Are my parents to strict?

   / Are my parents to strict? #81  
Honor your parents and obey them in the relationship you currently have as a minor living in their house. Once you finish high school and move out it is their responsibility and yours to change the relationship from authoritarian to mentor and friend. At that point you have the freedom to make all your own decisions with all the responsibility that goes with.
 
   / Are my parents to strict?
  • Thread Starter
#82  
NHmitch said:
I just thought that I would tell you quickly how my experience was joining the Air Force when I was 17. I enlisted the first day of my senior year of high school, without my mother or father knowing. I will never, ever regret making that choice, however it is not always without consequences, but neither is college, or life for that matter. The one thing I will tell you, is that the Air Force gives you a lot of pride, and they really take care of their people. They believe that retention is the key, and in order to have retention they have to keep you happy. They spend far more in a lot of cases on training you than some of the other branches do, and some do, so I am not knocking any other branch, but they have a very serious investment. Where ever we went, we always, had the best. We always had better food, better accommodations, and happier people. The Air Force will change you, but for the better. The Air Force will alos be strict, and sometimes more strick than your parents. If you don't clean you room in the air force, you are going to basically get grounded with chores. If you bounce checks, or party too much, you are going to have to sit down with your First Sergeant, or Chief, and explain why, and possibly get ordered to fix things. You have to answer for where you are, when, and why most of the time outside of a 50 mile radius. Having that said, within 6 months of going to basic training, (BMT), I was landing in Italy, after have been assigned to a base in Mountain Home Idaho, on the other side of the country where I grew up. My first year in I served as a crew member on a British AWACS radar aircraft over Bosnia, Croatia, and Hungary. I worked with, and made long lasting friendships with Italian, Spanish, British, and German troops, who were all my age. My days off were spent walking through Venice, Milan, Florence, Austria, Germany, and the ALPS. I spet the rest of my career traveling the world, and seeing so many different cultures. Some places were bad, but I learned about the world from them, and about people, and life. I was injured, and I am not the same physically and I have limitations and scars, but mentally, I have lived a thousand times over, and I would never, for anything in the world give up my experience in the military. One day I would be here, the next morning I would be on a plane landing in Europe, were I would have breakfast, again, then to the middle east, where I would have breakfast again. I have watched the sun set around the globe, and I have swum in the North Atlantic Ocean , the Pacific Ocean, the Adriatic Sea, the Persian Gulf, and the Mediterranean. I have watched the sun set half way around the world, and watched it rise on the other side. You will never regret what you get out of the Air Force, and your parents will always love us. If your parents do not agree, well just remind them of the bible, "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.( John 3:16)" I wish you the best, and your have your world to explore!

Thank you for sharing that. That sounds like something I would love to do.
 
   / Are my parents to strict? #83  
The reason my parents are like that is because they don't want me to be "part of the world" as they say.

I feel for you. Your statement above is the most telling that I've read in this thread. As a parent to 3 young kids (oldest is 5), I want to protect them at all times, but being "part of the world" is part of growing up and maturing into an adult. I know the JW issue is the driving force of that desire to shut out most of the world on you, but in my mind if a religious belief no longer makes sense once you've opened your eyes to the world, that is saying something about the belief.

I have the greatest respect for the men and women who serve their countries. I suspect you're only considering this option as a means of escape. I don't think this is a valid reason to make such a noble decision. It will get you out and away from the situation, but make sure it's a good fit for who you are. I wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes before they shot me or kicked my butt out the door!

It sounds like the choices your parents made are not the same choices you want to make. My ex-sister in-law was in the same boat, grew up in a JW family and made the choice not to follow the choices her parents laid out for her. Eventually they reconciled somewhat, but it was always a strained relationship. No matter what you chose in respect of the armed forces, if you don't follow the path your parents set for you, it's going to be a bumpy road. That may just have to be a fact of life for you because it is your life to live.
 
   / Are my parents to strict? #84  
"If a religious belief no longer makes sense once you've opened your eyes to the world, that is saying something about the belief."

+1
 
   / Are my parents to strict? #85  
Do NOT join the military unless that's what YOU WANT to do.

Do not join the military if you can't take orders, especially if those orders sound stupid. (As long as they're not un-safe during peacetime, or aren't against the laws of armed conflict.)

Do not join the military if you are not willing to die, be injured, or be crippled supporting the decisions of our government.

Do not join the military if you aren't willing to kill people to save your life, the lives of your fellow members, (easy choices) or to support the decisions of our government (the hard choice).

Do not join the military if you can't handle being crammed into an open dormitory sleeping and working with 50 other very strange people for at least 8 weeks. Absolute zero privacy is something that a lot of home schooled people have a problem with.

Do not join the military if being divorced from your parents is too big of a hardship.

