Idiot neighbors & their ne'redo'ell children!

Bob_Skurka · Aug 5, 2004

Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

So I've been on vacaction and the house was left for the past 10 days alone, with the exception of one neighbor who picked up my mail & newspapers. I live on a private road, with 26 houses set in a 155 acre neighborhood. Everyone pretty much knows everyone and it is not that we are all friends, but for the most part we get along.

So a new family moved in last year, about a 1/4 mile down the road. They don't pay their association dues. They let their kids run wild on the road. The kids are known to "hunt" baby rabbits and baby birds on other people's property. So one of the little creatons broke into my daughter's playhouse and did a little damage. Nothing structural, just to some of her possessions.

The culprit was had another kid with him, also a new kid to the neighborhood. And both were caught by another neighbor.

So the neighbor who caught the kids drags both of them to one of the parents homes (the closer house) and tells the mom. Well mom #1 is horrified by the events and takes all the appropriate actions that a responsible adult should take, short of beating the child. The kid is grounded, he is coming over to apologize, he is replacing the damaged toy, etc. . .

So mom #1, who I now believe is a good mom, goes to the other child's mom (mom #2) and explains that the 2 kids were in on this together and explains the actions she has taken with her child. Mom #2 asks her child, this is the child who runs wild through the neighborhood hunting baby bunnies, and mom #2 is the mom who does not pay her neighborhood association dues, well anyway she asks her demon spawn about my child's playhouse and her child says that he didn't want to go onto my property, he didn't want to break into the playhouse, he didn't want to break my kid's toys . . . but the OTHER CHILD MADE HIM DO IT. So mom #2 says that mom #1's child is 100% to blame and mom #2 is not doing anything about this. And dad #2 is worse than mom #2, so I'm not going to get anywhere with him either.

So now I am faced with one honest mom and her child who is coming over to apologize, and one idiot mom and her lying delinquint child that everyone else believes is the REAL child criminal and the idiot mom and the likely real culprit is not taking responsibility.

Any ideas, short of a gunshot, on how to deal with this?

MicroPilot · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

Was the playhouse locked? Even if it weren't it is still trespassing. Do you know anyone in the law enforcement community? IF so see if maybe they could "have a talk" with the children/parents.

Bob_Skurka · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

( Was the playhouse locked? Even if it weren't it is still trespassing. Do you know anyone in the law enforcement community? IF so see if maybe they could "have a talk" with the children/parents. )

I have police officers on my payroll and we have an Indiana State Police detective in our neighborhood who I know. However, generally I have been told that for 12 year old deliquents with parents who don't seem to care, the police option is not usually a good one (I did ask for the police opinion before I posted my question).

dmccarty · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

Bob,

Was this the very pretty "playhouse" that you built for you daughter? I sure hope it was not damaged too much. Are they paying for the theft and damages?

A call to the local POlice might be in order. They are Juveniles so nothing will likely happen but at least there is a record is things continue.....

Is your daughter handling this ok?

Later,
Dan

Junkman · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

That police option that you termed "not a good one", actually is a good one. They need a wake up call and they need it now. To me, it sounds like the child is following in the parents footsteps and that is a bad thing. I have never agreed with the "he made me do it" excuse, because if the child that says that, knows that it is wrong, then he should know enough to go home and not get involved. I would make that call now, and not worry where the chips will fall. The worse thing to happen, will be the undesirable neighbors will move to another neighborhood. If they don't pay the association dues, does the association contract have a way to deal with that? I am a firm believer in getting a resolve to the problem before it gets to be a bigger problem. If you let this one go, it will just be the same next time. The parents will ignore it. If you take action now, the next time will be worse for the parents since there will be a history of this type behavior. Call the State Police today... The undisciplined child of today might be the thug of the neighborhood tomorrow. I remember watching a story on one of the television programs where a young child was always allowed to get away with any thing he did. When he grew up, he terrorized the small community and the people felt helpless. One night, it all came to a head, and the thug was murdered. Till this day, the town is silent as to what happened. It seems that they all know what happened, but will not tell because the thug had made everyone's life so miserable and the law was not willing to deal with it. Vigilante justice happened that night. I don't approve of this type of violence, but it does sometime happen. I am certain that you don't want this kid terrorizing the neighborhood in 15 years. Take action now, and it won't happen, at least not in your neighborhood. They might just move on...

Bob_Skurka · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

( Bob,

Was this the very pretty "playhouse" that you built for you daughter? I sure hope it was not damaged too much. Are they paying for the theft and damages?

A call to the local POlice might be in order. They are Juveniles so nothing will likely happen but at least there is a record is things continue.....

Later,
Dan )

Yup, the playhouse is the 2 room minature house playhouse that I built, and fortunately it was not damaged at all. Only some of my daughter's toys inside were damaged. So I don't have to do any real repairs, because if I did, the police would definately be involved. The damage to toys was actually pretty minimal, and the one child involved is going to replace the toys.

The issue to me, is really an issue of honesty, morality and principle. Or as the old Superman TV should would say, "truth, justice & the American way." I just hate to see the idiot kid and his idiot parents take no responsibility. A simple apology would likely suffice. But they won't even do that.

shvl73 · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

I would also be tempted to get the police involved, whatever the outcome. Maybe if child #1 ends up paying the complete restitution, the lesson will be learned by child #1 & his parents, to stay away from child #2. If the law got involved, couldn't demon child's lowlife parents be forced to make restitution?
However it works out, it's too bad your family has to deal with these creeps.

hennydamule · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

I would suggest strength in numbers. Get together a neighborhood meeting about the offenders, set up a website or email list, and let everyone know what the story is. This affects your entire community, in the sense that their property values are directly related to what the surrounding neighborhood is like. I assume that you've checked any by-laws that your community might have regarding the payment of dues, etc., but I'm sure that is something else the rest of the community would like to know about.

Other than that, you can always blow the whistle on any code violations they may have, etc. Organize with the neighbors to "phone flood" anytime there is the slightest of problems. That is, an organized flooding of calls from the entire community, whenever anyone has reason for it.
Mind you, these last suggestions are fairly drastic ones and are only for those who really deserve to be treated as such, but that's for you to decide.

Good Luck, and, oh yeah, there's always the flaming bag of dog doo on the porch. /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif

Bob_Skurka · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

Junkman . . . we can actually prevent them from selling their home if they don't pay the dues, and we've had to publish their name in the newsletter to get their overdue dues in the past.

I think the reason the police option is generally believed to be a bad option is that usually the parents are harder on the kids than the police can be. But in this case, if the parents don't hone up to the problem, then I may resort to calling the police. I think it would be prudent to wait for the first apology from the responsible child, and then I think if child #2 doesn't come forward, a call to the police might be the correct answer????

shvl73 · Aug 5, 2004

Re: Idiot neighbors & their ne\'redo\'ell children!

Maybe if you explain to the police that one of the vandals has accepted responsibility, they can focus their attention on the one that won't. A call to the parents of child #1, so they are aware of the results (or lack of) from parents #2, & are aware the authorities are looking into it. That way they won't be suprised & are aware it's not because of their obviously responsible reaction to the situation.