Lung cancer is not fun

[wjoerob]

I've seen some posts lately by people who've stopped smoking. God bless you and more power to you! My dad died a slow agonizing death from lung cancer and the treatments for it. He smoked off and on for 50 years, always joked about how he could quit whenever he wanted to -- he had done it lots of times. I just wish my last memory of him didn't have to be the one of him gasping for breath, grabbing at the oxygen mask in the hospital because he couldn't breathe with it or without it. My mom did most of the home care, cleaning him up when he soiled himself, etc., etc. I wish we could have spared her all of that. I quit smoking myself when I got married 32 years ago, and have never regretted it for a minute. How can anyone be so selfish as to believe that their habit only affects themself?

 

[kidr]

I'm truly sorry for your loss. I know your anger. I watched my father die a similar death. It's maddening to to see people we love harming themselves and making light of it. Smoking is is one of the hardest habits to break. Some say its harder than getting off heroin. I won't tell you not to be angry or sad, but I do wish you peace.

 

[Bird]

Yes, it's hard to watch loved ones die slow, agonizing deaths, but, in my opinion, it's also unfortunate that the medical profession blames all lung cancer on smoking. It's not only unfortunate, it's ridiculous. My father's mother; i.e., my paternal grandmother, died of lung cancer. She first had one cancerous lung removed, thought they got it all, but it was back in the other lung a year later. She had never smoked, was adamantly against smoking, and died a slow, agonizing death at the age of 73. One of my dad's sisters also died of lung cancer when she was 64. She had smoked just a couple of years as a young woman.

My dad, who smoked most of his life, died at the age of 80. His dad, who never smoked, died at the age of 80.

Yes, we're all going to die, some of us quick and painlessly, some of us slow and agonizingly, but you can't blame all deaths on smoking, just as you can't finance everything with tobacco taxes.

But, I'm among those who quit after smoking 47 years, I quit a little over 3 years ago, but I don't kid myself about better health because I quit smoking. It ain't gonna happen. I quit for two (well, maybe three) reasons: (1) the price got too high, (2) the house and car stay cleaner, and (3) more and more restrictions on when or where you can smoke.

 

[Dargo]

Tough, tough call. Personally, I've never smoked. Couldn't if I wanted to. Bad allergic reaction. Being my grandfather's first grandchild, he quit smoking around 1960 so my parents could bring me over to visit him and my grandmother. He was 50 at the time. He lived another 46 years. I know it sounds like a joke, but he was dead serious when he told me to do anything I could to get good friends and any relatives to quit smoking when he was on his death bed at 96. He was on oxygen and was absolutely positive that smoking for almost 30 years was the only reason he was going to die before he reached 100. Other family members who never smoked lived to be 100.

Granted, not everyone would even want to live to be 100, but it does bring up a serious point my grandfather made. He told me that his smoking was the most selfish thing he'd ever done in his life. He fed a personal desire that was more important to him, at the time, than his family. He said that because he after he learned that smoking was positively bad for him (back when he started smoking companies got by with claims that smoking was good for you and increased your lung capacity), he kept smoking even though he knew it would cause him to not be around to see his family as long as he would if he hadn't fed his personal addiction.

I have two good friends who are very young (at least that's the way I see them), in their mid 30's, and are already showing bad health signs directly related to their smoking habit. I've not said anything to them about smoking but have to wonder if I'm being a bad friend by not saying anything to them and reminding them that their personal desires and drug addiction (yes, smoking is indeed a drug addiction) is going to rob their families of time with them. Perhaps just as bad, their families will most likely have to take care of them and watch them die a slow death from cancer. Should I continue to keep quiet or try to talk them into getting their priorities straight?

 

[tallyho8]

Should I continue to keep quiet or try to talk them into getting their priorities straight?

You may as well keep quiet and stay on friendly terms with them. I know from experience that you can't talk someone into quitting smoking. They have to WANT TO QUIT before they will quit.

 

[Bird]

you can't talk someone into quitting smoking. They have to WANT TO QUIT

I agree.

smoking is indeed a drug addiction

It used to just be called a "habit", but later was deemed to be a nicotine "addiction". I won't disagree, but just how do you define "addiction". I usually thought of it as something that would cause both mental and physical discomfort upon withdrawal. However, when I quit, sure, I'd catch myself reaching for the pocket where the cigarettes used to be, only to find none there. A well ingrained "habit?". But I never suffered any physical symptoms. Maybe that was because, as mentioned above, I had decided to quit; no ifs, ands, buts, or maybes, I'd made that decision so it was final.

 

[Dargo]

You may as well keep quiet and stay on friendly terms with them. I know from experience that you can't talk someone into quitting smoking. They have to WANT TO QUIT before they will quit.

Thanks. That's pretty well what I was thinking. Sometimes it's dang hard to be a good friend. One guy in particular knows he's definitely killing himself with his 4 pack a day smoking but keeps saying "we all have to die from something". Unfortunately, he has a lovely young wife (she's 31) and three young kids. As I said, I haven't even brought up the subject with any of my friends, but I have to wonder if they are thinking about his family.

 

[beenthere]

Sorry, but I have hassled all my friends who smoked since I was in college many year ago. And also where I worked. I'd make a guess that it is affective to hassle your friends. They stayed my friends, and most of them quit smoking. Some people think they have to be polite and not suggest they don't smoke in your house or your car. I found that not to be true.

I don't get angry, and I don't say I will not be your friend if you don't quit. I just say I don't smoke, and can't stand the smell of smoke.

Also, I had a close friend who died of lung cancer, and another hunting partner who had a lung removed because of cancer. Neither of them smoked, so lung cancer can happen without the cigs. Maybe it was second-hand smoke.

 

[bigtiller]

When I am out walking (only 3 MPH) I sometimes walk past people that are outside a buisness or their home smoking. I know they can hear me huffing and puffing coming their way and I tell them to enjoy the cigs as long as they can because some day they, if they are lucky, they will be breathing just like me.

 

[tallyho8]

My two closest friends died of lung cancer. They both smoked. One also worked with asbestos for a while and then was a welder for many years. The other was a small engine mechanic in a shop that always reeked of gasoline fumes (leaded).

I'm sure there are many possible causes of cancer and the more of them we are able to avoid, the better.