Sounds like a bad situation all around. Hope everything works out. Seeing as how that is a pintle hitch trailer, I'd have said NO plain and simple to towing that, even if my job depended on it. Did that once with a 14K pintle hitch loaded with a Ditch Witch and it was down right scary. Pintle hitch trailers over 10K are medium duty truck territory, period.
I've long said that loads like that should ONLY be towed by a medium duty truck, but most folks don't listen. They think if the manufacturer says a light duty truck can pull 20K then that's what they'll pull with it. The reason the tow ratings are climbing so high is for no other reason than to sell more trucks. It seems like the only thing they base this on nowadays is power. They want to be better than the other brand, only care about liability enough to make sure it's on the edge of being safe.
Almost as bad are the 1/2 ton trucks rated to tow over 11,000lbs these days. The may have plenty of power and huge brakes, but last time I checked still have very soft springs, relatively light frames, and don't weigh that much. As I said in another thread, my '88 F-250 is only 'rated' to tow something like 7-8K, and it is WAY more truck than those new F-150's.
I'm guilty of sometimes towing more than I should. My father has a 3500 cab-chassis Dodge that we sometimes pull 18k with. It is rated to tow that much, but may not necessarily be safe. I think single tire gooseneck trailers (14k) are about all that a 1-ton pickup should be pulling. To some extent this coincides with the CDL laws as a 14K trailer + 10-11K truck puts you right below CDL requirements. Move up to a tandem dual 20K trailer and IMO you need minimum of a class 4-5 truck. Over 20K is class 6 and up territory.