Helping out former workplace buddy, old neighbor, relative, etc......

[ovrszd]

I have a story that some of you might appreciate.

I learned that my next door neighbor was having some severe back problems, such that he couldn't even mow his yard...we both had about an acre to mow, and I didn't mind mowing his yard for him. His was actually smaller than mine with less obstacles such that I could mow it quicker an easier than my own.

He also had a dead tree in his back yard that he had intended to remove, but never got around to it. I thought I would surprise him and remove it for him. So, I cut the tree down, and cut it up into fireplace sized logs, intending to burn it in my own fireplace. I thought to myself, that would be my "reward". I finally got the tree down, and all of the small branches I hauled to the creek. Since the stump was relatively small, I dug around it and chopped it out. I brought my small trailer around, raked up all of the chips and sawdust and remaining debris and put it in my trailer to take to the creek. I figured I would dump the trash, come back and haul the wood over to my woodpile.

About that time, he walked out into the back yard where I was raking up the last of the chips. He thanked me profusely. We talked for a few minutes, and when he turned to go back to his house, he said "Oh, don't worry getting rid of those logs, I'll burn them in the fireplace". I said "Good! I guess I'm through".

I thought it was funny, and never thought a thing of it. I loved the man like my own father, and when he got up in age, he and his wife moved to into town. I don't mind admitting it; I wept unashamedly. He was one of the finest men I had ever known. He has passed on now, and I do miss him. I am honored to have known him. May he Rest In Peace.

For the past 6 years I helped my neighbor at the farm as you describe. He never asked for help. As someone else said earlier, he might call or stop by and ask me what I was doing? That was his manner of asking for help. I never minded and always did more than he asked for. I always thought of it as "trading help". He would help me too. My wife was always more negative about it. Not bitchy. Just commenting that I help Steve way more than he helps me.

Steve died this past June of Cancer. I told him I would help his Widow thru this. Six months later I'm still helping her. My only regret is that I didn't spend more time "trading help" with Steve.

 

[2LaneCruzer]

For the past 6 years I helped my neighbor at the farm as you describe. He never asked for help. As someone else said earlier, he might call or stop by and ask me what I was doing? That was his manner of asking for help. I never minded and always did more than he asked for. I always thought of it as "trading help". He would help me too. My wife was always more negative about it. Not bitchy. Just commenting that I help Steve way more than he helps me.

Steve died this past June of Cancer. I told him I would help his Widow thru this. Six months later I'm still helping her. My only regret is that I didn't spend more time "trading help" with Steve.

Then you understand. God Bless...and I hope the wife comes to understand too.

 

[hturner12]

I have helped people, been taking advantage of , on rare occasion been helped. For the most part do not help people with money, food or a place to stay. May sound cruel but have been used too many times on thoses. There are a exceptions for my 2 closest freinds that I would do anything for and they would do the same for me

 

[ch1ch2]

I figure when there are two people in a partnership, that if each person does 60 to 80 percent of the the work, then they are both doing half.
I always try to do 60 to 80% of my part. I figure the other person thinks they are doing the same.

 

[jerrybob]

When I was growing up......we had a next door neighbor who was like a grandpa to me.......he taught me a lot and was my role model. He instilled in me that....no matter how successful you are......you have a responsibility to help others. Pretty good rule to live by.

 

[roadhunter]

I figure when there are two people in a partnership, that if each person does 60 to 80 percent of the the work, then they are both doing half.
I always try to do 60 to 80% of my part. I figure the other person thinks they are doing the same.

So true.

 

[bigtiller]

I think it was nice of you to help your former neighbor. Hopefully he will repay you in-kind someday soon.

The former work associate is a challenging thought. Maybe he seen the error of his ways and wants to make good on something that has been bothering him for awhile. Or maybe he wanted to borrow your trailer. We'll never know now.

 

[turnkey4099]

I have also helped many friends/family & neighbors in the past.I just right it off as the correct thing to do.My hope is God is keeping score.LOL..

Yep, it is just the way we live in the country, do it without expecting anything except "thanks" in return. What goes around comes around". I did have to haul a new neighbor up short when he came over to borrow the lawnmower the second time. I already knew that he had borrowed another neighbors mower. I explained to him that he couldn't expect his neighbors to provide mowers for him and then let him use mine with the understanding it would be the last time. Helped him out some a few times after that. Good freinds still.

 

[turnkey4099]

I have helped people, been taking advantage of , on rare occasion been helped. For the most part do not help people with money, food or a place to stay. May sound cruel but have been used too many times on thoses. There are a exceptions for my 2 closest freinds that I would do anything for and they would do the same for me

I have been burned a couple dtimes with people sdtranded 'out of gas', e.g., cans not returned, once returned with about a gallon of bad gas (mostly water and rust). Still help people out though.

 

[Industrial Toys]

No such things as Victims, only volunteers. Never do anything for someone and moan about it later.