Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane

   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #181  
my neighbor closest to my drive first moved in about six years ago when her dad past away and she needed to be close to her mother, so I go by and offer to dig her septic line to an old septic tank that had been there for years when I was done she said thank you and informed me the next time they had steaks on the grill there would be one there for me. glad I did not wait on it and over the years I have help her and her husband with several chores just a month ago they asked me to bore a hole for a power pole beside a shed they hired some one to build, I went up bored the hole where the husband told me to and so far they have not planted that pole. so the other day I was scrapping the drive getting it ready for some gravel and asked them if they wanted me to dress up there drive and she said no but I felt good for asking. so I guess just do it because it makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside.
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #182  
This thread re-affirms just how far a simple thank you, wave, batch of cookies or just general human decency gets you.
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #183  
For me, it's all about attitude.

I have changed my policy about helping people over the years. Maybe it's a learning process or maybe I'm just getting old & cranky. I'm happy to help some folks, others with a sense of entitlement or a attitude, are another story. I noticed several mentions of widows in the thread. I used to pretty much give them a free pass on my help. Now, they are lumped into the general policy. I have run into a number of them who seem to take delight in running down men in general, but expect them to do stuff for them for free. Like I said, for me, it's all about attitude.
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #184  
This thread re-affirms just how far a simple thank you, wave, batch of cookies or just general human decency gets you.

You bet. And getting to know good neighbors is priceless. Reminds me* of the old time neighborhood barn raising efforts.

*from history that I READ. I wasn't there :D
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #185  
Snow here is normally a holiday but the attitude is everywhere. My wife and are true locals but we live in an area of this nation where much of our population is more and more transplants. One neighbor from Rhode Island, next to them Maryland, behind them locals who are very well off, behind them couple that are world war 2 survivors from Belgium (in poor health) and the neighbor beside basically local widow also in bad health. On my other side local couple with two children they treat me like their granddaddy and an older divorced gentleman also with health issues. Oh yes past those are many others some I know and some know nothing about. Not like when I grew up as we knew everybody. Of all those the older ones have helped more than once with my tractor and glad to do so. No cash but a welcome neighbor job. Nothing major and not ongoing. Wealthy neighbor has no need of my help but if he asked would for we are decent friends. Then I have neighbor who was out of town for couple of weeks and his grass could have used cutting and I skipped it for he able to work spouse to me should have been able to ride the lawn mower and lawn is not large at all. Guess what I am saying is I have done what many here have said, those I think need help, those who help me (ones with small children and I help out each other in little ways right often so two way street, only one who I swap work with) and those who show friendship. Have another couple from New York or New Jersey have done some work for cause they needed it. It was very obvious they appreciated it and have brought us vegetables a few times. They also visit my mother in law from time to time in the Nursing Home which is worth more than all I have done for them. I do find people who have always lived in big cities that move here seem not to "understand" how much we do for ourselves nor truly appreciate it. Now there are always the leaches regardless where you are or from.

But for the OP my suggestion and it may have been made is simple: I would write a letter to each one there and not be rude but simple tell it has been your pleasure to do what you have but the cost for fuel, equipment and time along with liability is making it unaffordable. He may wish to have a dollar amount he is willing to do the work for either per time, per hour or what ever or he may wish to stop. I suspect many of the newer people have no idea why he does the work, they may think he sold the land and made tons and therefore he is doing this or such. Till you ask you don't know and bet their answers will surprise you. Then I would stand by that and stop for anyone other than myself and those you may wish to do for free or if they hire you for their drive or such. Of those I mentioned would help anyone with no expectations of being paid on an occasion. Have offer somewhat joking with the wealthy couple but that was more to prove who could cut grass the fastest, my Ferris or his Husky, lol.
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #186  
I have two neighbors. My house is about 1/4 mile back from the county road, and where my road hits the county road I have a neighbor on either side.

On one side, a hippy flatlander who ever since we bought the place has overly concerned herself with what I do with my own property (was upset I mowed and expanded the top lawn next to hers as she was wanting more trees to grow there). When I brought the tractor home a few weeks ago and was unloading she came over and said "great, now you can fix our driveway"...Not happening.

On the other side, a really nice middle aged couple. Flagged down the moving truck when we arrived and introduced themselves, said welcome, and said to let them know if we needed any help unpacking. Offered the use of their pond if I wanted to take my dogs swimming. Offered the use of their commercial zero turn mower if I didn't have a mower yet (about 5 acres of lawn on the property). Let me have 3 yards of topsoil from their pile after I removed raised garden beds and needed to re-seed lawn. They asked if they could continue using the burn pit on the border of our properties as they did with the previous owners. NO PROBLEM.

