Groan 3; the Sequel

[Pixguy]

 

[Pixguy]

 

[Pixguy]

 

[Pixguy]

My niece just called and asked if I would loan her
$300.00 to help her pay her rent. Those who know
me, know that I'm always willing to help out
friends and family. I told her to give me some
time to think about it and I would call her back.
Before I called her back, her Mom called and told
me that my niece was lying and not to give her
the money. She goes on to say that the real
reason she wanted the $300.00 was to get her
boyfriend out of jail so she could be under the
same roof as him for his birthday. I thought about
it for a minute and decided to give her the
$300.00 because we all need help at times. So, I
called and told her to come and get the money. A
couple of hours later, I get a call from the Tarrant
County Jail. It was my niece crying, screaming
and asking why I gave her counterfeit money. My
response…so you and your boyfriend could be
under the same roof for his birthday!

 

[alexpops]

HMM sounds more like a Montenegrin than Russian to me.

A chilly fall morning on Volga, boat in fog. Marusja in the boat is rowing so hard her braids are sweating. In the bow of the boat Ivan Vasiljevic comfortable laying down, smoking papirosa.
Another boat coming down the river, Kuzma Trofimyc rowing. Asks Kuzma:" Where are you headed, Ivan Vasiljevic, this early in the morning?"Ivan Vasiljevic blows out smoke: "The wife is in labor, I am taking her to the hospital."

 

[i7win7]

An angry wife to her husband on phone: "Where the hell are you?"
Husband: "Darling, you remember that jewelery shop where you saw the diamond necklace and totally fell in love with it, and I didn't have money that time, and I said 'Baby it'll be yours one day'?"
Wife, with a smile and blushing: "Yeah I remember that my love!"
Husband: "I'm in the pub just next to that shop."

 

[bcp]

HMM sounds more like a Montenegrin than Russian to me.

This made me think we need some Mondegreens posted.

Anyone know some good ones?


Bruce

 

[Jstpssng]

First I had to look the term up.

When we were young, Tanya Tucker had a hit "Delta Dawn." A line she sang was "Could it be a faded rose from days gone by?"

My brother insisted that wasn't what she sang; so every time the song came on he'd belt out "... a Baby rose ..."

 

[SouthernSky]

All the people ‘round Brownsville think she’s crazy.

 

[alexpops]

CCR: "Bad Moon Rising" instead of "there's a bad moon on the rise" my kid brother always belted out "there's a bathroom on the right"