loaned new trailer - broken axle

[deere755]

u-haul is cheeper than the body shop

try this
get an estimate on fixing your truck and present that to the wife and see how she feels about the u-haul,lol

The dent in my tailgate is going to cost $476 and that is with a discount because the body man is a good friend of mine. The trailer fenders I am not sure what to do there. So far Momma is supporting me on this one.

 

[gemini5362]

I rented a uhaul truck when we moved my step daugher from her apartment to her new house she had purchased. The rates for a uhaul truck were really reasonable somewhere under 75.00 a day for a 20 + footer. You could point out that by renting one of those she can have a good ramp for getting stuff into the truck. She should only have to make one or two trips and would save in gasonline and travel time. If I had to move one of my kids tomorrow even though I have a 3/4 ton truck and a 16 foot trailer I would rent another one again. Actually as I am writing this I remembered the last time I moved my son I rented a 24 foot uhaul and moved all of his stuff from a huge three bedroom house in two loads.

 

[JJT]

Well I sorta went thru the same thing this evening as you did with your friend. I loaned my truck and trailer to my step daughter so she could start moving. My pickup came home with a dent in the tailgate and both trailer fenders are bent up. I did not want to loan them out especially after reading this post but I could not be there and she has a dead line to get out of her old place. I told my wife that I did not want to let her have it and that made me the bad guy. So I gave in and now I am really upset that I did. And as most kids are she is broke with the expence of moving and getting a new place so I guess dear old Dad will have to take care of this too. I did get I am sorry. Still makes me mad as He@#.

Deere, Don't sweat the small stuff. The truck and the trailer are made to work. Those dents are beauty marks. JT

 

[shvl73]

Well my step Daughter wants to borrow my truck and trailer again to finish moving. I decided the fair thing would be for me to offer to pay for a U Haul since I can not be there to help and they are a lot better for moving anyway and I would not have to worry about my truck and trailer. Now I am really the bad guy for not wanting her to use my truck and trailer and making such an offer. She is really mad at me and I figure if she is mad long enough Momma will be mad too. Do you ever wish you could move away and not tell your kids where you moved too.

I would stand up to her and tell her to rent her own truck. I wouldn't hesitate to point out that the truck and trailer were damaged the last time you were generous enough to loan them out. I would then point out that you WERE PAYING FOR the U-Haul, that is until the ungrateful attitude. If momma is mad about it, I quickly suggest a larger U-Haul and offer your assistance in loading momma's possesions as well.

 

[gemini5362]

JJT I am with deere on this one. I dont know about his truck but mine cost over 40,000 dollars I dont like to even get scratches on the tailgate.

 

[gemini5362]

I would stand up to her and tell her to rent her own truck. I wouldn't hesitate to point out that the truck and trailer were damaged the last time you were generous enough to loan them out. I would then point out that you WERE PAYING FOR the U-Haul, that is until the ungrateful attitude. If momma is mad about it, I quickly suggest a larger U-Haul and offer your assistance in loading momma's possesions as well.

wow that is tough love. If my children or step children need to move and do not have the money to move with I am help them but then I am a pushover.


I do have a question though. Do you ever let your wife read this forum board ?

 

[shvl73]

wow that is tough love. If my children or step children need to move and do not have the money to move with I am help them but then I am a pushover.


I do have a question though. Do you ever let your wife read this forum board ?

I'm always there to help if someone needs it but, I also feel it should work both ways. There are always some that take advantage, as in deere755's case. His daughter-inlaw is angry at having a rental truck provided, without expense to her, and fails to see why she shouldn't ask to borrow something she damaged and did not repair. How could she not understand this?

The spouse has no interest in this forum, but she would agree that people need to help each other, not just some helping others.

 

[gemini5362]

I'm always there to help if someone needs it but, I also feel it should work both ways. There are always some that take advantage, as in deere755's case. His daughter-inlaw is angry at having a rental truck provided, without expense to her, and fails to see why she shouldn't ask to borrow something she damaged and did not repair. How could she not understand this?

