Favorite sayings (minus religion, politics)

[bullbreaker]

Eat sh*t and Bark at the moon !

Never marry the first Lady you see naked !

 

[SJay]

Put a clamp on it Jed

 

[2LaneCruzer]

"Batches? We ain't got no batches; we don't need no batches...we don't have to show you no stinking batches!"

 

[JohnMacca]

From my mother - "If you can't say something nice about a person, don't say anything at all."

Saw a funny letter to the editor of a national newspaper last week, about Zimbabwe ex President Robert Mugabe dying.

"My mother said only say good about the dead. Mugabe is dead. Good."

 

[tjkubota93]

When my grandpa was heading put the door grandma would ask "where are you going?" He replied "he// probably"

 

[k0ua]

Don't let the screen door hit you where the Good Lord split you.

 

[check]

And more Dr McCoy witticisms: "Jim, I am a doctor not a miracle worker!"

My favorite is “Jim, I’m a doctor not a mason!” (Captain Kirk had just asked him to use some sort of cement mixture to patch up an injured creature that was made of silicone or something like that.)

 

[2LaneCruzer]

"Rock music sounds like an octopus making love to a bagpipe". Brother Dave Gardner

 

[snymat68]

That's what she said.
(Applicable to so many situations when your mind is as far in the gutter as mine is.)

There are 2 types of people...
1.) Those that can extrapolate from incomplete data.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

It only hurts til the pain stops!

 

[Fuddy1952]

When my grandpa was heading put the door grandma would ask "where are you going?" He replied "he// probably"

My Grandpa heading out the door when asked where he was going..."Crazy. Want to come along?".