Diesel nozzles at truck stops tend to be BIG...better flow to fill big tanks faster.
Despite what some think, there is not any industry standard for nozzle color.
Ford (maybe others) basically wants to swap out the fuel system...hence the crazy cost. I'm not at all sure if this overkill or not. Some folks seem to do just fine draining the tank and adding ATF with fresh diesel.
If you want to be conservative, don't even turn the key (or push button). Doing so will fire up fuel pumps. Call a tow truck.