If none of that is a problem, good luck, and I hope you serve proudly and well.

I didn't have any of those problems when I joined back in 1977. I joined out of a sense of patriotic duty, an opportunity to have a decent paying job, and a way to fund my college education. The only thing I was "escaping from" was unemployment and homelessness. I didn't get to see my parents more than a week or two every few years. I did 22 years until I ran into an inability to continue to support the decisions of our government and chose to retire. Now I support and defend the Constitution against domestic enemies, mostly badly elected ones. :laughing:
 
   / Are my parents to strict?
  • Thread Starter
#86  
kiotiken said:
I feel for you. Your statement above is the most telling that I've read in this thread. As a parent to 3 young kids (oldest is 5), I want to protect them at all times, but being "part of the world" is part of growing up and maturing into an adult. I know the JW issue is the driving force of that desire to shut out most of the world on you, but in my mind if a religious belief no longer makes sense once you've opened your eyes to the world, that is saying something about the belief.

I have the greatest respect for the men and women who serve their countries. I suspect you're only considering this option as a means of escape. I don't think this is a valid reason to make such a noble decision. It will get you out and away from the situation, but make sure it's a good fit for who you are. I wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes before they shot me or kicked my butt out the door!

It sounds like the choices your parents made are not the same choices you want to make. My ex-sister in-law was in the same boat, grew up in a JW family and made the choice not to follow the choices her parents laid out for her. Eventually they reconciled somewhat, but it was always a strained relationship. No matter what you chose in respect of the armed forces, if you don't follow the path your parents set for you, it's going to be a bumpy road. That may just have to be a fact of life for you because it is your life to live.

Yeah, I don't want to make the same choices my parents did in reference to being a witness. Joining the military and having a way out is a plus, but I'd really like to experience being a firefighter in the military. Just haven't made the decision, stay civil or go military yet. I'm going to give it a lot of thought first.
 
   / Are my parents to strict?
  • Thread Starter
#87  
Dr_Zinj said:
Do NOT join the military unless that's what YOU WANT to do.

Do not join the military if you can't take orders, especially if those orders sound stupid. (As long as they're not un-safe during peacetime, or aren't against the laws of armed conflict.)

Do not join the military if you are not willing to die, be injured, or be crippled supporting the decisions of our government.

Do not join the military if you aren't willing to kill people to save your life, the lives of your fellow members, (easy choices) or to support the decisions of our government (the hard choice).

Do not join the military if you can't handle being crammed into an open dormitory sleeping and working with 50 other very strange people for at least 8 weeks. Absolute zero privacy is something that a lot of home schooled people have a problem with.

Do not join the military if being divorced from your parents is too big of a hardship.

If none of that is a problem, good luck, and I hope you serve proudly and well.

I didn't have any of those problems when I joined back in 1977. I joined out of a sense of patriotic duty, an opportunity to have a decent paying job, and a way to fund my college education. The only thing I was "escaping from" was unemployment and homelessness. I didn't get to see my parents more than a week or two every few years. I did 22 years until I ran into an inability to continue to support the decisions of our government and chose to retire. Now I support and defend the Constitution against domestic enemies, mostly badly elected ones. :laughing:

I can take orders.

My future career choice has the same consequences, but there not based on the decisions of the government. If they were I could still handle it.

If I absolutely had to, to protect my life or my fellow members I could.

I'd adapt to being crammed in a dormitory with a lot of other people for eight weeks.

For me it would being away from family would be hard, but I could get through it.
 
   / Are my parents to strict? #88  
Yeah, I don't want to make the same choices my parents did in reference to being a witness. Joining the military and having a way out is a plus, but I'd really like to experience being a firefighter in the military. Just haven't made the decision, stay civil or go military yet. I'm going to give it a lot of thought first.
If/when you decide to make a change, be sure to at least try sitting down with your parents and explain exactly what you are going to do it and why you are doing it. They probably wont like it, but at least you tried to be a responsible adult in explaining what you are going to do and allowing them to see your side of the story and hopefully they will stay in communication with you.

Aaron Z
 
   / Are my parents to strict?
  • Thread Starter
#89  
aczlan said:
If/when you decide to make a change, be sure to at least try sitting down with your parents and explain exactly what you are going to do it and why you are doing it. They probably wont like it, but at least you tried to be a responsible adult in explaining what you are going to do and allowing them to see your side of the story and hopefully they will stay in communication with you.

Aaron Z

Yes, I was going to do that.
 
   / Are my parents to strict? #90  
Yes, I was going to do that.


I'll add this: no matter what direction that conversation takes, hold your temper, stay calm, and keep a steady voice. Do not let what will no doubt be a stressful situation escalate into ... well... into anything that will permanently affect the family relationship.


.
 

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