Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone.

   / Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone. #171  
Everyone keeps more stuff as they get older instead of selling or throwing it out.
Not this guy.
I'm almost 60 and have recently been shedding junk that collects over the years. If I haven't used it in 5 yrs or more its gone.
I came into this world with nothing and will leave this world with nothing.
 
   / Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone. #172  
I'm going through this now. Mom passed in September of 2022 and Dad just passed on July 10th. Plan is to divide up what the 5 siblings want to take, then maybe a garage sale. My brother and I brought up everything from the basement this weekend and put it in the garage until we get a dumpster delivered. Seems like these old timers sure didn't like to part ways with anything. The whole process just sucks though.
My parents were depression era, I was brought up “Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without”. I grew up saving things in case we could use it later. We always had plenty of room to store stuff. Often a project started with a conception, then a walk around to see what we had to do a prototype, then a (sometimes crude) model/first cut, then a final.
Still do.
My wife's parents and relatives were the same way.
Consequently we have (conservative estimate) one or two 40' shipping containers (PACKED) of "stuff". We've told our children - if we are dead we won't care, if you don't want it toss it, we are leaving them plenty of money and real estate.
But as long as we have plenty of space and are alive don't.
 
   / Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone. #173  
My parents were depression era, I was brought up “Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without”. I grew up saving things in case we could use it later. We always had plenty of room to store stuff. Often a project started with a conception, then a walk around to see what we had to do a prototype, then a (sometimes crude) model/first cut, then a final.
Still do.
My wife's parents and relatives were the same way.
Consequently we have (conservative estimate) one or two 40' shipping containers (PACKED) of "stuff". We've told our children - if we are dead we won't care, if you don't want it toss it, we are leaving them plenty of money and real estate.
But as long as we have plenty of space and are alive don't.
That's a lot of "stuff!"
 
   / Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone. #174  
That's a lot of "stuff!"
And not surprisingly it contains "stuff" from Grandparents, still in use. In probably the early '50's my Grandfather made a rather simple "knife grinder" from a circa 1920's refrigerator motor. It's still in use, about once or twice a rear, mainly to sharpen axes, lawnmower blades etc. My Grandfather's circa 1960 Delta tablesaw is the main saw in my shop in Virginia. I'd like a Saw Stop (my Grandfather cut off a part of a finger with the Delta) but I have not "used it out" yet.
 
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   / Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone. #175  
And not surprisingly it contains "stuff" from Grandparents, still in use. In probably the early '50's my Grandfather made a rather simple "knife grinder" from a circa 1920's refrigerator motor. It's still in use, about once or twice a rear, mainly to sharpen axes, lawnmower blades etc. My Grandfather's circa 1960 Delta tablesaw is the main saw in my shop in Virginia. I'd like a Saw Stop (my Grandfather cut off a part of a finger with it) but I have not "used it out" yet.
That's awesome! More proof that they don't build stuff like they used to!
 
   / Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone.
  • Thread Starter
#178  
Father-in-law was being quite mean to the kids (one is my spouse) because he didn't have the car anymore. His doc agreed but did say that the state of MN does have a cognitive test for driving. So my spouse headed back up to get him in to do it. The test was in three parts which as you pass them, go to the next. His ability was so poor they stopped the test during the 2nd portion. When the test operator said this, he broke down and cried. :cry:
 
   / Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone. #179  
Father-in-law was being quite mean to the kids (one is my spouse) because he didn't have the car anymore. His doc agreed but did say that the state of MN does have a cognitive test for driving. So my spouse headed back up to get him in to do it. The test was in three parts which as you pass them, go to the next. His ability was so poor they stopped the test during the 2nd portion. When the test operator said this, he broke down and cried. :cry:
That is pretty much what I did with my Mother on her last attempt at renewing her driver license when she was 86. I suspected (and I think she really did too) that she really shouldn't be driving, but I didn't want to have to be the one to tell her.

She had suffered a stroke and couldn't really use her right side, so shouldn't have been driving for that reason alone. Nevertheless, I took her to the DOT office and she failed the eye exam which was pretty much the end of it. I was relieved I didn't have to be the "bad guy".
 
   / Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone. #180  
My dad quit driving on his own but we were going to have to put a stop to it soon anyway. It’s tough to watch your parents go downhill. Enjoy the good moments.
 

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