Advice from the voice of EXPERIENCE !!

[txdon]

Dave's ancilliary rule: Always assume that the deer following the one that ran in front of you is determined to run into the side of your truck.

Or Prius causing all aluminum parts to be replaced. Prius DOA, deer laughing as he disappears into the woods . . . .

 

[txdon]

Mine has cruise, different than the throttle which it also has.

Yes, to expand a bit more for those without HST, the HST models have an adjustable foot speed control pedal, a throttle control by the steering wheel and the cruise control (left side by seat). The cruise control will hold the speed (foot pedal) at the set speed.

 

[mapper]

When cutting the top out of a fifty five gallon drum do not assume that the normally non-flammable residue in it (anti foam agent) cannot be ignited with a oxy-acetylene cutting torch, so you need not bother with filling said drum with water before cutting it.

Do not assume that your coworkers in the pulp, paper and chemical plant you are working in are going to let you off easy after their heart rates return to normal (big booms in chemical plants tend to make people really nervous)

Do assume you will need clean shorts afterwards:laughing:

 

[check]

DON'T approach a grazing Elk in the parking lot at the Banff School of Fine Arts.

 

[2LaneCruzer]

If you want to, spend many thousands of dollars to get your lawn looking something like a two acre pool table.

By all means, buy yourself a brand new tractor with a nice backhoe on the back.

You can even park that tractor on your lawn when you go for lunch and it is a good idea to lower the backhoe bucket teeth down on the grass to relieve the hydraulic pressure.

But after lunch, when you hop back on the tractor, DO NOT drive the tractor the full length of your lawn without lifting up the backhoe bucket.

It was a neighbour who demonstrated this valuable lesson. At least he was smart enough to get rid of the tractor before he caused even worse damage. I think his wife might have helped him make that decision!

While we're on the subject...When you move into your newly built home, if it hasn't been professionally landscaped, don't be hard headed and assume you can do it without repercussions. Forty years later, and $5000 to remove a couple of Cottonwoods and half a dozen Slash Pines planted too close to the house taught me a lesson...and I didn't even mention the squabble with the insurance company and a $10,000 roof.

 

[turnkey4099]

While we're on the subject...When you move into your newly built home, if it hasn't been professionally landscaped, don't be hard headed and assume you can do it without repercussions. Forty years later, and $5000 to remove a couple of Cottonwoods and half a dozen Slash Pines planted too close to the house taught me a lesson...and I didn't even mention the squabble with the insurance company and a $10,000 roof.

When planting new trees, try to visualize them full grown. Place them far enough away...now dig them up and move them another 50' and you'll be abbut right. I didn't do that. Next people in this 2 acres will have a VERY expensivwe tree removal project. I'm too old to worry about one of my seedling spruce planted in 1979 falling on the house.

 

[buckeyefarmer]

Dad has 2 small maples growing up 4 ft from his house. I said they need to go, they are too close to the house. He said, that will be someone else's problem. He's 93.

 

[buckeyefarmer]

Don't buy cheap steaks to save money.

 

[Goose69]

If your wife has brough home a new Great Pyreneese puppy, that still likes to jump up and scratch and nibble anything that moves......
.. Do NOT feel that you can relieve yourself outside as usual.!!
. It will turn into a whirling, turning, urination whitlwind, in an attempt to avoid losing any important bits.
....Then the wife will ask, while she is petting and cuddling the dog. "why is the dog all wet?"

.. which brings me to my second thing to never do,
.If you have accidentally peed all over the dog, because it thinks it is a game, and was trying to maul your manhood,
. DO not tell your wife what happened, especially while she is petting the dog.
...... And maybe number 3 on my list
.... Do not laugh while telling her, that the dog she is currently cuddling is covered in urine.
.
. She is now ensuring I get quality bonding time with the dog, as it appears I will be in the doghouse for quite sometime.

 

[GAFarmer2]

If your wife has brough home a new Great Pyreneese puppy, that still likes to jump up and scratch and nibble anything that moves......
.. Do NOT feel that you can relieve yourself outside as usual.!!
. It will turn into a whirling, turning, urination whitlwind, in an attempt to avoid losing any important bits.
....Then the wife will ask, while she is petting and cuddling the dog. "why is the dog all wet?"

.. which brings me to my second thing to never do,
.If you have accidentally peed all over the dog, because it thinks it is a game, and was trying to maul your manhood,
. DO not tell your wife what happened, especially while she is petting the dog.
...... And maybe number 3 on my list
.... Do not laugh while telling her, that the dog she is currently cuddling is covered in urine.
.
. She is now ensuring I get quality bonding time with the dog, as it appears I will be in the doghouse for quite sometime.

Goose, that just made my day. Thanks for posting....I needed a good laugh!

 

[thepumpguysc]

Goose>> I CAN RELATE.. LOL
Thanks for sharing..

 

[Goose69]

Goose, that just made my day. Thanks for posting....I needed a good laugh!

YW..!
I'm still laughing about it, and it happened days ago..!!

 

[k0ua]

A peed on puppy. OMG!

 

[rswyan]

Hilarious ...

 

[Woodeye]

That is seriously funny stuff.

 

[Dftodd]

If your wife has brough home a new Great Pyreneese puppy, that still likes to jump up and scratch and nibble anything that moves......
.. Do NOT feel that you can relieve yourself outside as usual.!!
. It will turn into a whirling, turning, urination whitlwind, in an attempt to avoid losing any important bits.
....Then the wife will ask, while she is petting and cuddling the dog. "why is the dog all wet?"

.. which brings me to my second thing to never do,
.If you have accidentally peed all over the dog, because it thinks it is a game, and was trying to maul your manhood,
. DO not tell your wife what happened, especially while she is petting the dog.
...... And maybe number 3 on my list
.... Do not laugh while telling her, that the dog she is currently cuddling is covered in urine.
.
. She is now ensuring I get quality bonding time with the dog, as it appears I will be in the doghouse for quite sometime.

I had the same issue potty training our German Shepherd when she was a pup. Didn't get her wet though. But it could see me laughing and telling her she's holding a pup covered in pee

I'll add to that one. If your full grown German Shepherd loves chasing and attacking water spray from a garden hose. Make sure she is put up first before watering your wifes flower beds. Gives a new meaning to "bull in a China shop" I think it was a couple months before I got out of the dog house

 

[1965]

DON'T COOK BACON NAKED!

 

[buckeyefarmer]

I find it hard to cook bacon that has clothes on.

 

[MacLawn]

Never confuse Coleman fuel, aka, white gasoline, for coffee water. BOOM. I know.

 

[shaeff]

I find it hard to cook bacon that has clothes on.

Thank you, I nearly snorted my delicious iced coffee out my nose! Hahahaha!