more places this afternoon.

The past couple years we have been looking at where we want to have our next home ( retirement location ) We have been looking primarily in the North East Fla area.. Fla is a weird place.. Unless you are in a HOA.. You may have a beautiful place but next door may have 15 broken down cars, boats and rv in the yard that are surrounded by 1k pounds of empty bud light cans.. The HOAs are a pita .. and can be expensive..but they keep that type of stuff in check. .. But I don't thing I can cope with neighbours 6 feet away. Insurance is also difficult in Fla now..as well as property taxes.. So the search continues for us right now.

 

[gsganzer]

The home inspection went well. No issues of any significance were found. We brought the side by side so we could drive the property. Pipe fence on one side, woven fence on two others and five strand barbed wire on the last. I'll probably change the five strand to help keep the feral hogs out, although, I love shooting pigs.

 

[dmccarty]

I had a better relationship with my parents then with my in-laws. My mom was clear on what she would like passed down or on. Thank goodness for that. It made it easier when my girls stepped in to help, turned a sad time into a better time.

My in-laws, not so much, I still have some of their stuff in my house. My MIL is still alive but back in FLA. Her stuff is still here. I am a patient person but the burden is on my family due to inactions on the in-laws part. Some people just cannot let go.

My parents and my father in law were/are clear on what to do. MIL, well, that is/was a nightmare but not about getting rid of things.
Some people just can't let go. It is hard. The wifey and I have been talking about this for years. One day, we realized that 95% of what we own is just not worth anything. We have some things that some in the family MIGHT want. I hope they want soem of it since it is stuff from my grandparents. Our stuff is really a who cares. Except for maybe a few things.

I think some people think there junk is treasure that others will treasure. Or they hold on to stuff because to get rid of it a sign the end is near. And then some people are just hoarders.