The spouse has no interest in this forum, but she would agree that people need to help each other, not just some helping others.

I am not sure if you read the original post correctly it is not his daughter- in- law it is his stepdaughter. Having been divorced and married for the second time. I have two children of my own and my wife has two children. We were both older when we got divorced and we both have children that were in the late teens when we got married and now are in their early 20's the vast majority of disagreements that we have (although we do not have many) are over children I get very defensive about my children and my wife does hers as well. I can understand the problems that he is talking about with the wife taking sides.

As far as the step daughter being unreasonable about wanting to borrow something she damaged I am in total agreement with both of you that is totally unreasonable. Her not wanting the uhaul may have a personally reasonable explanation. We do not know what size uhaul that she is going to need if it is a 24 foot uhaul truck then she may not feel she can drive that. Even the shorter trucks with the big box can be daunting to try and drive and backup etc.

A reasonable compromise if he can afford it would be to offer to rent her a U-Haul van with a trailer. Then she is driving something comparable in size to the truck and trailer that she damaged.


I was not suprised that your wife showed no interest in these posts. Somehow I dont see the women that I know enjoying reading that their husband gives advice that includes if the mother gets unhappy just rent a bigger truck and move her out also.

 

[shvl73]

I am not sure if you read the original post correctly it is not his daughter- in- law it is his stepdaughter.

Yes, my mistake.

Having been divorced and married for the second time. I have two children of my own and my wife has two children. We were both older when we got divorced and we both have children that were in the late teens when we got married and now are in their early 20's the vast majority of disagreements that we have (although we do not have many) are over children I get very defensive about my children and my wife does hers as well. I can understand the problems that he is talking about with the wife taking sides.

I see the problem, I just don't think she's being fair to him. I think a spouse should at least try to be fair and understand. I don't think his wife is angry with him yet, maybe she sees the predicament he's being put into by her daughter and how generous he has already been. At least I hope so.

As far as the step daughter being unreasonable about wanting to borrow something she damaged I am in total agreement with both of you that is totally unreasonable. Her not wanting the uhaul may have a personally reasonable explanation. We do not know what size uhaul that she is going to need if it is a 24 foot uhaul truck then she may not feel she can drive that. Even the shorter trucks with the big box can be daunting to try and drive and backup etc.

Quite possible. Maybe she now realizes how lucky she is to have him help.

A reasonable compromise if he can afford it would be to offer to rent her a U-Haul van with a trailer. Then she is driving something comparable in size to the truck and trailer that she damaged.


I was not suprised that your wife showed no interest in these posts. Somehow I dont see the women that I know enjoying reading that their husband gives advice that includes if the mother gets unhappy just rent a bigger truck and move her out also.

I think she would laugh and realize I was kidding. We tend to try and work out our differences.

 

[patrick_g]

Unfortunately the step daughter's attitude is a sign of the times, not desirable but seen more frequently. I'm reminded of the little kid who went to the store with momma. The nice grocery man gave the kid a banana. Momma says, "Honey, now what do you say to the nice grocery man?" The kid hands the banana back to the man and says, "Peel it!"

Unfortunately, logic often does not enter into the equation when the variables include step children and a protective parent shielding the stepchild from the EVIL step parent along with the step parent walking on eggs to avoid being perceived as an evil step parent.

Not taking personal responsibility for the property of others, especially significant others attached to one's mother shows a certain low civility quotient. Acting like a responsible adult would include a sincere apology accompanied by a real not fanciful offer of restitution even if restitution was not monetary but was washing the truck a couple times a month for a year.

Honest and honorable adults don't cause loss to others and then expect them to ignore the loss and offer another opportunity to show disrespect. Offering to rent a U-Haul was certainly turning the other cheek and walking the extra mile while being upset by the offer shows a lack of maturity and good sense. Totally childlike behavior, I want what I want the way I want it and nothing else with do. ME ME ME!!!

The good news is that some of the time they live long enough to grow out of it. The bad news is that often they don't.

Pat