I went over last week and said if they need anything done that requires a tractor to just let me know and i'd be happy to take care of it.

Attitude and reciprocity goes a long way
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #187  
We are transplants. From all people we see from the house two of our neighbors are locals and two also transplants. There are other neighbors on the back that we see less than once a year. The guy who used to combine our beans crashed his truck and got badly hurt (no seat belts, flew out of the truck and the the truck rolled over him). One of his friends combined our beans in his behalf and all of us collected money to pay big chunk of his hospital bill. We in general help to each other even though we are more or less self sufficient.
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #188  
I live on top of a mountain in Western Md. There are two properties/farms up here. Our road is 2.5 miles to the nearest plowed blacktop road. We have seen as much as 265" of snow in a single year. we usually meet where our driveways meet at the top of the mountain and plow it out in about 3 hours or so. depending on the wind and the amount of snow.
I am very thankful for a cooperative and super neighbor.

There is also a widow that lives on the other side of the mountain ridge who I try and help as much as possible. Her road/driveway is about a mile long but I can not access it from my property but I try to help her as much as I can. In order to do so I have to plow down my 2.5 mile road and then drive the tractor on the hardtop road around the mountain and to her place. It is about a 6 mile one way trip on the tractor so it takes a while. She tries to pay me but I only accept money for the fuel and sometimes not even that.

The part that chaps my rear end about this whole thing is that there is a wind turbine company that put turbines on the ridge she lives on and they cruise right by her driveway/road when they plow with the dozer they leave on site. They never help this lady out ( although they promised her the moon when they used her property as a laydown area when they were installing the turbines. )Not only do they not help her out, they actually block her entrance when they plow and don't really care. I have talked to the dozer operator and the site foreman, for lack of a better title, about maybe helping her out a bit and possibly keeping their word and I got no where.
Karma is always a fickle B!tch !
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #189  
As for Karma, they just pissed off the wrong person!

I would spend a little time on the phone with both your senator
and your congressman and the governors office and put a bug in
their ear explaining to the three of them that:

1. you are her neighbor

a. you take the time to plow her out because they do not AFTER they
told her that they would keep plowed and and bury her driveway entrance
as they plow the access road they built on her property with their bulldozer
and she cannot do it very well if at all.

b. they being PUBLIC UTILITY/ELECTRIC/power producer in you state
are required maintain a safe workplace and the access road is
on her property which is a road maintained safely and kept open
for access by them with a dozer to plow snow to keep the access road
open to thier turbines on HER land and in the process bury her
driveway entrance which if in the event of an emergency fire and
rescue trucks would not be able to access her residence quickly
enough to respond to an emergency call from her or someone at
her home finding her in trouble.


2. that she leased her land to these bandits to let them
install their wind turbines on her land to take advantage of the
wind that crosses her mountain. and they should keep her lane open
as they use her land to make money with wind power do to the favorable
winds that cross her property.


Its time Karma saddled up and her elected represenatives came by to pay her
a friendly visit after they make one phone call to the wind farms operator and

That one phone call and letter following up on the phone call will get results.
Pissing me off gets an automatic phone call to the states attorney general
for the company that sells the faulty boiler junk I was stuck with and was told
that since the 10 day time period lapsed for the return of a remote cable that
was never used and still in box and I was not entitled to a refund and that was enough
to make me find the number for the Attorney General of the State of Connecticut and
to give them a call about this issue and 24 hours later I was called and the message was
that I could return the cable for a full refund of the purchase price.

Get the saddle blankets and get the saddle off the saddle tree for Karma as she needs to have her hooves cleaned before she takes a friendly stroll across the state to the capital.
 
   / Ethics on clearing neighbor's drive ways and private lane #190  
As I come back to this thread I too am struck by how we even have to have this conversation. There was a time that if you did a favor for someone it was returned. At a barn where we kept our horses, we stopped in one Saturday just to drop of something and then we were going to be out the door to have a date day. Well turns out one of the other boarders there had a horse colicing. Our horse trailer was there. So of course we hooked up loaded up the horse a rushed it to the vet. Horse needed emergency surgery.

A week later I am at home after work. Door bell rings. Guess who? Lady who owned the horse. Fresh baked apple pie. You better believe that went a long way.

Reminds me also that I have a friend that did a big favor for me. Need to go buy a bottle of scotch.

As Bill and Ted said.... be excellent to each other.
 

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